Colten Mertens, Jack Farlow & Will Moorad | 2023 CrossFit Games Prep

Sevan Matossian (00:00):

Can you adapt to that?

Colten Mertens (00:02):

Yeah. Um, basically you just have to be out in the heat, um, and for a long time and your body adapts just like altitude. It’s very similar. Same thing. There’s actually been some studies that show, um, some fitness benefits too, similar to altitude training. Training. So yeah, I’ll be ready for Madison if it’s really hot out. It’s been, it’s been hot here pretty much all summer and I’m, I’m almost never in the AC except for at night, so I’m hoping it’s really hot, hot in Madison. That’s,

Sevan Matossian (00:34):

That’s the <laugh> did you say? I’m hoping it’s really hot in Madison.

Colten Mertens (00:39):


Sevan Matossian (00:40):

<laugh>. Yeah. I love it. Hey, do you drink a ton of that? Um, um, I got a bunch of that, uh, I forget what it’s called, but it’s the hydration stuff from, uh, swine. You drink a ton of that on days like this. Yeah.

Colten Mertens (00:55):


Sevan Matossian (00:56):

Yeah. Intra, yeah. Look at you. You even know the names. I, you know what I do? This is crazy. You probably have never done this, but I drink it. Um, uh, I make it hot so that I’ll drink less coffee. Really? So I put it in a hot Yeah, I’d put it in a hot cup of water. <laugh>. Yeah. And then just, and then just in one of these, no offense, Gabe. I drink plenty of coffee. I drink plenty of coffee. Hey, does that say Paver Street on it? Dang. Look at yours. Yeah. Wow, wow, wow. I like yours. Holy cow. Look at yours. It looks like it holds more coffee than mine. Hey guys, I’m sorry about the time. For

Colten Mertens (01:36):

Some reason for me, like, uh, 12.

Sevan Matossian (01:38):

So, sorry. Go ahead Colton. Go ahead.

Colten Mertens (01:43):

I’m just saying it holds about 12 ounces, maybe more.

Sevan Matossian (01:49):

I apologize. The show was scheduled for 7:00 AM when I sat down, it just got scheduled wrong. ’cause normally we start shows at 7:00 AM Pacific standard time, and this one started at six 15. So I, I screwed all you guys up, so I apologize. Thanks everyone for, uh, piling in now. Hey, so that’s the gym that you’re in right now, Colton.

Colten Mertens (02:15):

Gail, that’s like the unfinished half. So like, basically we’re finishing the house part right now, so we have all of our cabinets and countertops and appliances over there. So we haven’t been able to put plywood up, but like, pretty much everywhere else has the walls finished and things like that. Whiteboards, lifting platforms,

Sevan Matossian (02:36):

So all that stuff that you, like, all those appliances and stuff that, when it’s, those will all go inside, they’re just being stored there for now.

Colten Mertens (02:44):

Yeah. ’cause um, right now we’re painting the house. Once we get that done, we’ll do the flooring and tile and then put the cabinets in. So, uh, we just need to have everything outta the house right now. So we’re storing it over here. But like that portion over there will be where all the like, bikes, rowers, and cardio equipment will go. And then on this wall in front of me, we’re gonna build, like, um, I got the dimensions and everything laid out. It’s gonna be 14 feet long, 12 feet high, and six feet off the wall. So, um, hopefully before too long, after August, we’ll get done.

Sevan Matossian (03:22):

Crazy. Will only you and, uh, your girlfriend train there? Or will anyone else train there?

Colten Mertens (03:30):

Most of the time it’s just gonna be Allison and I, but, um, we’ll definitely have people over, like if they wanna come out and train, but like day to day it’ll just be her and her and I,

Sevan Matossian (03:39):


Colten Mertens (03:39):

About that 1200 square feet. So we’ll have plenty of space to train.

Sevan Matossian (03:43):

Yeah, dude, that’s huge. Hey, it looks great in the videos too. Are you gonna leave it all like with that rough look? The plywood look? Or will you put um, uh, sheet rock on there? I really like the plywood look.

