Matthew Souza (00:00):
Doing right, we’re not changing anything. Correct. Okay.
Speaker 2 (00:09):
Our first victim is gone. Taylor Self is here. The next victim is waiting in the,
Speaker 3 (00:24):
What’s this? Blind, relentless, constant pursuit of excellence that’s
Sevan Matossian (00:33):
Welcome to the greatest show on the internet. Kill Taylor. Yay.
(00:38):
My voice is back. Fuck. I’m stoked. Behind the scenes you can’t see him. Bryson Del Monte running the clock saying some other stuff, supporting Taylor, holding his hand, wiping up semen off the floor, things like that. Also, behind the scenes, not wiping up semen. Caleb Bieber, who’s from an airport as he switches locations from one to two. All bottom, bottom, bottom. The man, the myth, the legend. Pedro Pedro, Pedro White, some people call him Peter Hales from the great island of Ireland. Pedro’s Coffee Pods and Wads Station is absolutely exploding. I hate it when people say he’s gotten so good at interviews because he’s been fucking great for a long time. There’s some great interviews there. Go check them out. Tyler Watkins, CEO, founder of the Heat one app. Finally, someone making CrossFit fun, executive producer of the Stevon podcast and the founder of the Exploding thing that everyone’s talking about. It’s the place where all the affiliates are slowly every day coming one by one to share best practices, get free content. Everything over there is free. Matus is building a hub. What’s the website for that? Susa?
Matthew Souza (01:49):
It’s a platform called School. sk. OOL.
Sevan Matossian (01:52):
Oh, that’s gangster. That feels inclusive.
Matthew Souza (01:55):
It’s very inclusive. The wording’s actually the rainbow too.
Sevan Matossian (01:59):
School is cool. This week’s $500 to make it 1500, $1,500. If you can beat Taylor Self, the greatest CrossFit athlete who’s ever walked Planet Earth, the person adding $500 to the pile today is bottom of the pyramid and that is a fucking genius name for a nutrition company. Better Pyramid, oh no, sorry, bottom of the pyramid. That’s Greg Glassman’s hierarchy, his pyramid, and at the base is nutrition. If you would like to understand that idea and incorporate it into your life, the bottom of the pyramid Company will help you. They will give you the tools you need, either one person, two people, three people. You can bring them into your affiliate and they’ll run in a program in your affiliate and they will get your entire team or your single person working to eat in the best way possible so that your DNA, so that your chutzpah can express itself in the way that it was supposed to express itself. Greg Glassman was the one that would say often in front of big crowds. I know you guys see me as the fitness guy and I would love to lie to you and tell you fitness is the most important thing, but it is not. It is bottom of the pyramid. The QR code is down there at the bottom. They can serve as one people to a thousand people. Hit ’em up. And then finally, ladies and gentlemen, I’m so excited when we have stuff like this.
(03:23):
God bless Gabe from Paper Street Coffee for leading the way. Fit Aid is giving 40% off. The QR code is in the upper right hand corner.
(03:35):
Yep. Yeah, 40% off. Dude, that is absolutely insane. What’s crazy is three years ago I was begging for a Fit Aid sponsor and fucking, they wouldn’t even look my way. It’s probably all that bottom of the pyramid nutrition I’ve been doing that’s giving me this physique that’s now made that fit. Eight will look my way. We got to hang out with Aaron, the CEO over there at Fit Aid. We had several just fun hangouts with him and finally he’s like, yo, dude, let’s do something together. I was like, fuck yeah, I was tickling his balls when he said that, so maybe that had something to do with it. But anyway, stoked. These have creatine in him. Someone was making fun of me. They said, Hey, there’s not a significant amount of creatine in it, but I did a little research. One can of creatine Fit aid has as much creatine as an eight ounce steak. So you drink one of these with a steak and then hit a wad. Alright. Bryson del Monte, you can’t see his face and you can’t see his body because he wears shirts that are 12 sizes too big. Will now tell us we workout. Oh, by the way, and behind the scenes, the reason why everything looks beautiful is the great wheel brand setter. Okay, let’s go the workout.
Speaker 5 (04:36):
So the workout is four time, seven wall complex, 14 box jump, seven wall complex, 14 box jump. Seven wall complex. Wall complex is one wall walk with a handstand pushup at a 10 by 30 inch tape line to the wall and a 60 inch tape line away from the wall for guys 55 inches. For ladies, the box jump is to 40 inches for guys, 36 inches from ladies. When you start the workout, you have to be behind, farther away from the wall than your 60 inch tape line or 55 inch facing the wall.
