#808 – The Morning Show w/ Sevan Matossian

Sevan Matossian (00:00):

Why they stop. They stop being responsive after a couple hours. Bam. We’re live. Good morning. They think good morning. They woke up on the wrong side of the bed. Jeremy j Jeremy eat World. Tom Geron, clock cutter. Jeffrey Birchfield vindicate. Jesus Louise. Hit the like button softly says Spiegel. Someone sent a, um, an email to the savan podcast email saying they had to stop listening to the show because my phone was too loud and I need to turn my phone off during the show. I, I don’t, I hardly ever hear my phone during the show.

Caleb Beaver (00:55):

I can only remember one show that you had your phone going off consistently and it was because of that one chat.

Sevan Matossian (01:01):

Oh, is that recently?

Caleb Beaver (01:03):

Yeah, it was like two days ago, three days ago.

Sevan Matossian (01:07):

Uh, Jake Chapman, Bruce Wayne Devesh Clark Cutter, uh, an American teen invites a pure blooded Australian Sheila to a prom in San Francisco. I don’t think there are any pure blooded, uh, Australians anymore. They got ’em all. I’m reading this book. It’s called The Moth in the, the the Moth and in the moth in the iron lung. Sounds like a lame excuse. Seven. What’s a lame excuse? Oh, yeah. To not watch a show. Oh, on that guy’s part. I don’t know what that I, I dunno. Hi, Paulina. Good morning. Uh, good morning to my Holy Spirit. A God and Sev. Thank you. Cheers. Is that Lifton A Tea? Kermit drinking

Caleb Beaver (02:07):

<laugh>. Yeah, it’s Lifton.

Sevan Matossian (02:15):

Hi Drew. How are you? Welcome. So I, I, aye, aye, I’m reading this book. It’s called The Moth, uh, the Moth and the Iron Long. I have three hours left in it. Oh, do I just let you guys know I was lying. I’m not reading it. I’m listening to it.


And I think where the book is going, I’ll keep updating you. I’m gonna get this, this, uh, author on so we can talk to him. But I think where the book is going is in 1890, it was required by law, by the US government for all farmland to be sprayed with arsenic and lead. That was the pesticide that was used, and that was done for many, many years to get rid of moths, especially this moth called the, I think it’s called the gypsum moth that came from Europe. And at some point there were so many moths in the streets of Vermont that when you walked down the street, you would slip and fall bec because there were so many of them. There were so many of them that you would go to bed at night and then you’d wake up in the morning and your trees would be completely deleted, meaning def defo, all the foliage would be eaten off of them. And then the mods would’ve start coming into your house. Sorry, the Caterpillars, it was a massive, massive problem. It was consuming all the food, all the, uh, all the crops. Yep.


Those guys, God, we have those like crazy in California. And, and so they started spraying everything with this arsenic and lead. And this arsenic and lead was, uh, killing a lot of people. Uh, there started being arsenic poisoning, uh, that was happening to children. And like any good company, this arsenic and lead pesticide company hired doctors and lawyers to do studies saying that it wasn’t the arsenic and the lead that was killing the kids. Sound familiar. <laugh>. Uh, but, but what ended up happening is there was such a large consumption of arsenic and lead that it started weakening. The gut biome started weakening. The immune system started, uh, making it so that people, I don’t know if it’s called leaky gut or what, but basically there’s this process when you eat food that the food as it passes through your digestive tract, it’s blocked from your bloodstream.


And so your digestive tract, your stomach, your intestines, all that shit kills all the bacterias and bad shit in there. That’s why they, and, and in the book, they use an example, if you ate tetanus, you don’t get tetanus. Tetanus has to be put directly into the bloodstream for you to get it, which is very hard to get. You basically have to step on some sort of like rusty nail or some shit like that. And so what they’re suggesting is that polio had been around in this book, they’re suggesting polio had been around fucking forever. But what was happening is because there was so much arsenic and lead in our food supply that it weakened the large intestine and people were basically getting their, uh, their intestine was basically leaking into their bloodstream. And one of the manifestations of that was a disease called polio. Polio colitis, getting into your blood bloodstream and giving you polio.