Colten Mertens (03:55):

I think we’re gonna stick a plywood. Yeah, yeah. I don’t think we’re gonna paint it or put anything else on it. Mm-hmm. <affirmative>.

Sevan Matossian (04:00):

Yeah, it looks cool.

Colten Mertens (04:01):

Yeah, it looks nice. Like with all the black equipment and everything, especially too in black windows, it just makes it pop really well.

Sevan Matossian (04:09):

And then that’s just the big old garage door that opens up.

Colten Mertens (04:15):

Yeah. Yeah. 16 feet wide. It was supposed to be 12 feet tall, but, um, and they were framing it in, they messed up and framed it in for a 10 foot door and didn’t wanna redo, redo it, so I was told ’em, it’s fine. We don’t necessarily need a 12 foot door

Sevan Matossian (04:35):

By, um, 12 feet. You mean 12 feet? 12 feet wide,

Colten Mertens (04:41):

Uh, 12 feet tall.

Sevan Matossian (04:42):

Oh, that’s 10 feet right there.

Colten Mertens (04:44):

Mm-hmm. <affirmative>.

Sevan Matossian (04:46):


Colten Mertens (04:46):


Sevan Matossian (04:47):

Yeah, that’s, that’s

Colten Mertens (04:48):

High. Yeah. And out front we have a, we have a 30 by 10 foot cement pad out front to do, like, if we wanna bring equipment outdoors and do training out there, which is really nice for this time of year. ’cause you want to get used to being out in the sun and the heat since, you know, two thirds of the events or so are gonna be outside.

Sevan Matossian (05:09):

Um, Colton, do you ever, um, experience like, uh, heat exhaustion or close to heat stroke or any heat issues when you’re training there?

Colten Mertens (05:18):

<laugh>? Yeah, like pretty much every day when I’m done with training, I’ll have a pretty bad headache just from being outside in the heat all day. Um, yeah. Wears on you. It’s uh, it’s like energy drain as well, but, um, it prepares you for Madison. I think some guys show up and they’re not ready for the heat. Um, like you see that every year and, um, you know, for me, I’m kind of un inside ’cause I don’t have any air conditioning to train in. And, um, you know, like I’m working on the house, there’s no ac I’m working on the farm. There’s no ac so the hotter the better for me. Hopefully it’s really hot.

Sevan Matossian (05:54):

Hey, do the dudes you work with wear cowboy hats?

Colten Mertens (06:00):

<laugh>? No.

Sevan Matossian (06:01):

Nobody. No.

Colten Mertens (06:02):

You get in front of, if you wear a cowboy hat.

Sevan Matossian (06:04):

Oh, really?

Colten Mertens (06:05):


Sevan Matossian (06:06):

Your dad doesn’t even wear one.

Colten Mertens (06:08):

It’s a, it’s all like a, a baseball cap. <laugh>? No.

Sevan Matossian (06:11):

Oh man. Wears like

Colten Mertens (06:12):

A base. A John Deere baseball cap. You see a lot of that. Yeah. <laugh>,

Sevan Matossian (06:17):

Uh, Allegra. Good morning. Uh, good morning. Nothing but respect for the athletes, like Mertons and Vellner that make it to the games year in, year out, while maintaining a full-time job. Yeah. Crazy. Uh, I don’t think, uh, Colton, uh, does Colton drink Lmm n t or anything? Assaulter mineral minerals. My husband works outside and started drinking this, and it’s a game changer. You do the Wolverine stuff, right?

Colten Mertens (06:44):

Yeah. But yeah, for anybody who doesn’t take any kind of salt or electrolyte supplements, it’s definitely something to look into, especially if you’re outside at all or if you’re sweating during your workouts, it’s a, you’ll probably notice a huge difference in your energy and how you feel afterwards. Hydration is not just like water. Hydration is, it’s a balance of, you know, water, uh, potassium, sodium, magnesium, chloride, and cal in your, in your body. So finding a supplement, electrolyte supplement that has all those things, um, it’s gonna help you out a lot, not just water.