Sevan Matossian (05:09):
The new fentanyl listening to Bryson tell you what A workout is safer than fentanyl and puts you to sleep faster. Bryson ante’s, fentanyl. Safe, effective. Thank you, Bryson. The fuck kind of workout is that someone needs to vet these fucking workouts. What’s wrong with it? I don’t even understand it. Of course you don’t.
Speaker 6 (05:29):
He’s doing wall walks. We’re
Sevan Matossian (05:30):
Ready when?
Speaker 6 (05:31):
Then he thought, how the fuck am I going to stop cold winning? I know.
Sevan Matossian (05:37):
We’re ready when you are. We will come back as soon as Taylor’s done. Pedro will give us a free breakdown on why no one can beat Taylor this week. $1,500 is a prize. Text me if you want to get a shot at it. Phone number, right
Speaker 5 (05:50):
Hand corner. Yeah.
Sevan Matossian (05:51):
Caleb,
Speaker 5 (05:52):
10 seconds. 9, 8, 7, 6, 5 4, 3, 2, 1. Go.
Sevan Matossian (06:04):
And we’re off. And we’re off and we’re off and we’re
Tyler Watkins (06:06):
Off and we’re off. Oh, nice. Used to the effect. Yeah, that was, whoa. He almost, he pressed weird on that first one.
Sevan Matossian (06:13):
Do you have to have those lines? Do you have to have those lines? Yes.
Tyler Watkins (06:16):
Yes. This is standard now the 60 inch I’m not sure of. I feel like that’s a little different, man. He’s going way faster than I previously assumed. I thought it was going to take about a minute to do these.
Sevan Matossian (06:30):
What is the second line for? I don’t get it. I don’t get what? Touch
Tyler Watkins (06:33):
That line.
Matthew Souza (06:35):
The hands have to, well, I think it’s measured appropriately. You’ll be
Sevan Matossian (06:40):
Right. How would Tater tot
Tyler Watkins (06:41):
Do it? 36 seconds. This is the
Sevan Matossian (06:43):
Heist workout.
Speaker 6 (06:44):
I mean, tater tots fault for bit anyway,
Matthew Souza (06:46):
So I mean look at that jump. You think that’s the problem? The tape’s the problem. Look at that jump.
Tyler Watkins (06:51):
You know what I like about this workout? We don’t have to count very high.
Sevan Matossian (06:56):
Oh, I see. Yeah, that is nice. Oh, and look what I got this week. I have a
Speaker 6 (07:00):
Somewhere. It especially entertaining when someone smacks their head off the wall as well.
Matthew Souza (07:05):
I feel like this is more of a party trick than it doesn’t work out this week, huh?
Tyler Watkins (07:09):
No. Jesus. Why? It’s like
Matthew Souza (07:11):
Because dude, look at him. He’s crawling around on the army, crawling around the floor, doing a little facing pushup towards the wall. Now we’re jumping up onto this roof.
Speaker 6 (07:19):
Oh, a ticker
Tyler Watkins (07:21):
Dude, I love, Ooh, I like that. Too bad. You
Matthew Souza (07:23):
Forgot it. What a Fran. Why does he just, Fran?
Sevan Matossian (07:27):
Hey, what about that too? What about that Fran? That Hiller
Tyler Watkins (07:30):
Published. Oh, that’s strict.
Matthew Souza (07:31):
Yeah. Theran awesome.
Tyler Watkins (07:33):
It was good. It was way harder than I thought it was going to be.
Sevan Matossian (07:36):
Derek Brinkman member for three months. The thumbnail looks like Taylor’s getting a prostate exam. Not looks like that is from Taylor’s
Speaker 6 (07:45):
Third prostate. I don’t think he can call it a prostate exam when it’s a penis
Tyler Watkins (07:48):
One two. Good
Sevan Matossian (07:49):
Point. Very good point.
Speaker 6 (07:51):
At least that’s what my doctor told me.
Sevan Matossian (07:53):
Why does he have the second line out there?
Tyler Watkins (07:57):
The far one or the close one
Matthew Souza (07:59):
Either. Well, this is playing both of ’em because one of them a starting
Speaker 6 (08:02):
Point. Your hands have to reach where he is now to He can finish the rep and his hands have to get back to the furthest away line before his feet drop off the wall or the rep doesn’t count.
Tyler Watkins (08:11):
His feet are getting wide, bro,
Sevan Matossian (08:13):
So I understand the one that’s close to the wall, I
Tyler Watkins (08:15):
Guess. Yeah,
Speaker 6 (08:18):
If the other one wasn’t there, you could just drop wherever you want it.
Tyler Watkins (08:21):
Yeah,
Sevan Matossian (08:22):
Right.
