Sevan Matossian (00:00):
I don’t know. That’s a little strong. Bam. We’re live. I think that’s a little strong, Mr. Weed. I think that’s a little strong. A little strong. Bam. We’re live. Good morning. Take it. This show just lost all of its monetization too. I understand. It’s fine. What am I gonna do? I wanted to play this song. I stayed up, I stayed up for 45 minutes later than I should have, uh, yesterday, last night because I was just listening to old songs. I cannot get in the habit of starting to play songs that’s gonna fuck up my whole account. Who’s gonna pay for, uh, jujitsu classes?
(00:44):
I, it’s not the, it’s not YouTube. Carla. Hi, savvy darling. Hi. How are you? Nice to see you. Uh, worth it. All right, fine. Cool. That’s what you say. Till my kids are fucking, I’m boiling socks and they’re drinking sock broth. Um, did Hiller sing that to you? Give fair question. Definitely a fair question. When he was rubbing my arms, just picture this. It was me and Hiller on my skate ramp. He’s shirtless. My sleeve is rolled up. He has his legs open. I’m kind of sitting between them. He tells me to go get the oil. I go get the oil. I forget what I got. Coconut oil.
(01:27):
I think it was coconut oil. And he had a butter knife and he rubbed on my arm and then he cupped my arm. And we just sat there in the hot sun Pride month with Sevy and Hiller. Big old juiced up, veiny dude rubbing oil on my arms. We should have FaceTimed Alexis to referee that shit. Um, it’s confirmed. Savon is gay. Uh, good morning, Frank. What’s up, dude? Uh, Savon. I’m with my mother-in-law. Don’t get me hard. Fine. Understood. Okay, sorry. It happens. The truth is, is that’s basically who you’re gonna be banging and 25 years anyway. You know what I mean? You know what I mean? You know what I mean? Cevy is doing his part in celebrating Pride Month.
(02:16):
Man, what a joke. Pride Month is, what a fucking joke. I was looking at this morning, chalk up article that a thousand of you sent me. And when I mean a thousand, I mean like 10. Um, it’s, it’s, it’s crazy. It’s just another perfect example of, of a, a group of people just hurting themselves. Can you imagine claiming that doing a, uh, throwing a sex, a party that celebrates the sexualization a sex party at your gym? They’re saying that that’s inclusive. It’s fucking, they, I think they talk about it when it’s not Pride Month. Cuz it just seems like I’m attacking people for their sexuality. But it has nothing to do with that.
(03:04):
Do you guys know that nothing is ever free. Like if you go somewhere and the education’s free, do you know what that means? That means you’re not getting educated. You guys know that, right? There’s nothing free. The teachers aren’t doing it for free. Someone’s always paying for something. The hamburgers, the free hamburgers you got, if you got the injection in New York City, you know that they’re not really free. Right? You know, if you believe something that’s free, that’s like, that’s the part where you go in your head. That’s the god part. That’s the gender part. Free that word free does ev Everyone knows that, right? God’s real gender’s, real things are free. Those are all in the same bucket. Does everyone know that?
(03:43):
Those are just liar’s words? Those are just to trick you that there’s nothing like that. You didn’t get a free education. I’m cheer. I’m cheery. I’m cheery. I’m cool. I’m, I’m, I’m cool. I’m Chm. I’m I’m a Jake’s like, oh no. Oh no. Seven needs cheer. I’m, I’m, I’m good. I’m good. I’m good. I’m good. I’m good. I was gonna play this song this morning. I might as well. I was telling Su yesterday, I was like, fuck, I, I guess if I’m gonna play one song, I might as well play a shitload of songs. I was gonna play this song too. This song’s good, right? I like this. Love
Speaker 2 (04:20):
Is a many splendid thing. Love. Lift us up where we belong. All you need is love. Please don’t start that again.
Sevan Matossian (04:27):
Oh, oh yeah. Oh yeah. My favorite, uh, uh, shooter mcg Gavin, thanks for helping the situation. Free Healthcare, right? <laugh>, right. Healthcare is so good in Canada and the UK Holy shit song. How’d they even do this? Has everyone here heard this? You know how they do this? They just mix a bunch of songs up together. It’s so,
(05:41):
Are you really in a Gold’s Gym, Audrey, that would be fucking awesome. Send me photo, please. That’s so cool. If you’re really in a Gold’s Gym, God, those were the good old days. I used to love going to a Globo gym. I hate musicals. Really? You do hate musicals? They’re cool. Oh, she works there. Heidi. No shit. Excuse me. Crazy. I had no idea. I still think Audrey lives in. That was weird. Uh, hey, uh, God, do you remember what, I guess maybe some of you still are so young, but do you remember when, when just how passionate you were as a kid? Like if I liked the girl at school, I would write her name just like 5,000 times during the day. I would turn off everything else. I’d just be writing her name. I’d fill my whole binder up with her name, block letters, curse of letters. I was fucking God. I was passionate.
