Sevan Matossian (00:00):
We’re live. I took three deuces this morning. Do that. You ever drop a deuce and then
Matthew Souza (00:07):
Double back again?
Sevan Matossian (00:10):
You drop a deuce, you finish, you do whatever, wash your hands, maybe start to get dressed again. Then you’re like, oh,
Matthew Souza (00:18):
Huh,
Sevan Matossian (00:22):
Today was three Dees.
Matthew Souza (00:24):
Wow.
Sevan Matossian (00:25):
Yeah,
Matthew Souza (00:26):
That’s a record.
Sevan Matossian (00:27):
And my wife always says to me, you’re shitting again. I’m like, yeah, I think she’s jealous. And I’m not even joking.
Matthew Souza (00:35):
You get three. I haven’t even gone once.
Sevan Matossian (00:38):
I just looked at my road caster and it wants to update the firmware and I want to do it so bad, but it would fuck the whole show up for 15 minutes. I was like, don’t do that. I don’t want to do it. Hey, in the early days when we started the podcast, Susana, I would come in and I would see my computer needs to be updated and it was like four minutes left. I’d do it and then it would pop up and say, process is going to take 40 minutes.
Matthew Souza (01:02):
Oh my goodness.
Sevan Matossian (01:08):
I went to a 15 year affiliate reunion yesterday.
Matthew Souza (01:13):
Yeah. How was that?
Sevan Matossian (01:18):
The owner’s cool. The gym’s beautiful, to be honest with you. It was a little depressing. Why? Because you could tell how hard the guy worked. He has a kid, he has a wife, he’s got over a hundred people there at the party. And just from talking to him, I could tell life is still a struggle. You know what I mean? He’s been doing it for 15 years and he’s not sitting on a duplex somewhere. He’s not getting ahead.
Matthew Souza (01:58):
Yeah,
Sevan Matossian (01:59):
He Diego, he’s not getting ahead. Alison, what’s up girl? Yo actually wasn’t in San Diego. It was in San Bernardino County. What’s up Alison? A long time. Good to see you girl. Alison, are you not posting on your Instagram? I just started following you again yesterday on my new account and it looked like you had, I was like, has she not posted in two years? I wonder what you’re up to. Kenneth. What’s up dude? Good morning. Boy. So many things. There was this lady at the affiliate party, what do you call that? 15 year party? 15 year anniversary. 15 year celebration.
Matthew Souza (02:40):
Both.
Sevan Matossian (02:40):
Yeah. And she was so fucking attractive and no makeup. Just had her hair in a ponytail. I don’t know how old she was. I couldn’t tell if she was 30, 40 or 50. Her husband was there. Really cool dude. She was so, I mean, she just stood out. She was so attractive and she was really nice. And I hung out with her a bunch and I talked to her and when we left she gives me this big, huge crazy hug. And she goes, I really like you. And looked, she looked me over, looked my body over with her eyes. And I really like, I forget how she said it, but I really like how feminine you are or something like that. It was something, it was crazy though. It was wild. And I’ve been wearing these joggers that I got in the Gaines box, these cartel barbell cartel joggers. And I’ve been pretty, I really like them and it’s all I wear now, but I’m starting to think that I look like Roman Koff. I think maybe I’ve, it looks like I’m wearing almost like Lululemons, do you know what I mean? Like skin type pants? Yeah.
(04:08):
I’m thinking maybe not. Maybe I shouldn’t wearing, maybe I shouldn’t be wearing, I don’t know. But she scanned me up and down and she told me
Matthew Souza (04:18):
She scanned you. And it says,
Sevan Matossian (04:19):
But maybe I’m also in denial. You know the gay kid in high school, he’s good looking. He hangs out with all the hot chicks. Yeah, like she was saying, I like being You’re safe. You’re impotent, you’re safe. Yeah. Yeah. I feel like maybe I’m just walking around looking like that, but I don’t have the rest of it to, if that’s just straight gay, what he’s wearing. And by gay, I mean if that’s apparel that’s supposed to seduce men, but he’s got enough muscle to compensate it and other things going on that he doesn’t straight turn into like, Hey, that guy’s on Grinder. I dunno. I dunno. sa you’re having a midlife crisis.