Sevan Matossian (07:19):

Yeah, I, I, uh, Allegra, or No? Who said it? Uh oh. Elisa Lisa. I take, I drink the intra stuff too. Um, especially on, on fasting days, I’ll have some, and after every workout I’ll drink some that, it’s like a, just, you get it from Wolverine, it’s just a scoop. I put it in the water. I like it. And, and I, and it is a game changer for me, especially on my fasting days. It’s crazy. Um, so tastes really good

Colten Mertens (07:44):


Sevan Matossian (07:45):

H how, how’s you, uh, how’s your, um, how, how, how’s the body? How, how are, are you fired up? You ready to go? You ready to attack?

Colten Mertens (07:53):

Yeah. Um, body’s starting to feel pretty good. Uh, I think last year I came into the games, uh, pretty overtrained added in too much volume and my training leading up and just didn’t taper correctly. But I changed some things this year and, um, you know, approaching it more like I did semi-finals and, um, you know, my body feels like it’s really getting to that point to where my strength is peaking, my fitness is peaking. All those things are trying to feel really good. Um, and now we’re kind of into the taper phase, so we’re just like pulling back on volume a little bit more, making sure that, you know, any nagging injuries or things like that, or that’s now the main focus. We’re, um, you know, usually like the day to day training, if you have something that hurt you just kind of work around it and work through it.


But, um, now the focus is not so much on increasing fitness, but just getting your body feeling good and ready to perform. I, I’ve had a knee injury for a little while now. I don’t really know what’s going on with it, but, um, you know, I was injured, but I, and it’s still, um, can be painful a lot. Really painful at times, but it’s definitely getting better. Inflammation feels like it’s going down. Um, so I haven’t been able to do as much running in my prep as I usually do, but I’m still getting in quite a bit. Um, just been doing like, a lot more swimming and biking, things like that. But, um, yeah, like right before semis I was having a really hard time even squatting below parallel. Um, but it’s feeling a lot better now. So that’ll, that makes a huge difference when you’re doing like, um, near max effort, squat cleans and cleaning jerks and things like that.

Sevan Matossian (09:33):

Ha. Have you had it looked at? It’s

Colten Mertens (09:34):

Doing a lot better than it has been.

Sevan Matossian (09:37):

Have you had it looked at?

Colten Mertens (09:38):

I don’t really do doctors unless have to. No.

Sevan Matossian (09:43):

Uh ha. So no one’s looked at it? What’s what? I probably won’t, what’s Allison say? What’s Allison say?

Colten Mertens (09:53):

Um, not much about it really. I haven’t, I don’t talk to her about it a whole lot. Um, I don’t really talk to anybody about it a whole lot. Just kinda like something that you deal with and I feel like bringing it up a lot makes it, um, just kinda like, makes it worse mentally if you’re talking about it all the time and being negative about it. And, um, I kind of have this theory where it’s like, I’m sure you like, um, people with kids know, like if your kid, let’s say they’re running and they trip and fall, they might look up and look over at their parent. If the parent runs over, they might start crying, but the, if the parents like, Hey, you’re fine, walk it off. And they just get up and go like they base, like they, um, the severity of how bad their hurt is based on what the parent looks like. Mm-hmm. And I think that, um, it’s kind of a similar concept with your body. Like if you are just like, yeah, it’s not really that bad, I’m not gonna dwell on it, your body is kinda like, oh yeah, it really ain’t that bad. And you just keep on going on and your body fixes itself for most things eventually. So, I mean, it’s getting better.

Sevan Matossian (10:58):

So your knee is like a little kid, just, Hey, shake it off, shake it off, walk it off.

Colten Mertens (11:05):

Mm-hmm. <affirmative>.

Sevan Matossian (11:06):

Yeah. Hey, do you feel the knee every day?

Colten Mertens (11:07):

It’ll keep getting better.