(07:17):
You’d go outta your way to walk by their room. You know what I mean? Like, they, like, you know that they’re in J Hall, room seven. Your class is in D Hall and you go the long way to hopefully get a glimpse of them. Just a glimpse. Just a glimpse. Can I just see you? Oh my God. I don’t even wanna be at school today. I don’t think you’re here. I just want to go home. Hey, my boobs. Me too. Uh, I no, no doubt. Let’s, uh, I’d rather listen to Jake Chapman’s mom. Talk about getting pegged. That’s alright. It’s fine. Me too. Shooter Mc Gavin. We had one hall. Oh, that’s awesome.
(08:18):
Can can you work? Audrey says she had to put on her headphones so these people don’t hear Stevon talking about caulk and both. Um, I just always look at your butt crack when, whenever, uh, I click on your name. Hey, um, you can work at Gold Gym and walk around with headphones on. Can you really do that? No, probably not. Probably not a good time to unmute. Not for another 90 minutes. Uh, she, she’s, uh, she’s the pegger and not the Peggie. Who’s she? Peg your mother-in-law. Pegs dudes. And how do you know that? Oh wow. Sema. She’s a manager. She can do whatever she wants. Wow. That’s awesome.
(09:20):
All right. We got the music out of the way. We demonetize the show already. I’m sure Susie will be very happy about that. I’ll be getting a call shortly. Just gonna just cruise. I’m just gonna cruise today. Just fucking cruising. Fuck it. I’m just cruising. Whatever. Just cruising. Uh, uh, Dan Azarian writes in the comments before I even show you the video. Only thing surprising this video is the victim wasn’t Asian or white. Which, which is not true because, uh, as we know, uh, melanated people are the one people that do not discriminate. This is a guy in a subway. First of all, you have to know, once again, like I tell you all the time, this is normal. This is not an outlier situation. This is 100% normal. This is the society that a bunch of people think it’s okay to live in. You ready? Okay, so there’s a guy just yelling on the subway, and then he jumps in the air, his feet are off the ground, and he drops an elbow on another man’s head who’s sleeping? That man’s wearing a mask, by the way, so he doesn’t catch covid. And this man just, just dropped an elbow on his head.
(10:37):
Crazy. No one does a thing.
(10:42):
So you’re telling me that it’s not okay at that point to run behind the man in the red jacket and put him in a rear naked choke and put him to sleep. And if he dies, he dies. And the person who who put him in the rear naked choke, um, is not a hero. I disagree. Just straight up. I disagree. Just straight up. If that, if that guy, I think soon as someone does that, I think, uh, anyone should be able to run up to him, put him in a rear naked choke. And if he dies, he dies. Yeah, I feel the exact. Where’s Derek Chauvin when needed? I couldn’t agree more. And I think Derek Chauvin, to be honest with you, I well, you guys already know this a hundred percent. He, he did nothing wrong. Zero, zero wrong. You ask a police officer to enter a situation that’s highly volatile with someone who’s known to point of a gun at a woman’s pregnant stomach, does home invasions.
(11:30):
It’s just third fucking arrest. Uh, being high on fentanyl, high on meth and high on alcohol driving. And you pull ’em out of the car and he’s screaming and going wild in the crowd around you is talking shit to you. At that point, it’s um, game on. I have no, I have no sorry. All I need to do is be like that guy right there on the ground, that guy right there with his neck. You know what’s so funny too? Is the, I I, correct me if I’m wrong, but the whole George Freud thing, the reason why it’s so fucked up is it’s this black people. So there’s two reasons Black people see that. And they start to empathize and they start to imagine they’re George Floyd, right? I fully get that.
(12:09):
I fully get that. I fuck you do not understand how much I get that I live that day to day. I have to fucking keep my eyes down sometimes so that I don’t start to fucking imagine I’m certain people or start going into some sort of weird empathy game. And so when I see this, I just imagine that guy who just got elbowed in the head. I don’t look at him and see, uh, is that guy black? I don’t look at him and see that’s a black guy. I think right away. That’s me, my mom, my sister, my kids. The list goes on of people that I would die for.