And, and, and, and that, and it looks like the book’s gonna say that the sanitation issue was just to totally misunderstood. And the irony of all of that is that’s exactly what happened with Covid 19. Right. They thought they thought it was covid killing them, but all of us know that it wasn’t. It was the fact that you’re addicted to refined carbohydrates because you have fucking idiots out there selling snicker bars thinking it’s cute and, and cans of Sprite, the little kids, a little sugar is okay. A little bit of heroin is okay. You say that. It, it, it’s, it might be true, but you, but, but you make a living off of that during a pandemic where in, in the pandemic not being, um, uh, COVID 19, but the pandemic being the epidemic of, uh, mass consumption of sugar, sugar addicts everywhere. And uh, next thing you know, um, you are, you are blaming the symptom, which is the death by covid. You’re, you’re, that’s the symptom. But, but it’s not the cause. The cause is just poor diet. And the cause wasn’t polio that was killing people. It was the fact that the food supply had been compromised by arsenic and lead. And, and you can see this story. I can’t, there was a bunch of stories during the beginning of Covid that I would point out that were just like this. The homeless issue is exactly the same. It’s not a homeless issue. It’s the fact that people have chosen to do drugs over getting shelter.


Uh, Savon have you se you seen the nasal polio vax was shown to be giving p Yeah, the, well, I do know this Matt Burns. I do know that the, the stuff that I’ve been reading about polio recently, I thought I heard a phone vibrating. The, the stuff I’ve been reading about polio recently is that the largest, the most number of cases, maybe the only number of cases, the only cases of polio on the planet are caused by the, uh, drug to prevent it rather than actual polio. So yeah. Yeah. Greg had polio. Hopefully someday he’ll tell that story, uh, because it is an interesting story. Uh, he, he was probably one of the last people ever to get it. He’s definitely gotta be. He, he was at the fucking tail end of it. I don’t know any other people alive who have it. So there, anyway, I’ll keep telling you about the book. It was, the book was recommended to me at dinner by, um, one of the speaker’s wives, William Brigg’s wife. We went out, I went out to dinner with one of the speakers from Broken Science and his wife and, and a bunch of other people were there. And the wife’s like, oh, you gotta read this book.


What’s the show about today, Dick? And it’s about Dick and Dykes. I was thinking more about that, that lady who told the guy wearing my shirt that I was, um, homophobic. What does that word mean? Homophobic. Maybe I am homophobic. I I Does that mean that I I don’t want to be, um, anally penetrated because a person with dis No. Well, I do have prejudice against gay. What’s prejudice mean? There’s, I I, I I extra like gay people. That’s the part that’s fucked up. A preconceived opinion. That’s not based on reason or fact. No, no, no. I’m not prejudice. Well, you tell me. Are you g Caleb? Pretend like you’re gay.

Caleb Beaver (09:29):

Hi, Savon.

Sevan Matossian (09:31):

<laugh>. Um, do you like, uh, uh, penis?

Caleb Beaver (09:35):


Sevan Matossian (09:36):

Okay, well then I’m not Thank you. Appreciate you doing that for me then. Uh, I don’t have any, I’m prejudiced, but it’s not, uh, it’s not a bit, it’s not based on, uh, preconceived opinion that is not based on re Well, it’s based on reason. I just assume that my prejudice towards gay people is that if you have a penis, you like a penis. If you have a vagina, you like a vagina and that you really don’t want the other genitalia around you. Oh, hold, let me do one more question to Caleb. Caleb, get back in. Character. Ready? Uh, Caleb, do you like, uh, do you want, um, uh, I know this hot shake that wants to sit on your face too, can’t she?

Caleb Beaver (10:10):

No. Thank you.

Sevan Matossian (10:11):

We’ll see there. <laugh>. I thank you. I appreciate it. Now you can go back to tell your wife, I’m sorry,

Caleb Beaver (10:17):


Sevan Matossian (10:19):

Uh, okay, well there you go. Se you got that hoodie from the Dave Matthews concert. Why is it cuz it’s like a, uh, is that like, cuz it’s acid wash. This is, I got this from, um, what’s the guy’s name who was on the show last night? J or Howell?

Caleb Beaver (10:36):

James. James Howell.

Sevan Matossian (10:38):

Yeah, James Howell sent it to me and some hats for my kids. Uh, wow. Already an Oscar from Paper Street Coffee,

Caleb Beaver (10:46):


Caleb Beaver (10:48):

Oh, it gets better. Don’t worry. Gabe.