Sevan Matossian (11:11):

Do you feel it every day? Mm-hmm. <affirmative>. Oh, okay. Yeah, I will, we will reconvene a after, um, uh, Justin d uh, behind the scenes pump for Colton to get some crazy screen time. Me too. Me too. Look it, he’s out in the sun too. Uh, Wyatt. Uh, Begay Gay, uh, sound sounds like Avon is courting, uh, Wolverine. Hey dude, I support anyone who supports, uh, the dudes that I support. A hundred percent. I mean, I got, I I got the stuff because Wolverine’s good stuff because, uh, of Colton. And who else is Wolverine? Uh, is is Gza Wolverine? No, she’s to Spacer. What is, is she Yeah,

Colten Mertens (11:53):

Alex Gaza. <laugh>. Yeah, she’s Wolverine and, um, Abby.

Sevan Matossian (12:01):

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Abby. I had her on the show

Colten Mertens (12:03):


Sevan Matossian (12:04):


Colten Mertens (12:05):

Mm-hmm. <affirmative>

Sevan Matossian (12:07):

Abby, the model. Alex Gza, the bench presser and Colton Mertons. Mm-hmm.

Colten Mertens (12:12):


Sevan Matossian (12:13):

Wolverine. And, and Oh, sorry. And Savon. Matian. I’ll put my name on there too. So, <laugh> Wolverine, uh, what are you gonna show up at? Uh, Colton. Um, how, how much will you weigh when you show up and, and is the goal, what will happen to your body, um, from uh, Sunday to or from, uh, Thursday to Sunday? What’s the plan? Do you have a plan for it?

Colten Mertens (12:39):

Of course, I’ve got a plan. Okay. I’ve always got a plan. Good. Um, I’ll show up like mid to low, like one eighties. Um, I’ve been about five pounds lighter than I usually am for the past, I don’t know, four months or so. And I’ll probably just maintain that up to the games. And then the goal when I’m there, it’ll be, um, I’ll probably leave the games about the same that I weigh when I’m come in. I probably won’t gain weight. I know Frazier has said in the past in his interviews as he would make it a point to try and gain weight at the games to make sure he’s not undereating. But, um, I find if I do that, I’ll, I’ll feel very sluggish. Um, so I like to generally, like when I’m training and working all day, I’ll keep my meals a little bit lighter, then get my calories in at night. But, um, you know, I’ll spread it out throughout the day. Um, get in quite a few liquid calories probably, but, um, I’ll probably leave it the same way they come in at just try and maintain, don’t wanna overeat or undereat.

Sevan Matossian (13:36):

Yeah. I, I always, I mean, shit, I’m no games athlete, but I always thought that, hey, if you lose a couple pounds during the games, no problem. I mean, that’s what you’re doing. You’re exerting and everyone who finishes a no one finishes the winner of every single marathon finishes dehydrated. Like no one finishes the marathon. There’s never been a winner who finishes mm-hmm. <affirmative> and he’s hydrated.

Colten Mertens (13:59):

Yeah. It’s just hard to replace, um, that weight you’re losing through sweating as quickly as you’re losing it in real time. So, I mean, it’s really important when you’re all done to get in your dehydration and your calories, your protein and carbs. But, um, yeah, I’d say if anybody’s losing weight at the games, they’re not losing necessarily like, pounds of fat in three or four days. It’s just they’re not disciplined with their deep, with their hydration or they don’t understand their hydration very well.

Sevan Matossian (14:27):

Uh, Tony Merton’s or, or Anthony, as some of you know him, his knee hurts because it’s a weenie because it’s a weenie or he’s a weenie. Oh, because Colton’s a weenie or is he’s a weenie. Hey, speaking of weenie, speaking of Weenies Colton, um, are you regretting the whole dog business now? Who’s going to, um, who’s gonna watch the dog? No, sorry, sorry. Dogs <laugh>.

Colten Mertens (14:58):

Um, I don’t know. It’ll be either my dad or my brother. We’ll see. Um, I’ll tell ’em both just in case one of them forgets. But, um, yeah, we got, we just got their new pin built over here at the new house, so yeah, they’re loving it out there, chasing birds and everything. But, uh, yeah, we have these big, we have these huge like food containers, so we won’t have to worry about food for the whole week. We’re gone. Had to refill their water each day.