Tyler Watkins (08:24):
I think on these they should make the rule be like your chest touched the ground. I don’t really give a shit about how far you have to reach. Thank you. That always seemed weird to me. Thank you. You
Sevan Matossian (08:36):
Maybe we can get him to switch that.
Matthew Souza (08:38):
Yeah. Hey, outside of our stach workout, there hasn’t been very many barbells included in all these at the time. Has there Is Taylor afraid of a barbell? Why doesn’t he include par bills? I don’t think so. Is it not accessible? Is he trying to make it accessible to everybody?
Speaker 6 (08:51):
He’s so powerful. Look at the ease that he like. We’ll know now and I reckon when regular folks are calling in, you’ll realize how impressive these box drums are, but this looks so effortless.
Sevan Matossian (09:01):
Jeremy world. I’ve been triggered by the white lines. Next week we’ll use black lines and then yellow lines and then brown lines.
Matthew Souza (09:09):
I respect your feelings though, Jeremy. I’ll tell you that. I don’t. I die fucking. Hey, they’re valid here. They’re valid here. This is a safe space.
Sevan Matossian (09:17):
All lines are welcome. Hey, there’s a few multicolor lines. Oh, he should get taped. That’s the trans flag. Gay tape. 3 23. We see our first fucking
Matthew Souza (09:32):
Nellie. He’s breaking
Sevan Matossian (09:34):
Down. No, Taylor,
Matthew Souza (09:36):
Get your ass up, man.
Sevan Matossian (09:39):
So what’s the deal if your feet come off the wall, they have to be back on at
Matthew Souza (09:42):
The top. Oh, what was that?
Sevan Matossian (09:43):
I guess we don’t give a shit about your legs veering out, do we?
Speaker 6 (09:47):
It was never mentioned the standards.
Matthew Souza (09:49):
Fair enough. Oh wow. Nice wonder Taylor doing the first year college girl stance. I love
Sevan Matossian (09:55):
It. 3 49, 3 48. 3 48. Yeah. I wonder if when he spreads his legs like that, if you could smell his butt hole in the room.
Matthew Souza (10:03):
Oh, I could smell it from here in Livermore. Dude,
Speaker 6 (10:06):
He can smell it when he crosses his
Matthew Souza (10:07):
Legs. Smell it all the way at CFL.
Sevan Matossian (10:10):
Let’s pull the workout one more time. The workout today it was a wall walk to a handstand pushup, seven of those. Then you got to have some tape on the ground and then 14 box jumps to a 40 inch box and then seven of those wall things again. Or you got to do the wall walk and then the handstand. Pushup. Doesn’t matter how wide your feet go, I guess, and I think his foot came off the wall once or twice, but it was in contact with the wall at the top at the end of the rep when he is locked out. And then 14 more box jumps and then seven. So this only has 28 plus 2149 reps. Is this the fewest amount of reps we’ve ever had in a workout on Kill Taylor?
Speaker 6 (10:49):
Yeah,
Matthew Souza (10:51):
I think so. Yeah, I think so. Sure.
Sevan Matossian (10:52):
We’re going to go with it. Yeah, a hundred percent. Thank you. Thank, thank you.
Matthew Souza (10:56):
Confidence.
Sevan Matossian (10:57):
If you’re just tuning in and you want to have a body like Taylor’s bottom of the pyramid can get you there. Food is the way Fuck fitness food is. The way bottom of the pyramid will get you to the food consumption, quality, quantity and kind. That will get you the body that Taylor has and then you can add working out in later if you want. And also a crazy deal from Fit Aid. 40% off for the people on the show. Okay. If you would like a quick collection
Matthew Souza (11:29):
Though. Challenge. Sorry, one second. It’s actually better version Nutrition. Bottom of the pyramid is just their slogan, so it’s better version nutrition.com and the bottom of the pyramid is kind of their slogan on there. I didn’t You
Sevan Matossian (11:42):
Better fit that out. He better have gotten a Fit aid.
Matthew Souza (11:46):
I think he did. Did you see Aaron’s comment down here too? It looks like we just upped the ante on the pot.
Sevan Matossian (11:52):
Holy shit. And a free case of Fit Aid for anyone who challenges Taylor this week. Now listen. Listen, that is the CEO of fit aid right there, so that will happen. But I’m going to tell you this.
Matthew Souza (12:02):
You
Sevan Matossian (12:03):
Have to get us your name and address. We are not chasing you motherfuckers down
Matthew Souza (12:11):
And if they don’t, if you don’t, all of it goes to me.
