#759 – Wodapalooza 2023 Teams Day 1 Recap

Taylor Self (00:00):

This is the last event of the day.

Sevan Matossian (00:02):

Oh, that’s nice. Bam. We’re live. So we have, uh, this is the final Women’s Heat and then the Men Start? Or is this This

Taylor Self (00:09):

Is Women Women’s Heat one.

Sevan Matossian (00:10):

Oh, okay. Wow. Wow.

Taylor Self (00:12):

S Heat. Yeah. Yeah. Assie. Yeah. It’s a 15 minute cap though.

Sevan Matossian (00:16):

Okay. We’re in this, we’re in this for the, uh, long haul. Hello everyone. Tom Malise. Carra. Tom Geen. Ken Walters, the Fergie Show. Jeff GI Ben from Australia. Hi, Marco Kone. Uh, we are back, uh, final Event, day one of the Waap Plaza team competition. Uh, we will start, uh, we have the Heidi, uh, kru, Heidi Kru with an M cam, uh, in her usual spot. Uh, she had to get there three days early to get this, uh, spot. This is the, uh, synchro workout, synchro snatches and, uh, synchro muscle ups ring and bar 30, 20 10. I know many of you are surprised. I figured it out. I’m surprised. I figured it out. And, uh, we, uh, have, there’s a 15 minute time cap as Taylor Self was just, uh, sharing with me. There will be, uh, three heats in each male and female division. And this is the, uh, ass female division. I mean, the first, uh, female division.

Taylor Self (01:25):

No, it’s the ass. He, you gotta pull up that video. We just got sent to the group text of Bkg doing the row in 20 seconds.

Sevan Matossian (01:31):

Oh, okay.

Taylor Self (01:32):

That’s fucking insane, dude. It is so egregious. His judge looks like she has no idea what’s going on. He gets on the rower 10 seconds later, her hand shoots up on a 240 meter row and then boom off the rower. And, and

Sevan Matossian (01:45):

I, Hey, I heard you could game those rowers. Maybe he cracked the code. No,

Taylor Self (01:49):


Sevan Matossian (01:49):

No. Like froning. He cracked the code. He cracked the

Taylor Self (01:53):

Code. I don’t understand why he even thought it was okay for him to get up and, and go.

Sevan Matossian (01:58):

Okay. Lemme see. Uh, what’s the time code on that?

Taylor Self (02:02):

Uh, it’s in the group. 1 53.

Sevan Matossian (02:05):

21. 53 20. Thank you. Uh, just so you guys know, we’re gonna have to watch this in, um,

Taylor Self (02:15):

Segments. Yep.

Sevan Matossian (02:16):

Yeah. In, in little, uh, special portions. Uh, this is the, uh, first, first, uh, let me take us over. Uh, before we do that, let’s go over to the leaderboard and I’ll show you what, uh, maybe Taylor Self can explain, uh, what, what we’re, uh, kind of not freaking out about. That’s too strong, but what we’re watching here. Oh, okay. That’s

Taylor Self (02:38):

What we’re freaking out about. They have a first place finish in event one, and they should be nowhere near that.

Sevan Matossian (02:44):

Okay. So, uh, 9 55, uh, 0.06. And what we’re saying is, is that somehow Bkg came off the rower too

Taylor Self (02:52):

Soon. They should probably be about 10, 15 to 10 20. So they’d have like a six or seventh place finish in that event instead of a first.

Sevan Matossian (03:00):

Okay, let me see if I can find the, that thread. Okay, here it is. Okay. Uh, 1 53 20, you’re saying?

Taylor Self (03:10):

Yeah, maximize the screen. That’s fine. Where you’re at. Cuz we could see him run on and jump on the

Sevan Matossian (03:15):

Road. Yeah. And where is B kg in this mess?

Taylor Self (03:17):

He’s, he’s not on yet. They’re gonna show him. Get on.

Sevan Matossian (03:19):


Taylor Self (03:23):

So if you watch next to Ben Smith in the screen. See Bkg just gets on his rower. Black shirt, purple shorts. He’s rowing. He’s rowing. He got on the rower at the nine 30 mark. So look at the clock in the upper left hand corner at now. Says 9 35. He’s been on the rower for five seconds. All right. Click play again.

John Young (03:44):


Taylor Self (03:46):

All right. He’s been on the rower. Seven seconds. Eight seconds.

Sevan Matossian (03:49):

Oh, there he is. Right there.

Taylor Self (03:50):

I see him. 10, 10 seconds and his judge’s hand goes up. He’s been on the rower for 10 seconds. It’s a 240 meter row. Hey,

Sevan Matossian (03:59):

Did you see him get on the rower in this video? That, cuz that’s the first time I’ve seen him. Right here on the left hand side next to Ben Smith.

Taylor Self (04:05):

He gets on, he gets on 10 seconds ago and you can see him get on if you wanna rewind

Sevan Matossian (04:09):

It. Yeah, let me rewind that cuz I missed it. I was dilly dialing.