Sevan Matossian (15:26):

So this, this opening shot here is a, this is a tractor?

Colten Mertens (15:34):

Mm-hmm. <affirmative>? Yeah. John Deere front row tractor. Mm-hmm.

Sevan Matossian (15:38):

<affirmative>. And that’s carrying the a dog house?

Colten Mertens (15:43):

Yeah, the dog house is huge. It’s, um, <laugh> weighs a lot. Uh, we have to move it with a tractor. Mm-hmm. <affirmative>,

Sevan Matossian (15:51):

Did you make that or did you build, or did you buy that

Colten Mertens (15:55):


Colten Mertens (15:58):

Yeah. Um, my dad, Allie and I made that at the farm

Sevan Matossian (16:02):

And, and, and <laugh>. And it’s, and when you made it, it’s designed to, it’s designed to move around to like stick like the forklift in it and move it.

Colten Mertens (16:13):

Yeah. So it’s on some four by six pieces of wood. So you can just slide the forks in from the tractor underneath of it and you have to wrap, um, a strap around it, and then you can just pick it on up and move it.

Sevan Matossian (16:25):

And this black spot right here, this is the entry.

Colten Mertens (16:28):

Yeah. It gets way too heavy to like actually move. Yeah. That’s their little dog door. And then on the, on the side they got a, we have a big door so we can get in there and like change their bedding and, uh, we used to keep their food and water in there until they moved them over to the new place. But now they have a, it’s an old horse barn, so we just keep the food and water in there. Yeah. That big green thing.

Sevan Matossian (16:49):

Yeah. They got a good ass life. That area’s huge.

Colten Mertens (16:56):

Yeah, it’s pretty big. We used to be an alfalfa field right there. So we’re gonna get it all skidded down, hopefully this fall. Give them some nice grass growing

Colten Mertens (17:05):


Sevan Matossian (17:06):

Hey, is that your dad hat? <laugh>? Yeah. What did he say? Bullshit. Yeah. <laugh>. <laugh>. Uh, hey, you, you, are you sensing some like parenting coming out? Like you’re, you’re treating them like your kids and stuff, right? You and Ally, you’re kind of, it’s, I think it’s called the nesting stage or something. <laugh>, me and my wife did that for like 15 years. Yeah. We just had a dog and it was absurd how we took care of it. Mm-hmm.

Colten Mertens (17:30):


Colten Mertens (17:32):

Yeah. Yeah. We try and take good care of ’em. Um, we do breed ’em, but we don’t raise ’em like we’re breeders, you know, they’re our pets and we also kind of breed ’em as kind of how, how we look at it. So I wanna make sure that they’re taken care of as if they’re pets. You know, they come inside and sleep in our bedroom every night. Not in our bed, but they have a crate down below. And, um, um, once we get the house built, we’re looking at ’em. They have these kind of big, like dog crates. They’re also like TV stands. I don’t know if you’ve seen them. No. We’re gonna get one of them. It’s probably where they’re sleep at night. Once we get the new house in,

Sevan Matossian (18:07):

They’re kind of cool. Hey, I, um, be careful. I think like dog

Colten Mertens (18:10):


Sevan Matossian (18:12):

I think like one of the top reasons like kids die at home is ’cause TVs fall on ’em. Flat screens fall on the kid <laugh>. And, and now, and now you, you’re you’re doing a, uh, you’re doing a combo. Colton Merton’s TV dog, crate, <laugh>.

Colten Mertens (18:28):

They could definitely get squished by it. They’re a little, but, um, yeah, they’ll be enclosed underneath of it so they’ll be protected when they’re in there at least.

Sevan Matossian (18:35):

Hey, are you gonna innovate? Are you gonna get outside the um, uh, the dog space too? Like dog accessories? Will there be a Colton Merton’s TV stand dog crate? God, that’s a good idea.