Sevan Matossian (12:14):
All prizes are, you may or may not get the $1,500. You may or may not get the fit eight based on our ability to communicate with you. That’s the caveat, but that’s awesome. So free fit eight for everyone. Everyone who enters, all you have to do to enter is text me at 9 2 8 5 8 3 3 9 0 3 and then I will send you a link back. Oh look. Holy shit. Here we go. Here we go
Matthew Souza (12:40):
Already. Here we
Sevan Matossian (12:41):
Go. Oh, this guy’s competed against Taylor a few times. Wow.
Matthew Souza (12:44):
See, he should run. Wow. Is it Brandon? No. Brandon’s too heavy.
Sevan Matossian (12:50):
Oh my God. This is the most we’ve ever gotten
Matthew Souza (12:52):
Right away. That’s probably a bad sign. He screwed this one up, huh?
Sevan Matossian (13:00):
1500. We’ll hear from Taylor Self. Very well. Samuel Corina. Make sure you’re CEO level $20 a month member and then go to the video tab of the channel. Oh, listen, everyone should get a membership for this station. That’s just like a
Matthew Souza (13:14):
Regular Excel, not a triple xl. How long is he wearing the tight jeans? You think price is
Sevan Matossian (13:20):
Changing his ways?
Matthew Souza (13:23):
There
Sevan Matossian (13:23):
He is. There’s the body. There’s the man. He’s not racist. Contrary to what many people on the internet are saying today, it’s only Asians he hates. Hey,
Matthew Souza (13:34):
What’s up buddy?
Sevan Matossian (13:36):
In the hierarchy, he has blacks, browns, whites, and then Asians. Sorry, there’s
Matthew Souza (13:41):
Andy back there looking jacked.
Sevan Matossian (13:43):
There’s levels to this. Taylor’s doing the workout at CrossFit Charlotte this week and every week where he teaches where he practices his sentinel training program, where he vets the workouts. Also Sentinel training is absolutely exploding. Taylor is a freak. I speak to Taylor about four or five times a week on the phone and every time I call him I’m like, what are you doing? He’s like, I’m programming. Bryson and I are programming. I think it’s code
Matthew Souza (14:09):
For something.
Sevan Matossian (14:10):
I think it’s code for sniffing Cheerios.
Matthew Souza (14:13):
Yo, you
Sevan Matossian (14:15):
Just won yourself a free case of Fit eight Taylor.
Matthew Souza (14:18):
Nice work.
Sevan Matossian (14:19):
Oh shit,
Matthew Souza (14:21):
I’m probably getting beat this week by the
Sevan Matossian (14:23):
Wall.
Matthew Souza (14:23):
Hey, a wow. Oh yeah. How the fuck are you going to do this? I don’t see a chance, but I’m going to give it a go. Casey coming for the free case of Fit Aid.
Sevan Matossian (14:36):
Yeah, Casey, what is the plan? Is a wall walk with a Casey. Have you won the CrossFit games?
Matthew Souza (14:43):
Yeah, a couple times.
Sevan Matossian (14:45):
Awesome. Congratulations. What years did you win
Matthew Souza (14:47):
Badass? 21, 22, 23.
Sevan Matossian (14:50):
You’re a fucking beast. Why is your internet so good today? I’ve always wanted to have you on the show, but it seems to have been a problem.
Speaker 8 (14:55):
I’m leveling up. I’m tired of you talking
Sevan Matossian (14:57):
Shit about my internet. You want all the focus back on your arm, back on your stub, this internet fucking shit talking. Casey, what you’re going to do, by the way, also soon as we’re done here and you win the $1,500, text me your address because I’m going to push your address to Stua and then he’s going to try to get it to the Fit Aid people for your case of Fit aid.
Speaker 8 (15:20):
Oh sweet. Thanks dude.
Sevan Matossian (15:21):
Okay, but I mean 40% off, it might as well be free anyway. Yeah,
Speaker 8 (15:25):
That’s true.
Sevan Matossian (15:27):
Okay buddy. When’s the last time I take that? When’s the last time you did a wall walk?
Speaker 8 (15:33):
I’ve trained ’em quite a bit actually.
Sevan Matossian (15:35):
You have? Okay. And have they ever
Speaker 8 (15:36):
Been, it’s the wall facing handstand pushup. That’s tough, but we’re going to
Sevan Matossian (15:39):
Give it a roll. Okay, what do you do? You just put it on a box and try to make it level. Okay. By the way, standing next to Taylor right now is one of the fucking most OG people you’ll ever see in the CrossFit space. Andy Hendle from my early days. He was always there. Andy, what’s up dude? Hey, are you and Andy’s claim to fame back in the day he did a hundred overhead squats. I want to say did you do a 75 or 95? Andy?