Sevan Matossian (10:49):

Good morning, Gabe. Paper Street Coffee. I’m out. I’m out. Gabe, what? Everything I have left is in the grinder. Send us send, uh, regular and decaf, uh, pronto please. And anyone else who wants coffee, please go to, uh, paper Street Coffee. Don’t spell out street. Just put it s t and uh, use the code word Savon and you get a fat discount. Cheer. Yeah. Cheers. Hey, I wonder what that, what, there should be some really harsh word for people who accuse you of shit falsely.

Caleb Beaver (11:28):

Isn’t that, isn’t there a word for that?

Sevan Matossian (11:31):

I don’t know. It should, should be

Caleb Beaver (11:32):

Slander or I guess it’s not really a

Sevan Matossian (11:34):

Harsh word. I want a word. Like, like bigot Or, or, or come Guzzler.

Caleb Beaver (11:41):

<laugh>. Do sch nozzle.

Sevan Matossian (11:43):

Just, I, no, that’s a kind of a fun word. If I call someone a douche nozzle, it’s kind of a compliment. It just, if what, what? It’s so fucking annoying that you would think that that shirt is anti, uh, gay. So lame

Caleb Beaver (12:04):

Ship eggs. That’s a good one.

Sevan Matossian (12:05):

Yeah. Oh, good morning, Hugh. Oh, is that a Polish name? Hugh asl. Oh, smear Merchant. Wow. Clock cutter. That’s nice.

Caleb Beaver (12:17):

Oh, I like that.

Sevan Matossian (12:20):

That is nice. Good morning, Rosie.

Caleb Beaver (12:27):

Jesus. Heidi

Caleb Beaver (12:28):


Sevan Matossian (12:29):

Boom. Huge fan of the armpit. Uh, okay. Uh, regular and Oh, uh, Scott Schweitzer in the house, a regular and decaf. Gabe has like eight kinds of regular

Caleb Beaver (12:47):

That’s a very good point.

Sevan Matossian (12:52):

Um, Caleb, before we get all crazy, I want to do 4 46. And, um, you were, I I want you to, this is kind of long. You can skip through it if you want, but I want you to watch this video with us and tell us, um, you can even maybe skip, I think it’s two minutes. You can even skip to the middle.

Caleb Beaver (13:12):

I don’t think I can do that with this one.

Sevan Matossian (13:14):

Oh, all right. Um, but this, this chick right here, Emily,

Caleb Beaver (13:21):


Sevan Matossian (13:22):

She, I think she wants to be like in, in, in a one arm category for the CrossFit games. What’s that called? Is there, there’s a one like

Caleb Beaver (13:31):

Of her Body Adaptive.

Sevan Matossian (13:33):

Okay, let’s just say that. And they won’t give it to her. I really like looking at her, her fucked up, uh, little arm by the way, when she shows it, like I didn’t even expect it.

Caleb Beaver (13:47):


Sevan Matossian (13:47):

Okay. I’m such, I’m such a weirdo, but for some reason I like looking at it, it’s like flutamide babies. I can’t stop staring at that <laugh>, that thing. I have so many questions about what it can and can’t do and she kind of gets into it, into this, what her, but anyway, I, I digress. That was my own, uh, weird fixation. But, but tell me in your professional opinion, should she be in the one arm category? Like with the Oh, upper body. One point. Maybe Scott saying step, this isn’t Laura, this is some girl, other girl. I forget Emily with the nice eyes in, in the, in the kind of, I I give it. Well, I’m not gonna tell you what I’m, I’m gonna stay unbiased. I’m not, I don’t wanna bias you.

Caleb Beaver (14:28):


Sevan Matossian (14:29):

Okay. But she’s pissed cuz she got some sort of rejection letter from CrossFit saying like, you’re not tared enough.

Caleb Beaver (14:36):

All right.

Speaker 4 (14:38):

So I woke up to the most dismissive emails ever from CrossFit. Um, me asking how I appeal this clearly I was asking, you know, is can I apply through a different category or like, how do I go about this? Cause I clearly have a impairment. Um, I can pause

Sevan Matossian (14:56):

The response. Sorry. So she’s bummed, right?

Caleb Beaver (15:00):

Yeah, it’s a, I, hmm. I don’t really like when people are like, this is the most worst thing ever.