(13:02):
I wanna know, I wanna know this. This one’s really gonna bug some people. Not you guys though. Cuz I live in an echo chamber. Uh, the, the, you know, during the Super Bowl, there’s like this, uh, uh, leap of, uh, uh, wife beatings. Do you know that? Do you know that, um, that statistic, uh, TV sales go up, wife beatings go up. Like there’s this, um, uh, the chip sales go up. There’s like this, uh, d u I arrest go up. There’s this, like, this whole thing, because of the nature of the Super Bowl event and what people think that they should do around it. The drinking, the partying, the intoxication, the drugs, whatever certain, certain other behaviors are exacerbated. I wonder what the spread of venereal diseases are during pride month.
(13:50):
I wonder what the, um, I wonder what the increase on Juneteenth is of, uh, black on black, uh, shooting. Fucking, some people would be like, Avon. You can’t ask that. The fuck, I can’t. You can. You we’re gonna have those stats about, uh, the Superbowl. Let’s have ’em about everything. Let’s let freedom. Okay. Uh, subway, uh, I, I have no tolerance for, um, doing that to people. I did take my third injection last night and actually af uh, yesterday. Yesterday I paused. I was watching the, um, the new documentary that comes out. I think it comes out tomorrow. Oh, you guys just wanna just rail on fucking the CrossFit games media team? Wow. The cross. Wow. CrossFit is so sloppy. Did, did you guys know Tomorrow a documentary comes out? Did you know tomorrow a fucking documentary comes out. I, to see a sneak peek at it, someone sent me the, uh, a link with a, a code and I got to watch it yesterday.
(14:58):
I took a pause during the middle to shoot up my third shot of peptides. The movie’s fucking great. I walked away absolutely loving Tia and Ricky Gerard loving them. But you have no idea that that movie comes out because CrossFit obviously someone over there. I can’t wait to ask Mariah this. Someone must hate her exactly what documentary. Yeah, cuz they fucking hate her. Someone must hate her the same way. Someone must hate Chase. Someone over there hates Chase. Ingram hates Don Fall. Well, clearly, well actually, well let, let we’ll circle back around Anyway, I just wanna let you know I did take my third shot yesterday, and that was the first time taking the shot. Like for 15 minutes after I took the shot, I felt like bruised a little bit. Um, Hiller told me I should be putting the shots like within a one inch area. Just so you know, though, there’s no marks. That’s how tiny the needle is.
(15:51):
The first time, I think I just went in the muscle and the next two times I think I, whatever wire is in there, I think I fucking hit that wire. I tried to hit it. 75 people were shot, uh, over the Juneteenth weekend, but that’s gotta be just a normal, um, weekend. Then how long before results? Well, I, who knows, but it, it can’t be anytime soon. But yesterday I did the most pull-ups I’ve done in probably five months. I did, um, I rode the assault bike for 20 calories and I did three pull-ups, 10 rounds. I got in 30 pull-ups. I can’t even fucking believe it. I did all the grips. Actually, I did chest, strict chest tobar to, if you want me to be completely honest, I did this grip, this grip, I did the split grips. Is that what you call those split grips?
(16:46):
Um, I don’t know. God, I sound like an idiot, right? By saying Matt Burns wants to know if it’s pain free. I don’t know. I can’t, I guess, yes, I guess the answer is yes. I, I can’t tell if I’m a pussy. I’m gonna just say I’m a pussy. I, I feel like there’s something in there that’s a switch grip. Okay, thank you. Thank you. A turntable and turntable and Jonathan Ortega or mixed grip. Okay. No, not t r t. What do you think? I am? I’m a good boy. These are peptides. I put peptides BPC 1 57. Uh, you can get them on, um, uh, California Peptides. Here’s the website. This is my sponsor. This one right here, Calif. I got two bottles of that. I’m three injections gins on one bottle. Dude, there’s so much fluid in one bottle. It’s fucking crazy. I don’t even know if I’m gonna make it to the second bottle. I need more water. There’s this special water they send you and I, and I think I used too much of it in the first, the first, what do they call it? You, you basically, there’s powder in, in this bo in, in one bottle, and you take this special clean water and you put it in, in with the powder, and then you gently mix it. And then that’s, and then that’s what you shoot for like the next four weeks or whatever. I don’t know how long.