Colten Mertens (18:50):

Um, I have talked to Vindicated a little bit actually about, uh, starting out some shirts. Eventually told him, I talked to him more about after the games. We’re kind of looking at doing some merten SUNY weenie shirts maybe. So we’ll see. We got that kind of

Sevan Matossian (19:06):

Colton that’s not in a t-shirt’s not innovating.

Colten Mertens (19:11):

I know, but I only got so much time. I can’t go out there producing furniture now. <laugh>.

Sevan Matossian (19:17):

Hey, uh, how much is a dog? How, how much does it cost to buy a dog? Does Ally cry when, um, uh, when you sell ’em

Colten Mertens (19:25):

<laugh>? No, but it is kind of, um, it is kind of sad ’cause you, you wait till at least eight weeks old to sell ’em. So that’s kind of when they’re about five weeks old is when they start to really like, walk around and move and like, develop personalities. So it’s kind of like they’re just getting to where it feels like they’re part of the like dog pack and then they have to go out. But, um, uh, you sell ’em, we usually, uh, Dotson, depending on the time of year, um, you’ll see ’em go anywhere from like 900, a thousand to, there’s some that sell for 4,000.

Sevan Matossian (20:00):

So we just kind no kid. Uh, what time of year does the price go up? Yeah,

Colten Mertens (20:05):

We, we winter, winter is in its highest. Summer is usually the lowest.

Sevan Matossian (20:13):


Colten Mertens (20:13):

Come? It’s usually a pretty big difference too. Just like, um, like typically people are like a lot more active in the summer. They’re out and vacationing and doing all kinds of things like that. So they don’t want to bring in a new puppy and deal with that while they’re doing all those kinds of things. Going to, you know, the lake on the weekends or going on a vacation. Um, but wintertime, things like personally in people’s lives slow down a lot. So they, that’s when it’s kind of more convenient for them to get a puppy.

Sevan Matossian (20:45):

Hey, that’s the whole dog industry like that. I had no idea.

Colten Mertens (20:50):

Mm-hmm. <affirmative>

Sevan Matossian (20:52):

All dogs. Yeah.

Colten Mertens (20:53):

Every dog will be, yeah. Mm-hmm. <affirmative>

Sevan Matossian (20:57):

Shit. Okay, so buy your dog in the uh, in the summer. God, he’s cute.

Colten Mertens (21:05):

Yeah. That one. Is

Sevan Matossian (21:05):

That taken with a boomer? iPhone. iPhone?

Colten Mertens (21:09):

Mm-hmm. <affirmative>. Yep.

Sevan Matossian (21:13):

Portrait mode

Colten Mertens (21:14):

Boomer. He um, sold him. Yeah. Sold him to a friend from Cedar Falls who we met at CrossFit. Kevo a long time ago.

Sevan Matossian (21:24):

Dang. He’s Hey, have you ever, um, yeah, he cute. Kept any that you weren’t supposed to keep

Colten Mertens (21:31):

<laugh>. I haven’t, but my dad’s done that for like, I remember growing up, we, we’ve always had dogs and every once in a while you’d have, um, a litter, a puppies or like my uncle would have dogs or whatever, things like that. And almost every time he’s like, first he’s like, yeah, we’re not keeping any of these. I don’t want any more dogs. And then he always, um, gets attached to one and we always end up keeping it.

Sevan Matossian (21:57):

So your dad’s kind soft. He’s soft

Colten Mertens (22:01):

When it comes to puppies. Yeah. He loves puppies.

Sevan Matossian (22:04):

Is that why he, so is your gym built on his property?

Colten Mertens (22:10):

Uh, it used to be his property. Yeah. Mm-hmm. <affirmative>.

Sevan Matossian (22:13):

So he, oh, so he is soft. He let you take over his property? He is soft.

Colten Mertens (22:20):

He wants me to stick around.

Sevan Matossian (22:22):

Alright, dad,

Colten Mertens (22:23):

Take care of pigs.