Sevan Matossian (15:06):

<laugh>. I’m like, I know, I’m

Caleb Beaver (15:09):


Sevan Matossian (15:09):

See, I, I wish she wasn’t so dramatic. I want to tell you, I I dinged her some points for that too. I, I agree. Okay. It’s like, Hey, hey dude, look at you. You’re fucking hot and you don’t have any acne. Like, life’s good. Just chill. Yeah. It’s like, fuck. What if you were elephant man, but go on. You’re right. I know I and you’re young. It’s like, dude, I’ll be, I’ll take your shit. You wanna be fitty <laugh>, like, exactly. I know, but let’s give her a break. Here we go. All

Caleb Beaver (15:34):

Right. All right. Alright.

Speaker 4 (15:35):

This, so we’re basically just like, good luck. You don’t qualify. Know, like, if you feel you fit into a different category, this is how you go about it. This is what you do. Like, I’m sorry, but I definitely have an impairment. Have

Speaker 5 (15:49):

You Look at my arm. Let’s start with

Sevan Matossian (15:52):

Look at. Look at. Isn’t that amazing? She’s not faking that. Right? She’s not like tucking one shoulder or something. That shit, that shit on the right is fucking, something’s wrong with it.

Caleb Beaver (16:02):

Yeah, you can, there’s definitely like not as much muscle tone. It’s smaller.

Sevan Matossian (16:07):

How about her hand is clamped shut. Sorry, not something wrong with it. It’s grown differently that I don’t even,

Caleb Beaver (16:13):

Is it, is it grown? What is herbs

Sevan Matossian (16:15):

Pulse? God, look at, look at my fingers compared to herbs. I’m like a dwarf. Look at, I have like, like this little sausage. Miz <laugh>. <laugh>. She has like, her fucked up hand is cooler than mine, but something’s wrong with her. Shit. Yeah. Oh, a fucking arm wrestle. The shit outta that right arm.

Caleb Beaver (16:32):

Only the right arm though.

Sevan Matossian (16:34):

Only the, yeah. Oh, fuck her up. Yeah. Right, right-handed. She’s, she’s not, something’s not right. Yeah. I can see. I love it though that she shows that look at elbow doesn’t straighten.

Caleb Beaver (16:44):

Yeah. It looks like Josh Bridge’s elbow.

Sevan Matossian (16:46):

Hey, it’s like one of those, have you ever seen, if you go to like a Walmart or something, or a Kmart and you look in the parking lot, those blackbird and start staring at their legs, they’re half those birds there have a fucked up leg. I’m not even exaggerating. Yeah, they’re all, they’re all fucking like, got cloth feet or a legs broken off. What happens to those birds? That’s a hard life.

Caleb Beaver (17:06):

They’ll probably just keep flying as much as they can.

Sevan Matossian (17:10):

Okay. So she’s a runner. She’s not a handstand walker for sure. This girl

Caleb Beaver (17:14):


Sevan Matossian (17:15):


Speaker 5 (17:15):

This arm is clearly a lot more than my dominant arm.

Speaker 4 (17:21):

You know, leg length difference is something that does qualify. Okay. Getting you into the games. All right. Um,

Speaker 5 (17:28):

I definitely have a difference in size here.

Speaker 4 (17:31):

I agree. Put my forearms on the table.

Sevan Matossian (17:32):

What the fuck? Look at her wrist, dude.

Caleb Beaver (17:35):

Oh wow. There is the forum’s even shorter. That’s crazy.

Sevan Matossian (17:40):

She got a bird hand on that right hand.

Caleb Beaver (17:43):

Yeah, it’s basically like a, it’s like a claw.

Sevan Matossian (17:46):

Yeah. Okay, so we agree something’s jacked up.

Caleb Beaver (17:49):

Yeah, definitely.

Sevan Matossian (17:50):

Okay. That’s not a filter.

Caleb Beaver (17:53):

No, I don’t think so. <laugh>,

Speaker 4 (17:55):

They’re different sizes. I cannot supinate my hand around to face me. Like I literally have no extension through my wrist. And you’re telling me I What does

Sevan Matossian (18:07):

That mean? What does that, what does that mean? She can’t supan she can’t do this thing.