Matthew Souza (05:03):
Jeffrey’s got it figured out for us. Wait, Olivia, I told you that before. What
Sevan Matossian (05:09):
Did she say? Oh, she did? What did she say? Where is that?
Matthew Souza (05:12):
It just right here. But she just said, I told you that before.
Sevan Matossian (05:16):
Oh man, you did tell me that. That man, so do I have to stop? Do I need to stop wearing these? Because I started as we were flying back from San Diego and I was dozing off in my sleep. I’m like, so is everywhere I been going for the last two months. All the other parents are like, Hey, that father’s in transition. Do you have any people in your circle who are going through transition? Like anyone who goes to your gym or you
Matthew Souza (05:42):
Mean not transitioning from male to female, but just in a season?
Sevan Matossian (05:46):
No, no, no, no. I mean that you go to Starbucks and there’s a dude there and all of a sudden every day you go there for the last three years, he’s getting more and more feminine than one day. He is a girl. Do you have anyone in your circle? Yeah. Yeah, we did. We did. So I’m wondering, are people like, man, at least I cut my hair. Someone in the comment said that I look like Italian bag lady. And when I looked in the mirror when I had my hair long, I was like, oh yeah, I see that. You know what I mean? She lost her. What are those things called that you squeeze in your girl? Your girl’s looking in the mirror and she’s pulling hair tweezers. It was, I look like an Italian lady who lost her tweezers. If you’re a woman, I know you get that.
(06:33):
You know exactly what I’m saying. Oh, Olivia’s going hard. And that sucks too because she’s hot as fuck. That’s the last I know. That’s why I keep bringing it up. You look like Roman and need to quit that look. It’s not attractive shit. Alright. Okay. Alright. Now here’s the other side. There’s this video. I’ll play this video for you. This video is, I did not enjoy this video at all, and then I didn’t know who this was. Lemme see if you know who this is. Do you know who this is? Do you recognize any of these people in this picture? Don’t read anything. I don’t think it says their name. Okay, so you don’t recognize these people? No. One of these people, and I watched this video last night. My wife sent it to me last night and I watched it. I’m like, this is so stupid. But I wouldn’t tell my wife that. I’m like, oh, okay. Actually, I would tell her. And then this morning she told me about it. I’m like, yeah, that was stupid. But then she told me who it is in the video. You know who it is very clearly. But listen to this video. It’s kind of long. Here we go.
Speaker 3 (07:39):
Sure. Of my niece and I from one weekend morning, she’d slept over and we got up and we’re having tea and playing cards and having this beautiful morning. It was great. I felt great about it. And my sweet little niece reposted it a couple of days later and interesting things happened. The amount of people that felt absolutely required to talk about how terrible I looked in the picture that I’m not aging well, that I look like a man. Why would I even post a picture like this? And I look that terrible. People saying, God, I didn’t even recognize her. This is what she looks like. And then the fights that break out within the common where someone says, you should be nice. Why should I be nice? She looks terrible. And people start fighting within the comments. I was amazed at what that made me feel.
(08:35):
I’m a 50-year-old woman and I know who I am. And still my feelings got hurt. I was so hurt that people couldn’t see the point of it, the sweetness of it, the absolute shining joy of that photo. And I thought, God, what if I was 15? That’s just devastating. And it really made me see all the things about hearts and clicks and likes, and you realize there is something neurological about this whole system. That was fascinating to me. And I think it taught me a lot about being a young person in today’s society. I posted a picture,
Sevan Matossian (09:19):
Julia Roberts, after I started playing. I was like, oh wait, so I didn’t know till this morning. And the thing is, no, I don’t think there’s any amount of seon or you look like you suck cock for a living. That could affect me. So that’s the other flip side of it. I don’t care at all. I think maybe I pretend like I care because it’s a safe place to pretend. You know how a magician would use sleight of hand and be like, look over here, look over here, look over here. So I pretend like I care. So it keeps all the attacks over here. I’m like, look, that hurts. Attack me over there. But really it doesn’t. Do you know what I mean? Yeah, yeah. God forbid you actually say something that actually hurts me. Someone posted in the comments the level what a waste of money it is to take the level one that hurts me way more than, Hey, you look like you suck dick for a living and you look like you’re turning to Italian bag lady. I mean, look at this. There’s a crazy comment in here already. Let me see this one.