Speaker 9 (16:13):
95 pounds. It was 95 pounds. That’s the workout on the main site?
Sevan Matossian (16:16):
Yeah. Yeah, that was, no,
Speaker 9 (16:19):
It was originally, it was 95 pounds for 75 reps and as few sets as possible, so I just did an extra 25 just to make sure.
Sevan Matossian (16:29):
Damn, that’s crazy. And Andy, you were running back for what? NFL team
Speaker 9 (16:36):
Linebacker. I was never a runningback. I was never that fast. I was a linebacker. So the way I describe a linebackers, you have to take on guys that are bigger than you and you have to catch guys that are faster than you.
Sevan Matossian (16:47):
And which team did you do that for?
Speaker 9 (16:49):
Well, I was in the USFL for a couple of years right out of college in 83 in Jacksonville, and then I was down with the Miami Dolphins
Sevan Matossian (16:58):
Because I remember seeing a picture of you drilling, A lot of people aren’t going to know who this is, but he was crazy famous when I was a kid drilling Eric Dickerson.
Speaker 9 (17:09):
Yeah. Also, I tell the story that there was a hole about three foot wide and it was just me and him and I missed him.
Sevan Matossian (17:20):
That’s how
Speaker 9 (17:21):
Good he’s
Sevan Matossian (17:23):
Hey with a story like that. I can’t believe you ever had a kid missing a three foot hole.
Speaker 9 (17:29):
Oh my gosh.
Sevan Matossian (17:36):
Oh my goodness.
Speaker 9 (17:38):
So
Sevan Matossian (17:38):
Listen, the Better Nutrition people, it’s 20% off right now for the better version Nutrition coaching. So if you hit the QR code at the bottom, not only will they lead you to the bottom of the pyramid will better version nutrition lead you to the bottom of the pyramid, but you’ll get 20% off. By the way, they have programs for everyone, so you can be one person if you’re an affiliate owner, you can bring ’em into your affiliate. They’ll run a program for you, a fantastic company. Okay, Casey, we are ready when you are, brother.
Speaker 8 (18:07):
Okay, give me one second.
Sevan Matossian (18:08):
Okay, sure.
Matthew Souza (18:09):
Good luck. Has one arm got He
Sevan Matossian (18:12):
Got a dump truck
Matthew Souza (18:13):
On him. Oh yeah, we got this from Lisa. This is what
Tyler Watkins (18:16):
Zevon and I do at the games. We’re like, look at that dude’s ass. That’s what we did entire time we
Matthew Souza (18:21):
Were at
Sevan Matossian (18:21):
Semi. Don’t tell him Tyler
Matthew Souza (18:23):
Lisa
Sevan Matossian (18:24):
Gall, one of my favorite people in the CrossFit space, a media guru. By the way, if you have any media needs, you should contact Lisa Gaul. She’s a G. Speaking of accessibility, adaptive CrossFit games tickets are now on sale. I believe that event will be September 19th to the 23rd over in San Antonio. The adaptive CrossFit Games tickets are on sale now. Search Wheel Wallet on Ticketmaster. They’ve chosen San Antonio, I think because I think that’s the hub also of where all the injured for the military go for their rehab. So they have shitloads of people there with missing pieces like Casey and so they’re going to do, the adaptive game is there this year and it’s going to be awesome. It’s a great location to hold the event.
Taylor Self (19:08):
This is crazy coincidental because just yesterday I texted Tyler Watkins after Jeopardy and I said, fuck Casey Acre.
Matthew Souza (19:16):
It is.
Sevan Matossian (19:18):
He heard you.
Matthew Souza (19:20):
Yeah,
Tyler Watkins (19:20):
I’m still red ased over it. This dude made me look like a jackass on that show.
Sevan Matossian (19:24):
Taylor, does he get any leeway? Does he get a no? No. Okay, fine.
Speaker 8 (19:29):
No, I don’t want any leeway, but I’m not going to beat him. I promise you that.
Sevan Matossian (19:32):
I know you don’t want any leeway.
Speaker 8 (19:34):
This is the first one. This is the first one that I can actually do the movement. So
Tyler Watkins (19:37):
You shot buddy
Sevan Matossian (19:38):
Shot. Anyway, we’re ready. We’re ready when you are. Caleb’s on the clock. We got a next contestant in the wings.
Matthew Souza (19:45):
Get out of the fucking way.
Taylor Self (19:47):
Maybe He does do a lot of box jumps.
Tyler Watkins (19:51):
His legs are fucking huge.
Taylor Self (19:53):
I would imagine if you can’t do a 100% upper body. Caleb, are
Sevan Matossian (19:57):
You ready?