Caleb Beaver (18:10):

Yeah, so she, so like supination is like your hand up, like your palm up and then pronation is your palm down. Okay. So she can’t like rotate her palm

Sevan Matossian (18:19):

So she can’t wipe her ass with that hand? No, she can’t supine

Caleb Beaver (18:22):

Unless she does it with like the back of her hand.

Sevan Matossian (18:24):

Oh. Oh. And uh, and she, and she can’t get extension. What does that mean?

Caleb Beaver (18:29):

Like, she can’t flex her wrist or extend her wrist up like that. Oh,

Sevan Matossian (18:33):

Okay. Perfect.

Speaker 4 (18:36):

In the open. How am I meant to do a handstand walk? How am I meant to put my hand flat? How am I meant to do a clean, I can’t go into this position. Like my wrist is fused together. I can’t put my hand flat to put my hand down. I actually this,

Sevan Matossian (18:50):

Oh my God. Look how nice her legs are.

Speaker 4 (18:52):

My thumb is permanently dislocated. I cannot Jesus put my thumb out. It, I clearly have an impairment. I have 50% less muscle in this arm than I do in my good arm.

Sevan Matossian (19:05):

Yeah. That shoulders

Speaker 4 (19:06):

Actually, like putting a cup of coffee to my mouth is a struggle. I have to take my bath to the coffee. Like, I am furious that a

Sevan Matossian (19:14):

Something’s wrong with me. I just can’t get over how attractive she is. I I can’t even listen to her. I wanna see her legs again. <laugh>. She should have done this with a bag on her head.

Caleb Beaver (19:24):

<laugh>, just a audio <laugh>.

Sevan Matossian (19:27):

Oh, look at David. Be what a crybaby, dude. My God. Okay. Uh, this is where we miss grown up. Uh, Brian reporting <laugh>. Oh my God. It’s just so hard. I’m just such a, it’s like,

Caleb Beaver (19:52):

Thing is just,

Sevan Matossian (19:53):

She’s a sunflower. I just see her as a sunflower. I don’t see, I can’t even listen to her. She’s just a big giant sunflower to me. I don’t know what that means, but I just, I love a sunflower

Caleb Beaver (20:04):


Sevan Matossian (20:05):

Uh, wait, hold on. Bailey wants to say something. Uh, Bailey Walker. They just said she doesn’t fit in that category. Right? She probably does fit into another though. Correct. She still has an arm or other people in the category don’t category don’t have one at all. Well, that’s why Clive wants an adult here. Like, um, to be like, no. Well Caleb’s, he, he’s in the military. He could he’ll figure it out. Hang tight. I keep interrupting him. Hang tight. Caleb will figure it out for us.

Caleb Beaver (20:29):

I think she, she really just needs to send another email. <laugh>

Sevan Matossian (20:32):

<laugh>. Well it might be too late now, right? Shit’s closed up.

Caleb Beaver (20:35):

Yeah, maybe. I don’t know. I just, usually if, uh, from my perspective, if somebody emails me in like the Negatory and like doesn’t give me an option, I’m just gonna email them back and say like, Hey, what the fuck?

Sevan Matossian (20:47):

How about this one neuromuscular?

Caleb Beaver (20:50):

Mm. Yeah. I suppose I think like palsy itself is a neuromuscular, it looks like, well her kind of palsy is like a, here I’ll show you what I’ve found about her’s

Sevan Matossian (20:59):

Palsy. I’ll read this too. Uh, uh, here’s an adult. This guy’s an adult, uh, uh, Tyler Watkins. The issue is the adaptive ath athletes have to perform a workout viewed by CrossFit to determine if they qualify. Some are treating it serious and giving effort. Others are making it look worse. Oh, you mean like, like <laugh>? Like, like you wanna be in the one leg category. So you just drag your leg around even though Okay. It does kind of work. <laugh>. Oh, neuro is gone.

Caleb Beaver (21:26):

Oh, well that explains that.

Sevan Matossian (21:30):

Oh, put her in the hurt. Do they have a hurt feelings division?

Caleb Beaver (21:33):


Sevan Matossian (21:34):

I wish they had a vaccine injured division.

Caleb Beaver (21:37):

<laugh>. Oh,

Sevan Matossian (21:44):

Uh, we should look at her, uh, Instagram one. This is done and see if we can see more of her legs. Uh, uh, one of the major issues is, is CrossFit only has a handful of categories where other adaptive competitions have about doubled the number of categories. I dunno if that is, I dunno if problem’s the right word, but I hear you. I mean, dude, there’s only 20, I think yesterday Brian showed me there’s only 20 dudes in the short stature. Won the midget division. And by, but those dudes should be fully exploited, by the way.