Sevan Matossian (22:25):

Uh, Justin. V I like this Matossian like for toe spacers, Matossian. Where are my toe spacers? Oh, they’re on,

Colten Mertens (22:34):

You have toe spacers.

Sevan Matossian (22:36):

Oh dude, I love these things.

Colten Mertens (22:39):

Okay. Yeah, I got some. I love

Sevan Matossian (22:40):

These things. Work

Colten Mertens (22:41):

Boots. I got some work boots that are like, they’re really wide and flat. It’s supposed to be good for your toes. And, um, it’s crazy, the difference, like if you wear those all day and then put on like a different normal shoe, you can tell how like cramped your toes feel. But yeah, I was thinking about getting my management team to reach out to toe spacers after the games. I think that’d be cool to work with them.

Sevan Matossian (23:07):

Oh dude. They’re also,

Colten Mertens (23:07):

I have a list that I wanna reach out to.

Sevan Matossian (23:11):

Say it again.

Colten Mertens (23:15):

I have a list of companies I want to get reached out to after the games. So if we even get the training full-time,

Sevan Matossian (23:22):

Like the products that you’re interested in got a

Colten Mertens (23:23):

Plan. Yeah. The products, the companies different, um, different like genres within the fitness space that I don’t have con sponsors for currently. Different things like that. Mm-hmm. <affirmative>,

Sevan Matossian (23:36):

Hey. That’s why the nano two ruined all of their shoes for me because I started wearing the nano two. It has so much room for the, the front of your foot. And then I switched to other shoes and my toes feel just like, I don’t understand how there should ever, you know, the nano two is shaped, like it gets wider as it goes to the front, but all other shoes, like if you look at the Nike Metcon, it goes narrow as it goes to the front. Like a, like a rock climbing shoe. And I, I don’t understand the point of that.

Colten Mertens (24:03):

I think it’s just consumer, um, demand. For a long time people felt like they had a snug fit. Like especially for fitness and running. That’s how I was for a long time too. Like I felt like I wanted my shoes to be tight and not like go over, didn’t want my feet to my shoes. Right. But, um, now I’m definitely kind of the opposite. Like I want that more space. Like the, the tier lifters have a lot of, they’re like, they’re like that they have a big toe box. So you have plenty of room,

Sevan Matossian (24:34):

Heather. Yeah. But

Colten Mertens (24:35):

That just came from just consumer demand and now it’s changing.

Sevan Matossian (24:39):

Oh good. There’s still, still so many people out there with little pin or feet. Heather Cahe. I couldn’t sell any. I would have a house full of weenies.

Colten Mertens (24:52):

Yeah, they’re cute.

Sevan Matossian (24:54):

Um, do you always have a pup for sale or do people have to wait?

Colten Mertens (25:00):

Um, so right now we don’t have any litters. Um, we’re looking at having our next litter sometime this winter. It just kinda depends on when this’s come and heat and, um, yeah, just had to, they had to wait for the dogs to come and heat and then once they get pregnant, it’s two months until they have the puppies and then two months until they can sell ’em. So once they come and heat it’s a four month process. So we’re like four months out at least from having any litters available for sale or at least people they can go to the new home.

Sevan Matossian (25:31):

So you determine that you don’t just look out like when this show’s over, you won’t look out one of those windows and be like, oh my God, they’re fucking, those two are bone and we got Oh yes. And then like, and do you reward them when they’re boning so that you encourage boning? You know what I mean? Like, if your dog’s barking, you throw out a treat, you’re like, good boy. Yeah. If you see them boning, do you reward them?

Colten Mertens (25:50):

No. ’cause um, actually we’ve been trying to keep them from doing that the last, this last heat cycle. ’cause we wanted our, like you can breed ’em, um, when they’re like a year old or even younger, like physically they can do it and they will do it if you let them. We wanted some of our females to get a little bit older and more, more mature before they had their first litter. Um, so we were trying to separate ’em. And we also were waiting to get our d n a testing done for all the dogs. So we took swabs of their saliva and sent it in to Embark and they run a huge d n a test on, on the chest for a bunch of genetic markers to determine if they’re gonna be passing on any significant, like, um, health risks to their puppies. And, um, those results all came back clear. So we were kind of waiting for the dogs to mature and to get the results back before had any more litters yet, but, um, hopefully this winter rock some puppies. Ready.