Taylor Self (19:58):
We’re ready?
Matthew Souza (19:59):
Yeah. Do you want a
Taylor Self (20:00):
Ten second countdown?
Speaker 8 (20:02):
My clock has a ten second countdown. Just
Matthew Souza (20:05):
Say three. Give me a 3, 2, 1 and then we’ll go
Taylor Self (20:10):
10 seconds.
Matthew Souza (20:11):
Don’t count down from 10 like Ryson did, I guess. Space shuttle launch. Four
Sevan Matossian (20:17):
Three. Go ahead. Go.
Taylor Self (20:20):
One go
Sevan Matossian (20:21):
And we’re off. Here we go. A transit to CrossFit games champion.
Matthew Souza (20:25):
How
Taylor Self (20:26):
Do you feel about that? The towels of scale, bro. The towels failed.
Matthew Souza (20:30):
Oh no.
Taylor Self (20:31):
What are you talking about? Even that’s, that’s not level ground, bro.
Matthew Souza (20:35):
That’s level ground. He
Taylor Self (20:38):
Floor.
Sevan Matossian (20:39):
He’s got an eighth inch. Eighth inch advantage. Yeah, we’re
Tyler Watkins (20:41):
Going to bitch about the towel and not the fact
Matthew Souza (20:44):
Doesn’t.
Speaker 6 (20:48):
Oh shit. Where’s that list of adaptive? What is
Taylor Self (20:50):
BBL L
Speaker 6 (20:52):
Quotes that we need to say. This is so inspirational.
Matthew Souza (20:55):
Oh yeah. Somebody asked up buddy.
Taylor Self (20:59):
Somebody asked if he used his arm for his BBL.
Sevan Matossian (21:04):
What’s the BBL?
Taylor Self (21:06):
Hey Brandon S Shut the fuck up. I wouldn’t know anything about a Taiwanese whore. Dude, that disgusting racist comment of yours.
Sevan Matossian (21:14):
Wow. Taylor’s legs were spread further than a Taiwanese whore. Wow.
Matthew Souza (21:19):
But
Speaker 6 (21:19):
An American horse
Sevan Matossian (21:22):
Not. Let’s go Casey.
Taylor Self (21:24):
Tell me to lighten up. Ken, don’t ever tell to light
Sevan Matossian (21:29):
You off pace. You’re very off pace.
Taylor Self (21:33):
How long did the seven take me?
Tyler Watkins (21:34):
36 seconds. You were flying.
Sevan Matossian (21:39):
Yeah, you flying.
Matthew Souza (21:40):
I hope all these games athletes that I’ve talked to that said they’re going to do this show or watching this right now and are just sitting there just
Taylor Self (21:46):
Yeah, they’re not going to call in. They’re be like, oh, I could do this. They’re watching a guy with one arm and three legs do this workout. Meanwhile, they don’t have the ball
Matthew Souza (21:54):
Three legs.
Taylor Self (21:56):
His cock is hitting the box every time he jumps up there. Dude, I
Sevan Matossian (21:58):
Cannot. Yeah, look at that
Matthew Souza (21:59):
Sacrifice.
Tyler Watkins (22:00):
He can jump up there. I couldn’t even jump up
Matthew Souza (22:02):
There. He’s basically
Speaker 6 (22:04):
Doing ruck jumps with his dump truck as well.
Sevan Matossian (22:08):
Yeah, he should have had a fit aid.
Matthew Souza (22:10):
He’s on Pace
Taylor Self (22:12):
Lazar ju.
Sevan Matossian (22:15):
Look, he’s got a wristband and a elbow band.
Tyler Watkins (22:18):
Nice. Good job.
Taylor Self (22:20):
It does look like he fucking twerks or something. Like he would drop it, like he would throw it back on a dude.
Sevan Matossian (22:25):
Jesus. That thing is ridiculous.
Matthew Souza (22:27):
Why does it got to be a dude?
Taylor Self (22:31):
It looks like a dude. Looks like a dude who would throw it back on another dude’s type of butt.
Sevan Matossian (22:36):
Give the kid with the American flag shirt a case of fit aid. My goodness. Taylor. Oh, he’s chalking the nub. He’s chalking. The nub was Casey.
Taylor Self (22:46):
Hey, seven. Would you want him fist you with that?
Matthew Souza (22:52):
He was finished. You got it. You got him.
Taylor Self (22:55):
You got it. You got him. Reduction surgery. Ask him if he has a case of spina bifida or something for that ass. It’s got to fucking
Matthew Souza (23:04):
Lug him around. Reduction surgery. That was the lamest thing I ever said on this show.