(10:41):
Bernie. Won’t seon always be. Look, it just is. This guy’s just delegating reality. It’s not even a discussion. Won’t Seon always be the artsy feminine dude who probably has a hammer, but he’s just not a masculine presence in the room? Man, damn bird. Damn. Oh man. Guus link. Insult, savvy all you want. Just don’t say anything bad about Greg or anything, Greg. Yeah, I do like the interaction and what Allison says. I see how it could mess with a teenager for sure. That’s the thing. That’s the first of all, I think when I look at this picture, I just see two beautiful women who obviously just woke up in the morning. And so for anyone to call them ugly, and I don’t mean this, I want to say this without the normal showmanship that I usually say in the morning, but if you’re attracted to tattoos and fake boobs and collagen and makeup and high heels and deodorants and shampoos and fancy cars and all of that stuff, to what if those are the things that your radar attracts you to and the smell of synthetic toothpaste on people’s breasts and all that. I’m a hundred percent certain as I am about anything that something’s wrong with you.
(12:22):
You should be in your healthiest state. You should be attracted to someone who just walks out of the ocean with their hair looking thick as shipped from saltwater with no makeup on and the sun shining on them with natural lighting with a smile on their face. And they’ve been living that lifestyle for 10 years. These guys that, who’s the guy who goes on Joe Rogan’s podcast and other podcasts and he’s like the guru guy. He was really big a couple years ago and he’s always saying all these wise things someone will say in the comments, but he’s just this hairy old guy and he has a name that starts with an S like Du or
Matthew Souza (13:03):
Oh, send grew or,
Sevan Matossian (13:06):
Yeah, good job. Susa.
Matthew Souza (13:08):
Yeah,
Sevan Matossian (13:11):
That guy doesn’t look like for a second that anyone’s worried about whether he’s attractive or fuckable.
Matthew Souza (13:16):
Same guru.
Sevan Matossian (13:17):
Yeah. Do you remember the guy on the Simpsons? He was the farmer and he was an old man and then in some episodes he would just tear off his shirt and he was all jacked and shit.
Matthew Souza (13:31):
Yeah. Willie the groundskeeper.
Sevan Matossian (13:34):
Was
Matthew Souza (13:34):
That what you’re thinking of?
Sevan Matossian (13:35):
No, not in liver King. You see liver king and you should know right away, something’s wrong there too. Yeah. Do you believe this, lemme take a few steps back. Do you think that there’s something here? So the other day I’m driving and there’s someone I hadn’t thought of in three years, and then two hours later they call me
(13:56):
And I haven’t talked to him in three years or this used to happen all the time at work because I spent so much time with Dave and Greg. I would say something to Dave and he’d be like, how do you know that? And I’m like, I don’t know that I’m just asking you and you’re just on sync with these people. There’s a comms going on out there. I’m not talking about nuances and gestures or what boxers see if someone flinches, they know that that hip movement means a roundhouse is coming. I’m talking about maybe something in the ether that this thing that we call space isn’t really space. That we are actually in something that has form and somehow we’re all communicating in a way that we don’t know. We’re communicating. Do you buy that? Does everyone buy that? Is there anyone who doesn’t buy that? I should ask Greg that because he’s extremely logical. I wonder if he buys that.
Matthew Souza (14:43):
Yeah, I think to a certain degree. And even the more success that you’ve had in life, I think you even buy it even more. And if you don’t, you’re ignoring it. And I always think they’re frequencies and sometimes you could get really tuned into someone’s frequency to where it’s all fuzzy. It’s fuzzy, then you hit the knob and it’s in sync.
Sevan Matossian (15:02):
That’s
Matthew Souza (15:02):
The way I visualize it as it’s happening.
Sevan Matossian (15:07):
One of the most powerful ones I had was I wasn’t in college, but I was living in the college town and I was dating Haley at the time, and for about two weeks I all of a sudden got really paranoid I was going to die. It was so strange. I started getting this crazy paranoid. I started being terrified of my own death. And then lo and behold, about two weeks after having that, I was walking one night and that’s the night I saw the guy in the car hit five people and kill them and jump out and scream. I’m the angel of death.
Matthew Souza (15:37):
Oh wow.