Caleb Beaver (22:13):

Yeah, I it,

Sevan Matossian (22:14):

Hmm. I would bring those fuckers into the Collosseum and have them do something for sure.

Caleb Beaver (22:19):


Sevan Matossian (22:20):

Everyone wants to see those dudes do shit. I wanna see those dudes do like bar muscle ups and shit. Oh, we just, we’re not, we just skipped to trying to find their legs. Oh

Caleb Beaver (22:32):


Sevan Matossian (22:38):

Uh, is there may, is it do, can we start at the end again or no? Yeah. Hold on. Okay. Let’s hear, let’s hear her out. Maybe she, she comes up with something, um,

Speaker 4 (22:49):

A topic this sensitive to

Sevan Matossian (22:51):

Someone. Oh, here we go. Nice.

Speaker 4 (22:52):

In such a terrible, terrible way. Like CrossFit, you, you need to do better. Like what is happening?

Sevan Matossian (23:00):

Yes. This is

Speaker 4 (23:01):

Sensitive. Then you’re trying to make it fair, but by not allowing people who have legitimate, uh, disabilities, that is not making you fair. I, I’m so mad right now. I don’t even know what to do.

Sevan Matossian (23:16):

I can think of a few things you should do

Caleb Beaver (23:19):


Sevan Matossian (23:20):

Or why does it say Herbs Pol or herbs?

Caleb Beaver (23:24):

Herbs Palsy. I think that’s what the kind of disability that she has, it looks like. The way that it’s just described is that, uh, she had some sort of trauma to her. Like, so there’s a, a nerve cluster in your shoulder is called a plexus and it kind of like IVs all of your, like from your shoulder down. And so when you have a trauma to that, it can cause atrophy or, uh, dec decreased growth in the musculature around, uh, in the arm.

Sevan Matossian (23:54):

Maybe the division should be called somebody’s gonna get their feelings hurt. Division.

Caleb Beaver (24:00):

Well, that would be more ideal probably

Sevan Matossian (24:03):

Because she’s pissed because basically two, two things are conflated. She doesn’t feel like it’s being handled sensitively enough. Which unfortunately I’m the wrong person to talk to about that.

Caleb Beaver (24:15):


Sevan Matossian (24:16):

Cuz I have no, I, I struggle with empathy in that division. But the other thing is she, she, I think she doesn’t, she’s pissed because she does think she’s, I don’t know what the word is, tared. Handicapped. Fucked up. Broken fits. She thinks she fits into one of the categories and they say she doesn’t and she’s pissed.

Caleb Beaver (24:39):

I mean, she doesn’t really fit into the normal, I mean, I shouldn’t say normal to like the open category either. So I suppose if she’s not gonna fit into the open category, then she should probably fit into one of the other ones.

Sevan Matossian (24:51):

Well that arm is clearly not, can’t do all like if it, I mean that arm is not an arm.

Caleb Beaver (24:58):

Yeah. It’s not super functional. Yeah, I think she probably has, she’s probably figured out a way to use, do some things with it. Like she said, she can like at least hold a coffee cup. Yeah. But at the same time, like she’s not gonna be doing muscle ups or handstand walks or like,

Sevan Matossian (25:14):

Does she have a boyfriend?

Caleb Beaver (25:16):

I think I saw that. She might have.

Sevan Matossian (25:18):

I’d love to interview him just for like five minutes. Can he call in? I wanna ha, I have some questions.

Caleb Beaver (25:27):

Maybe not.

Sevan Matossian (25:28):

Okay, so what, what do you do Caleb? Uh, uh, we have, we have a thousands of more of these videos to look at.

Caleb Beaver (25:34):

Um, send a, send a scathing email to CrossFit. That’s usually what I would do.

Sevan Matossian (25:38):

What, what? Oh, she has a kid already little photo dump Christmas and years. Oh. Oh, that’s her brother. And it doesn’t help that she has an English accent. Cuz that makes her even seem more mature to me.

Caleb Beaver (25:52):

Is that, is that the, that’s the, the standard for maturity.