Sevan Matossian (23:09):
Was
Tyler Watkins (23:10):
He born with the arm thing or was it an accident?
Taylor Self (23:13):
Was he born with the arm thing
Sevan Matossian (23:16):
Serious with the missing forearm and the missing hand? You’re talking about Tyler? Yeah. I’m going to guess he lost. Hey,
Taylor Self (23:22):
What’s up with this fucking, we asked
Matthew Souza (23:23):
Him, but his internet connection was so bad we couldn’t get the answer on that show.
Tyler Watkins (23:27):
Dude, come on
Sevan Matossian (23:28):
Casey. Go. He was fisting somebody.
Taylor Self (23:32):
He was fisting me and I pinched his arm off with my butt hole.
Sevan Matossian (23:35):
John Young three 16.
Matthew Souza (23:36):
He’s done. He’s done.
Taylor Self (23:41):
I got payback for you. Tyler, that’s payback for you. Whipping Tyler yesterday.
Matthew Souza (23:46):
Are you throwing your hands up in surrender?
Sevan Matossian (23:49):
That noble shirt probably reduced your testosterone by 50%.
Matthew Souza (23:53):
Send him a CO shirt. No, it’s cut off in. That’s a home cutoff too, so it adds a little about a hundred tests back.
Sevan Matossian (24:02):
Casey, see when you saw the workout? Did you know right away? Okay, fuck it. I’m trying This one.
Speaker 8 (24:08):
Yeah,
Sevan Matossian (24:09):
At eight 30 this morning when it went live you said, okay, I’m doing this.
Speaker 8 (24:12):
Yeah, I figured I might as well. The other weeks have had alternating snatches ring muscle ups, like shit that I technically can’t do that I know Taylor’s going to call me on.
Sevan Matossian (24:24):
Hey, where are you? What gym are you in?
Speaker 8 (24:27):
This is my gym in Decatur, Illinois.
Sevan Matossian (24:29):
You’re an affiliate owner?
Speaker 8 (24:31):
Not an affiliate. Just a one-on-one Gym.
Sevan Matossian (24:33):
Awesome, awesome, awesome, awesome. Were you born like that or did you lose the arm
Speaker 8 (24:39):
Born like it.
Sevan Matossian (24:40):
Alright. Woke and
Speaker 8 (24:41):
Woke up like this.
Sevan Matossian (24:45):
Is that normal? What is that? You just don’t have enough. There wasn’t enough chromosomes. There’s a chromosome. Do you have Down syndrome?
Matthew Souza (24:51):
Down syndrome? All his chromosomes went to his ass, dude. Yeah.
Taylor Self (24:58):
God buddy. Sell those shorts. I feel like if I was born like that by the time I was nine, I would want to know what it was like trying to masturbate with it. Did you ever,
Matthew Souza (25:12):
I can By the time you were nine yourself or someone else did.
Speaker 8 (25:15):
I can neither confirm nor deny.
Matthew Souza (25:17):
Right. Good
Sevan Matossian (25:19):
Challenges. That was the first thing the priest told him when he was trying to quit masturbating. Okay. You can only use
Matthew Souza (25:23):
The no bone shit.
Speaker 8 (25:25):
I did break my wrist once, so I’m sure you guys can only can imagine.
Matthew Souza (25:30):
No shit. You
Sevan Matossian (25:30):
Broke your wrist on your good arm.
Speaker 8 (25:32):
Yeah, I broke my wrist and my collarbone on my good arm.
Taylor Self (25:34):
Damn, that would be trying to suck my thing if that happened,
Matthew Souza (25:38):
Man. And the cantaloupe went from the fridge. Dude, it’s
Taylor Self (25:40):
Not that
Speaker 8 (25:41):
Taylor. No chance.
Matthew Souza (25:42):
Are you
Sevan Matossian (25:43):
Competing this year in San Antonio, brother? You
Speaker 8 (25:45):
Retired? No, I’m not actually.
Sevan Matossian (25:48):
And why is that?
Speaker 8 (25:50):
I coach high school football and so since it’s in September, I would miss three football games because we have freshmen, varsity and jv, so I didn’t want to leave the team with just all the unknown of what the season structure was going to look like and stuff. I didn’t want to commit to something that wasn’t going to work out. So this season I’m going to take off. I’ve got a lot of life changes going on here. I just got promoted with underdogs, so I’m taking on more responsibility with them.
Sevan Matossian (26:17):
You’re a coach over there?
Matthew Souza (26:19):
Yeah, the coach. Coach, bro.