Sevan Matossian (15:38):
And I remember that night telling Haley, oh shit, it wasn’t my own death. Somehow I had some awareness that something was going to happen, but because my frequency, the fidelity of my understanding, it wasn’t my own death. It was someone else’s. It was death. Just death. And it was the, you just interpret
Matthew Souza (16:00):
It as your own. But
Sevan Matossian (16:01):
Yeah, because of the ego or whatever, because it, it’s always all about you. Me.
Matthew Souza (16:08):
Yeah. That’s crazy. Stuff like that happens all the time, I feel like too.
Sevan Matossian (16:11):
And so if we buy that notion, then all of these other things would just be interference with it. The cell phone, the fake boobs, the high heels, the deodorants, all the things that would come in that would interfere with that signal, that frequency, those comms. What’s your point, Sevi. So when I see Julia Roberts here and I see people in that space, they haven’t put it in context or relativity with the humanity that they are swimming in. We are not swimming with creatures that have high quality discernment of what is attractive. We are not, and I guess at the end of the day, what would be the best mate for the pure procurement of the success of the species? I remember one time Greg said to me, why the Jews are so successful? And I go, no, why? He said They find hard work as an intelligence, as sexy.
Matthew Souza (17:36):
So they’re open to it. They’re looking for it
Sevan Matossian (17:38):
Somehow. Somehow in that culture, they have found hard work and intelligence as sexy and so forth that they make based on that premise.
Matthew Souza (17:47):
Yeah. Well imagine finding a that doesn’t value hard work and that things should be owed.
Sevan Matossian (17:54):
What
Matthew Souza (17:54):
Would that produce? Right
Sevan Matossian (18:00):
This, do you remember being a kid? What about this? And I don’t have the answer to this. Do you remember that being a kid and people would, you’d be like, how do you know when you’re going to get married? And people would be like, you just know.
Matthew Souza (18:13):
Yeah.
Sevan Matossian (18:19):
Did you just know? How did you know?
Matthew Souza (18:25):
I guess after a long time you’re like, oh, this is my girlfriend. And then you go, ah, that doesn’t really describe the relationship as it should be. It’s more than just that.
Sevan Matossian (18:37):
I think some people just get married because it’s probably on some level, Hey, I need to do this so I can get onto the next thing
Matthew Souza (18:44):
A hundred percent. And I think the younger kids get married like that. It doesn’t end well
Sevan Matossian (18:51):
Or it’s logical. Okay. She’s a nurse, she’s stable. I mean, I’m speaking from the man’s point of view. She’s attractive. They don’t do the long-term look like. Okay. She thinks well, and we can get through some really hard, I could get through some really hard, I mean that’s probably a good barometer. I could get through some really hard times with this girl. Hey, could we live in a van together?
Matthew Souza (19:18):
Yeah. And I think definitely. I think there’s a book called 101 Questions to Answer Before Getting Married or something like that is it starts to break that down. I don’t know. I actually, I didn’t listen or I didn’t listen to it or read it, but it was basically the premise of it from some of the stuff I watched was just asking those big life questions so that way it’s not a surprise because most people won’t. And the number one question it was around the most is finances because that’s the number one. Number one reason for divorce is finances. And so if you’re somebody who’s like, I don’t really care, we’ll do this. It’s not important to me. I don’t have a savings or we just aren’t going in two separate directions with that. That’s something that you can’t just ignore because eventually that’s not going to work and so it leads you down. Questions like that.
Sevan Matossian (20:09):
I think this is on the most superficial level, I’m just throwing this out here as an immediate quick thought. I find it for a woman to be attracted to a man who she thinks is going to make a lot of money or who has a lot of money because that offers stability, right? Security, stability, someone who can repair the refrigerator without worrying about it, they’ll be at peace. They won’t be stressed out. They can pay the rent. And I think for a man to be attracted to a woman, he should find a woman that’s really attracted to him. I think as a man, you need a woman who’s like crazy attracted to you. Don’t worry how much you’re attracted to her. You need a woman who is really, really attracted to you, like who you are
Matthew Souza (21:02):
And champions. You doesn’t want to slow you down or tour you from what you’re trying to go after
Sevan Matossian (21:07):
Because as a man, especially as a man, you’re going to have these needs from a woman and they’re going to come naturally and easier for her if she’s really attracted to you. So if you think that, oh, well, I’m not as attracted to her, I think that that could be, oh, Jay Hartle, marry your hype woman. Yeah. So addicted to your scent. Well, that’s interesting you say that because my wife to this day loves the way I smell, loves, loves, loves, loves the way I smell. Yeah. Maybe it’s as simple as that
Matthew Souza (21:52):
Could be
Sevan Matossian (21:53):
Anyway, so if someone, some hot shit called me a homo at the party and then Julia Roberts kind of got me thinking. It’s like, dude, it’s so obvious to me you’re not unattractive. But also, I like what Allison said too, if you’re a young kid, I mean I, to walk around, I had a brush everywhere with me in high school, so I could always, I was obsessed with brushing my hair, making sure my hair looked perfect. I had one in my truck, one in my backpack, one in my locker when I was in the second grade. I carry a comb in my back pocket. Did you ever carry a comb in your back pocket?