Sevan Matossian (26:48):

How, how many women do you have? Female dogs? We got,

Colten Mertens (26:52):

We got four. We got Mabel, Millie, Martha and Margot.

Sevan Matossian (26:57):

And they’re all, and they all will have puppies. They’re the PU ones.

Colten Mertens (27:00):

Mm-hmm. <affirmative>.

Sevan Matossian (27:01):

And then how many say it again?

Colten Mertens (27:04):

Yeah, hopefully Marg. One of them that we got, um, was like a really, really small runt when we got her. So we’re not sure, um, how well she’ll do if she has puppies, but we’ll see.

Sevan Matossian (27:16):

Hey, is that good? Because people want really small weenies, like you want to like breed two runts so you can get like a really tiny weenie.

Colten Mertens (27:23):

Yeah. People do like that. It’s just, um, sometimes when they’re a runt it seems like this, like she might have had some problems developing when she was a small puppy before we got her. Sometimes that, um, can cause issues with their fertility. So she might end up just being a pet, but hopefully we can breed her at some point.

Sevan Matossian (27:43):

We’ll see. Dude, I had this, um, girlfriend, not, not for very long, for like, maybe like three weeks. I really liked her and, um, I don’t know. I wanna say I was 19 or 20 and she was a little over six feet tall.

Colten Mertens (27:56):


Sevan Matossian (27:57):

And she told me she liked me because I reminded her of one of those little tiny jam jars.

Colten Mertens (28:03):


Sevan Matossian (28:03):

Yeah. Mm-hmm. <affirmative>. Yeah. I bet you she has, she’s probably gonna buy one of your dogs someday.

Colten Mertens (28:10):

Three weeks. Um, that just seems like a weird, I’m time to date for someone.

Sevan Matossian (28:15):

I think she got over, I think she got over the novelty. I think I was a novelty. Uh,

Colten Mertens (28:19):


Sevan Matossian (28:20):

You know what I mean? Like a, like a, like a, a novelty boyfriend sucked. I see. Yeah, she broke my heart. I was just a little jam jar to her. Uh, Zoe Harwood, whenever I see comments like this, I always laugh. ’cause I always imagine the person typing this out. Dick butter, can you get a dick spacer? Like, she thought, like, she thought she was so clever. What, let’s see, did he respond? Did dick butter respond? Uh, no. Geez. Oh, look at Dick Butter does have a question for you. Uh, Colton, did any of the dogs have serial killers in their lineage? Geez.

Colten Mertens (28:55):

Um, so you mean like, are they from like Mongolia and, uh, like a Genghis Kong ancestry?

Sevan Matossian (29:04):

I guess? I think

Colten Mertens (29:05):

Otis, um,

Sevan Matossian (29:07):

Is that really where they’re from?

Colten Mertens (29:09):

Um, some of ’em like, um, you could see on the d n A test, it’ll show you like their mother’s lineage and their father’s lineage and where they think it originated from. I think our, our male, I don’t remember if it’s his mother or his father was, uh, the lineage goes back to Asia, so maybe.

Sevan Matossian (29:27):

Wow. Uh, so so that breed’s been around forever. The the little one?

Colten Mertens (29:33):

Yeah. They originated in, um, Germany. Um, Dotson, the German word, it means badger hound. So they bred them to hunt badgers. That’s why they’re long and have really short legs. So they get into the burrows and chase out badgers.

Sevan Matossian (29:49):

Oh shit. Are they tough like that? Mm-hmm. <affirmative>, are they still tough like that or not <laugh>?

Colten Mertens (29:53):

Uh, not really. No. Um, I don’t know. They, they act like they are, but, um, pretty much the only hunting they do here.

The above transcript is generated using AI technology and therefore may contain errors.

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