Sevan Matossian (25:56):


Caleb Beaver (25:57):


Sevan Matossian (25:58):

I’m just like, Hey, you’re an adult. Suck it up. Hey. Uh, but I I, I let her in. I would let her in into the one-armed, Hey, what’s the worst thing that can happen? Other one-armed people are like, fuck that. That bitch is too capable.

Caleb Beaver (26:10):

Yeah. I don’t see why they wouldn’t just be like, yeah, sure, no problem. Like, I don’t, I don’t know that they have so many people in that division that they can’t just

Sevan Matossian (26:18):

Well, you don’t wanna screw, you don’t wanna screw them and be like, you know how like they’re letting, uh, like Leah Thomas, you don’t wanna, like, they’re letting dudes swim in women’s meets. You if that arm is too, oh, let’s look at that red dress picture. Yeah. Let her in. I, I can clearly see in this photo something’s wrong with her arm. <laugh> the fuck. I’m just imagine I was imagining myself going out in that dress. What that is. I would not be comfortable in that. That’s, there’s no, you can’t. I I feel naked in that.

Caleb Beaver (26:50):

You’re definitely not a homopho then.

Sevan Matossian (26:53):

<laugh>. Uh, just, oh, there. What about this? That’s interesting. Just tell her she can’t use that arm.

Caleb Beaver (27:00):

Well, that’s what they do in like the upper the, in that division. Like if somebody has like, like they have the arm but it’s not fully functional. Yeah. They make them like strap it to their chest basically. And then they can only use their like dominant arm.

Sevan Matossian (27:15):

No shit.

Caleb Beaver (27:16):

Yeah, I’ve seen it. Uh, I can’t remember exactly where I saw it, but like, the guy has an arm, like he has two arms. One of them’s just not functional. They have the other one attached to their arm.

Sevan Matossian (27:27):

And is that the rule? They tell you you can’t use it?

Caleb Beaver (27:29):


Sevan Matossian (27:30):

Because that’s like, uh, mark Fuentez is saying not true.

Caleb Beaver (27:33):

All right, fine. Mark fucking tell me where, tell

Sevan Matossian (27:37):

Me what’s right bro. She has arms. I know. Like it, right? She you’ll only see legs. It’s so hard. I’m telling you. You, you don’t smile and put a bag on your head and resend the video. Don’t stand up and show us your quads.


It’s so fucking, it’s like, it’s like, it’s like talking to us about eating keto while you’re parading around a fucking box of chocolates. Well, I say let her in un I say it’s too bad you can’t vote on it. You can’t get all the other one-armed dudes to be like, uh, no. Too, too much arm too. I mean, that’s the only drawback if you’re actually, if, if at the end of the day it’s equivalent to letting a dude into a chicks competition, like if she’s just too good, right? Yeah. The whole point is, is you have to be fucked up. So they’re trying to give a place to even the playing field. Uh oh, here we go. Uh, Patrick Clark called, uh, one Leg to stand on.

Caleb Beaver (28:39):

Who’s another adaptive athlete. Oh, this is lower body though.

Sevan Matossian (28:47):

Oh yeah. I’ve seen this chick. This chick’s account is huge. She’s all over my like, uh, CrossFit, uh, or Instagram search wants me just to spend all my time on this chick’s account. Um, oh, Matt Burns. That’s an interesting litmus test. Does she masturbate with that arm? What if that was one of the 20 questions to see if you’re capable

Caleb Beaver (29:10):

<laugh>? Yes. All right. You’re up. Can’t can compete.

Sevan Matossian (29:15):

Yeah. Completely functional. Why can’t it be something like hail a cab? Why does it have to be to masturbate so crass. Okay. Anyway, uh, so Caleb, can you give us a final d does she, if you were on that G Games team, would you let her in?

Caleb Beaver (29:33):


Sevan Matossian (29:33):

For sure. Yeah. Okay. Me too. All right.

Caleb Beaver (29:36):

I don’t, yeah, that’s pretty, it’s pretty stupid.

Sevan Matossian (29:40):

Oh, we need an audio cue for that. Like Caleb has spoken

Caleb Beaver (29:45):


Sevan Matossian (29:52):

That, um, I don’t know if we should keep going down perving on athletes category, but.

The above transcript is generated using AI technology and therefore may contain errors.

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