Matthew Souza (22:30):
No. No.
Sevan Matossian (22:33):
Fuck. I was cool.
Matthew Souza (22:35):
Sounds cool.
Sevan Matossian (22:37):
Did any kids at your school, did any kids at your school carry a comb in your back pocket?
Matthew Souza (22:43):
Well, I specifically remember the one that was made to look like a switchblade, but when you flick the button, it opened up into a comb and I
Sevan Matossian (22:50):
Got those for my kids
Matthew Souza (22:51):
Back pocket. Oh, see, like Cody says it too, switchblade comb
Sevan Matossian (22:56):
Back. Oh, I had this one. I’ll show you. I had this one. I’ll show you which one I had. I had this one and the handle would hang out in my back pocket like that. Yeah. I watched too much grease. Yeah, it was like that. I watched grease a hundred times as
Matthew Souza (23:12):
A kid. Look at you. Yeah. Reminds me of a comb. Uncle Bobby used to carry, he was cool.
Sevan Matossian (23:18):
Did he have one in his back pocket?
Matthew Souza (23:20):
Yeah.
Sevan Matossian (23:24):
Now I haven’t used a brush or a comb. I can’t remember. It’s been over 30 years. My kids don’t use brushes or combs. I wonder if they’re going to go through that. Yeah, fawns. Yeah. I liked happy days too. I love Fonzie. Oh yeah, Fonzie. Did Fonzi carry a comb in his back pocket?
Matthew Souza (23:51):
Yeah. And then he would do pull it up. Oh
Sevan Matossian (23:52):
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. Okay.
Matthew Souza (23:56):
Alright. Hey, has any of the boys started rebelling against the way you want them to dress or just superficial shit that now they’re trying to take control of?
Sevan Matossian (24:06):
No, but my wife told me yesterday, she’s like, Hey, I don’t really think the boys should be wearing girls’ pants anymore.
Matthew Souza (24:17):
Which is ironic given her whole conversation right now.
Sevan Matossian (24:19):
She’s like, Hey, for those of you don’t know, my boys are always in these, they’re girl stretch pants that I just get on Amazon and then they wear wife beaters. They look like ballerinas and then they look like male ballerinas. And then when they wear wife beaters and then they wear argyle vest and on top of that they wear argyle sweater just always,
Matthew Souza (24:39):
Yeah, grace calls it the uniform.
Sevan Matossian (24:41):
The uniform, yeah. They got the uniform and my wife was like, and they’re pretty yoked and they all have huge asses because of how much squatting and jumping we do. I mean, we do a lot of squatting and jumping and so they have these little bulbous asses and it’s pretty funny. I’m not going to push back on it at all. Good morning.
Matthew Souza (25:09):
Do other parents trip out when they see Avi’s arm? It’s not a normal arm, dude. His shoulder and his tricep look looks normal in anatomy, but not on somebody his age.
Sevan Matossian (25:22):
Yeah. I can’t believe more people don’t trip on it.
Matthew Souza (25:26):
I noticed it right away in the videos when he pulls himself up on something, I’m like, damn, how does his arms look better than mine?
Sevan Matossian (25:31):
Yeah, his arms and his chest and his shoulders and his back and all of ’em are starting to get like that.