(18:08):
I’m not enjoying shooting it every day. I thought I would enjoy this process. I wish there was like cocaine version of peptides that I could just snort. I’m glad when it’s done. Oh, that, that’s what it is. Bacteria. Bacteria. Static water. Not related to Cheerios, bacteria, static water. Actually, I don’t know if it’s not related to Cheerios. Uh, Christine Young. Nice. I did 75 chest bar, but not strict. Nice. Yesterday. Good job. Matt Burns. We know you’re a pussy, but yeah, so I can’t tell. Uh, reconstitute the water. Yeah. You, you, you read at the, uh, you read at the, uh, constitution. I mean, I don’t even, who ca I don’t even like that word reconstitute. I don’t wanna learn that word. You’re taking the powder and you’re mixing it the same way you would, uh, just gently with some the bacterial, uh, cheerio static water. And uh, then you inject it and it’s easy and then, and it, it’s easy.
(19:09):
And I saw, I saw Huberman that they, uh, the Stanford, um, guy who does all the podcasts, he’s on Rogan all the time. I saw him say he injected that shit into his back and his ruptured disc got better. And I was like, fuck, I’m game, uh, hello Sarah. Okay, yeah, I’ll try this, please. And she’s like, I’m gonna charge you double for being such a shitty fucking representation of my first fucking sponsorship. You never even did t r t. I’m like, I’m so sorry. She said, get with the program, you little bitch. I was like, all right, sorry.
(19:42):
Holy shit. Careful. S I ended up with a flesh sheeting bacteria from injecting BPC 1 57 and 2019 went septic. My god. Uh, Heidi, I don’t understand how to get my chest up there. Oh God, why does that turn me on a little bit? It’s weird. I just, that split grip for sure. I mean, with the split grip, it’s almost like you can’t not do chest the bar. I, I almost can’t not do chest a bar. I almost, I have kind of the opposite problem. Steven Flores, I talked to my dad yesterday, 60 years of age and told him to get on T R T R T if he wants. You didn’t tell your dad shit. Your dad shot a load in your mom and made you, you didn’t tell him shit. If he wants Steven, you didn’t tell your dad shit. Your dad told you your dad made you pull higher mason. That is fucking for a guy who’s usually so articulate. That’s your fucking advice to fucking Heidi. Pull higher. You can pull. How about pull lower? That’s fucking horrible. Fucking, that’s a horrible cue. Oh, Matt Burns, Shawn Mason Mitchell up with, uh, some cues for, uh, Heidi Krum. Drive your elbows down and back just gifted with crazy lots and I can do whatever.
(21:26):
Okay? Uh, okay, here we go. Okay, we did this, we did the, we did the, we’re queer. We’re here. We’re coming for your children. We know that we, we don’t want anyone coming for our children, right? We already, we established that yesterday. Good. We’re queer. We’re here. We’re coming for your children. We’re queer. Oh, listen to this. Listen to this. So this is good. Uh, today, so tomorrow I’m having Mariah Moron, the director of, uh, the 2022 CrossFit Games documentary, which I saw, which I absolutely loved it, loved it, absolutely loved it. Uh, and in two hours, this is, this is on the CrossFit podcast. Live in two hours. So what time would that be? Nine 30.
(22:28):
It looks like either Adrian Conway or Chase Ingram is going to interview. It’s funny. They call it CrossFits Coordinating producer and filmmaker. Tyson Roy. He’s the executive producer of this film, though. The Fittest on Earth Retroactive. And so he, this is the, this is the, he will be on the CrossFit podcast, but this is like one of the only promotions they have had. It’s funny, they’re promoting, they’re promoting the po CrossFit games, is promoting the podcast on their least popular platform. Dude, this show that I’m doing right now will get three times as many downloads. If it’s, if it does horribly, then the CrossFit podcast has subscribers and that’s where they’re promoting this movie. They’re probably like, uh, chase, we hate, okay, so we hate Chase, we hate Mariah. Let’s let’s promote them together on one of our shit platforms at some point, how does Don not know this is going on? Does anyone, is everyone just afraid? No one wants to tell Don anything? Adam Fer being interviewed by Adrian Conway. Um, 528 views in a month. Jesus crimey. I, anyway, uh, I’m gonna watch that live in two hours. I’m gonna, I I actually probably won’t, uh, watch it. I’ll probably listen to it. I used to work with Tyson, Tyson, uh, and I did the CrossFit podcast together. Actually, he produced the CrossFit podcast.
(24:27):
I worked with him for a long fucking time, long fucking time when they, when they fired everyone, um, the first, the, in 2018, I’m pretty sure Tyson got fired. And I did everything in my power to manipulate bag, anything I fucking could to get him hired back. And then eventually he got hired back. Um, I, I should tell, sorry, I missed this. I’m not sure that I should tell Don that they hate, um, that I, I, I don’t wanna say what I have and haven’t told him, but there’s only so much I can say without I start to feel like it’s just a dickhead. Uh, Matt, Matt Burns, um, uh, se pull up your dm. I just sent you a clip of, uh, SF Men’s Gay Choir singing. We Are Coming For Your Children. Yeah, I’ve heard it. To be honest, it’s so fucking disturbing. It’s so disturbing.