Speaker 8 (26:21):
I’m a coach for Underdog, so I just took over Kiefer’s position since he just left to go to Proven. So yeah, just a lot of life changes going on. I’m closing my gym here in a few months, just making all kinds of life changes. So just a bunch of unexpected stuff that I didn’t know what my training and stuff was going to look like. So I’m taking this year off from competing and then hopefully they’ll schedule at a different time of year next year and I’ll be able to get back to it.
Taylor Self (26:48):
Do you have any choice words for Keefer? Like, fuck you maybe or
Speaker 8 (26:54):
If fucking
Speaker 6 (26:55):
Give me more money by leaving.
Speaker 8 (26:56):
Have nothing. No, no hard feelings for Keefer. I mean, it’s a great opportunity for him and me and Keith are good buddies and he’s helped me a lot over the last couple of years with underdogs, kind of learning about coaching elite athletes. So it’s all good. I get it.
Sevan Matossian (27:11):
Hold on one second. It’s the CEO of Fit Aid. Oh. They’re only going to send you half a case because you only have one hand to drink with. So you only,
Speaker 6 (27:20):
They’re pre, they’re preop to save.
Taylor Self (27:22):
They’re preop.
Speaker 8 (27:25):
Are they half drank? Screw top half. Are they half empty or half
Matthew Souza (27:29):
Transit? Half full. We’re a very positive show here. Nothing but positivity.
Sevan Matossian (27:34):
Casey, you the man. Stay in touch. Thanks guys. Is your internet good now? You can do podcast
Speaker 8 (27:40):
At? Yeah, I can do podcast now.
Sevan Matossian (27:41):
Okay. I’ll be reaching out very soon. And what’s the name of your football team that you’re coaching?
Speaker 8 (27:45):
Sangamon Valley High School.
Sevan Matossian (27:47):
Okay. Good luck this year, dude. You’re a beast.
Speaker 8 (27:49):
Thank you guys.
Sevan Matossian (27:49):
Appreciate it, man. Yep, love.
Tyler Watkins (27:52):
Thanks. No way. Savon. Remember Sangamon High School?
Sevan Matossian (27:56):
It was just the thought that counts. He
Matthew Souza (27:58):
Wrote it down. He wrote it down.
Sevan Matossian (28:00):
Send an extra case of Fit Aid to Casey for every person that fails to beat him.
Taylor Self (28:04):
Colton, where are you at?
Sevan Matossian (28:05):
Colton.
Tyler Watkins (28:06):
Hey, remember to ask if he played football.
Taylor Self (28:11):
He played quarterback.
Tyler Watkins (28:13):
Did he really?
Taylor Self (28:14):
No. Dumb dumbass. I
Tyler Watkins (28:15):
Mean,
Sevan Matossian (28:16):
Geez. Taylor. Taylor, here’s something I got to ask you. There were a couple times a couple reps where your feet came off the wall, but when you were locked out at the top, they were touching the wall. So I think, okay, so that’s fine. I don’t
Taylor Self (28:29):
Fucking know the, that movement’s never been in competition, so it’s whatever. I want it to be
Sevan Matossian (28:34):
Fine. Okay. Okay. Okay. Damn. Okay, we have another contestant for the $1,500.
Taylor Self (28:43):
I would assume that if they were to standardize it, it would only matter that your feet were on the wall at the finish of the rep
Sevan Matossian (28:49):
And they were. We have Josh from Don’t count the day. Make the day count. And you can do that. By the way, if you get on the better version Nutrition program, they will make it so you don’t have to count your macros. I think that is actually what Muhammad Ali said. I think they have the quote wrong. Better version. Nutrition will teach you how to get optimization out of your nutrition and your body without counting macros. Muhammad Ali.
Taylor Self (29:15):
Oh, guys, piss away. Josh.
Sevan Matossian (29:17):
Josh. What’s up buddy? Sideways,
Matthew Souza (29:19):
Josh. We need that phone sideways. By the way, was your first time on the show?
Sevan Matossian (29:22):
Fuck. We need you to just be there.
Matthew Souza (29:25):
Yeah. Where’s the obligatory girlfriend and wife to walk in front of the camera?
Sevan Matossian (29:28):
Beautiful. Jim ent.
Taylor Self (29:30):
Josh is going to walk in front of the camera with his pants around his ankles and his balls tucked between his ass. If I were calling into this show, I would goat everyone.
Speaker 6 (29:39):
I would hang up now
Tyler Watkins (29:40):
If I was in charge of this. We haven’t had any incidences yet. That’s a really good point. At
Taylor Self (29:47):
Point Oh, like that fucking one dude. That one dude on, what’s his name? The dude who has the NA video. Oh yeah. That me and Bryson. One day when we were programming.
The above transcript is generated using AI technology and therefore may contain errors.
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