Matthew Souza (25:37):
It’s crazy. He looks like it started to become a Greek God chiseled out of the marble. You just see with just crazy ripped and everything’s defined from those statues. You’re like, oh, that’s how you build it like that. You just start ’em when they’re fucking five. By the time he’s 25, it’ll just be,
Sevan Matossian (25:57):
We were the skate park the other day and he was wearing blue underwear, like dark blue underwear, like tidy whitey, and I could see it through the back of his pants. He had ripped a flap in the back of his girl’s stretch pants, and he comes over to me and he takes off his helmet and sweats pouring out, and he sits down and he’s like, God, I got to tear in my pants. He goes, I’m done skating. And I look at him and I go, please don’t tell me you give a shit that people can see your underwear. He goes, no, I don’t give a shit. He goes, I’m just tired. I’m like, okay. If I tore a hole in my pants and I was nine years old, that’d be it. I’d run to the car and be crying. Yeah. That someone saw my underwear, I’d be toast
Matthew Souza (26:37):
For sure.
Sevan Matossian (26:38):
So don’t want ’em to be a little
Matthew Souza (26:39):
Bitch. I wonder how much of that has to do with public school?
Sevan Matossian (26:43):
Probably. Yeah. Well, what’s funny, we were hanging out with some kids the other day and the kids called him fat. They said he was fat. I know he has the fucking eight pack and someone called him fat. Yeah. Okay. He told me that. I’m like, what do you think? He’s all, they’re fucking crazy. He’s like, I’m so buff.
Matthew Souza (27:00):
Yeah. Yeah. It’s funny. I remember I got in trouble. My dad took away my baggy jeans in the fifth grade, and I had to go to school with normal sized jeans on and you would’ve thought the world fucking, I still remember it now, at 36, you would’ve were trauma
Sevan Matossian (27:13):
Traumatized,
Matthew Souza (27:14):
Melted. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I got in trouble and was like, guess what? You’re not wearing any of this dumb shit to school. Put on a polo in the tighter slack pants. And I was like, no. And it’s not because I really cared how I dressed in it. It was fine. It was comfortable, but I just knew I was going to go to school and everybody’s going to look at me and I was going to feel like a weirdo.
Sevan Matossian (27:33):
Did you get picked on
Matthew Souza (27:36):
Average? Picked on?
Sevan Matossian (27:38):
No. But did anyone say anything about those pants you wore that day?
Matthew Souza (27:40):
I can’t even remember to be honest, but I just remember how I felt trying to wear ’em to school.
Sevan Matossian (27:47):
I was at the airport the other day. I was at the private airport. It’s all fucking filthy rich people. And we’re getting into Greg’s beautiful plane, and there’s a plane next to me and it’s a father and wife and the two kids and the kids were dressed. I would be so bummed if my kids were dressed like that. You couldn’t see their bodies at all. They were in the baggies pants and the baggiest shirt, and it just looked cumbersome like in a heavy wind. It would catch their clothes and blow them away. You know what I mean? I was like, oh my God, if my boys ever start dressing and all their skater friends dress like that, so all the skater friends dress in. When we go to the skate park, my kids are always amongst the best skaters there, if not usually the best, but occasionally there’s kids who are better, but all the kids are dressed in all the skater gear, baggy shirt, the special skater shoes. The crazy baggy pants. They don’t even strap their helmet all the way, of course. But those kids all love my kids. They all gravitate to my kids. But yeah, it’s a trip.
Matthew Souza (29:01):
Yeah. Your boys definitely have a magnetic pool. I imagine it’s probably really strong at the skate park because not often do you see kids that roll up and then all of a sudden you just start seeing ’em shredding and you’re like, oh, it’s like it’s attractive.
Sevan Matossian (29:13):
And they’re not dicks about it either. Some kids will come to the skate park and just start going as hard as they can to let every kid there know how good they are.
Matthew Souza (29:20):
Oh yeah.
Sevan Matossian (29:20):
Yep. My kids don’t do that shit at all. Yeah.
Matthew Souza (29:23):
We used to be assholes at the skate park. Sometimes
Sevan Matossian (29:26):
They just chill. Went, when I went to this 15 year reunion, they had a CEO flag banner that vindicate sells, like this thing that made me feel good. And they had the OG culture one up. Cool. And the owner pulled me aside and he said, Hey, I just want to tell you, you’re the realest dude ever, and I really appreciate what you’re doing to maintain the culture at CrossFit and.
The above transcript is generated using AI technology and therefore may contain errors.
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