(25:41):
And what’s crazy is, is if you say it’s disturbing, someone might say that you’re homophobic when there’s nothing more. I’d rather do than fucking be a part of that fucking choir and sing in that choir. I just don’t wanna be, have anything to do with their disgusting message. No one in their right mind is wants to go after anyone’s children at all for anything. Oh, I didn’t, did I even pull this up? Did I share this screen? Sorry. Shit, I’ve been just sitting here talking about it. Did I pull it up? Sorry. Here it is. Movie preview CrossFit games documentary retroactive with Tyson Roy. I wish I knew who was, uh, interviewing
(26:29):
Everything out there so fucking bad. It’s like someone will say something and, and let’s say about climate change and people will just accept the presupposition that what they’re saying is real. No one will be like, well, uh, 20 years ago, one, the trademarks for climate change, one of the cornerstones of the argument was the emotional appeal that polar bears have decreased in population or almost extinct. And here we are in 2024, and polar bears have increased from 5,000 to 30,000. Um, how does that comport with the climate change? Well, I’m glad you asked that because actually, um, it has nothing to do with, uh, climate change is still real and the planet is still, uh, suffering under, um, uh, the mass pollution and driving of SUVs. Uh, the only reason why polar bears have increased in the numbers is because of laws that prohibit them from hunting. Wow. Fascinating. This is a great discussion. Thank you. None of that. Idiot Central. Hi.
Mattew Souza (27:26):
Good morning.
Sevan Matossian (27:27):
Hi,
Mattew Souza (27:28):
How are you?
Sevan Matossian (27:30):
Hi.
Speaker 4 (27:31):
Hi.
Sevan Matossian (27:41):
Nice to see you.
Mattew Souza (27:42):
Good to see you.
Sevan Matossian (27:47):
Oh, okay. So, so the they got we’re and so we’re having, so Chase is having Mariah on today. Oh, I’m gonna send you, I can send you the, the notes. Susan’s here. Fuck, this is cool.
Mattew Souza (27:57):
Yeah, send ’em over.
Sevan Matossian (27:59):
Get so excited. Okay. Hold on. Select all. Copy compose paste. That’s who’s a, I just so you know, I always send ’em to Caleb too. Not you. I know. You know that Matt.
Mattew Souza (28:11):
Yeah.
Sevan Matossian (28:16):
Weekends.
Mattew Souza (28:19):
What were you talking about before
Sevan Matossian (28:21):
There could be a holiday ce, did you watch Nicole Carroll and Craigs Howard podcast? No, I’m gonna listen to that today too. I can’t wait. I kind of had her scheduled to come on and I was kind of scared to have her on. And then we went back and forth and like if you, she said she would come on, but she at a later date. And then, and then, and then I waited and then I waited another six months and asked her on again. And then she said, yeah. And then we, we, I just started getting, I didn’t follow up. It’s my fault. I’m kind of scared to have her on the same way. I was kind of the, like, normally when I have rich on, I’m so super, well, I’m always super excited to have Rich on, but like, I don’t want to, um, when I say scared, I wanna be, make sure I’m extra courteous. Do you know what I mean? It’s, scared might not be the right word, but it’s like when you have someone over and you wanna make sure your house is clean, like, so yeah. You just wanna make sure your house is clean,
Mattew Souza (29:24):
Make sure it’s all tidied and you put your best foot forward.
Sevan Matossian (29:26):
Yeah, exactly. Thank you. Are
Mattew Souza (29:28):
You also afraid, is it weird when you have like a lot of hi, like history in, in the sense of like, you know each other pretty well? So like some of the questions you’re kind of like dancing around a little bit?
Sevan Matossian (29:37):
Yeah, there’s for sure a fakeness. Yeah. Not in a bad way though. I’m comfortable with that kind of fakeness, but, but there’s a fake Yeah, A dance. A dance. Yeah. A dance. Yeah.
Mattew Souza (29:47):
You haven’t, have you seen, uh, the episode yet? You just said you didn’t see
Sevan Matossian (29:50):
It yet. No, I haven’t seen it, but I saw a clip from it and I really wanna see it. Um, someone said, uh, wait, where’s uh, CK Kevin, um, Nicole would be awesome. Do it. You be mail. The thing is, is I wish.
The above transcript is generated using AI technology and therefore may contain errors.
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