John Young (04:13):

Okay. Right here. Play from here

Taylor Self (04:16):

When it splits off into two screens. Look at the spot next to Ben Smith.

Sevan Matossian (04:20):

Okay. Up there he is. Yep. There he is. Right there.

Taylor Self (04:23):

Nine 30, he starts rowing.

Sevan Matossian (04:25):

Okay. Alright.

Taylor Self (04:26):

Then the workout,

John Young (04:28):

The camera angle is kind of clutch because we see the whole thing. Like if it wasn’t on that spot, we would not be able to see,

Sevan Matossian (04:37):

Let me say some dumb shit. He’s pulling two, he’s pulling two for one for Ben Smith.

Taylor Self (04:41):

No, that’s dumb shit. You’re right. Okay. You said some dumb shit.

Sevan Matossian (04:45):

<laugh>. Thank you John for showing a little restraint. I appreciate you, uh, showing a little restraint. John,

Taylor Self (04:52):

You’re not getting, you’re not getting hands up in 10 seconds on your fucking rower.

Sevan Matossian (04:57):

Okay. Where is he here when we cut back out to this wide shot? He

Taylor Self (05:01):

Is, he’s about to get off. You see the guy standing up? Keep going up. Right there. Right there. Just underneath him.

Sevan Matossian (05:08):

Okay. So he, this blonde girl and this guy, he’s somewhere in this mess,

Taylor Self (05:11):

Right beneath that girl. Purple

Sevan Matossian (05:12):

Shorts. He’s got the purple slate. Oh, okay. Right there. Okay. Right there. Okay.

Taylor Self (05:16):

He’s now 16 seconds into his row. He got off the rower in,

John Young (05:21):

Hey, look, he’s done. He’s done. He’s getting his shoes out.

Sevan Matossian (05:24):

Hey, I didn’t see that girl ever raise her hand. She

Taylor Self (05:27):

Did. She put her hand up. Go back to the video. Go back to the start. If you go in the workout, yeah.

Sevan Matossian (05:31):

Oh, yes. It’s her hand.

Taylor Self (05:33):

The flip is she thinking, man, I wonder what happened. Do you think he was on calories? Do you think he got on and his rower was already at 150 meters or something? Okay,

Sevan Matossian (05:43):

Let devil’s advocates

Taylor Self (05:46):

No, no.

Sevan Matossian (05:46):

Susan looks like he’s at a fucking riot. Oh no. Okay, there we go. Um, uh, what? I but he can’t see her. Isn’t he looking at his monitor?

Taylor Self (05:57):

He must be. And the only thing I can think of is that he got onto his rower and he was already at a hundred meters

John Young (06:04):

Or she told him to go.

Taylor Self (06:06):

No, she, let’s, let’s rewind a little bit and see if there’s any signal from her. I’m gonna,

John Young (06:13):

I mean, if her mouth says go, go, go. And then he, you know what I’m saying? And he just wasn’t real looking. Pay attention. Now they’re sprinting.

Taylor Self (06:25):

Nope. She didn’t do anything. She didn’t give him any indication other than that. She took her hand down.

Mattew Souza (06:32):


Taylor Self (06:32):

The fuck is that?

John Young (06:34):

So then it’s just a glitch on the rower then.

Taylor Self (06:39):


Sevan Matossian (06:42):

All right. Well we shall figure it out. Oh, there’s Ariel. Hold on. Let’s hear what Ariel has to say here.

Mattew Souza (06:47):

Oh, there’s Ariel. She said hi. What here someone that people watching with someone, people watch out the

Sevan Matossian (06:57):

All right girl. Good luck. We’ll send, send her a link after the event.

Mattew Souza (07:02):

Syd, we’ll send you a link later if you’re out.

Sevan Matossian (07:07):

I love it. Suza putting on the court pressure, even though the event’s just about to start. Oh, Suza, look at that. Slip it into the warmup area, pretending like he’s, uh, somewhat important. Well done. Suza.

Mattew Souza (07:25):

We’re getting aggressive towards the end here. We’re getting aggressive.

Sevan Matossian (07:29):

Okay, so Suza, this is the women’s, uh, is that Frederick and Gides talking or Yame talking to Annie.

Mattew Souza (07:35):


Sevan Matossian (07:36):

Okay. And so they’re, that’s basically, those are all the top dogs right there.

Mattew Souza (07:40):

This is them. Yep. Laura, Alan, right there.

Sevan Matossian (07:46):

Laura Hova.

Mattew Souza (07:48):

Hvat. That’s an Alan. That’s a friend of mine. Now

Sevan Matossian (07:51):

There’s my girl. Laura Hvat. Sarah Sigmund’s daughter. What’s the guy in the mic saying? Oh, there’s my girl catching David’s daughter. I like her yellow shoes.

Mattew Souza (08:02):


Taylor Self (08:04):

Every workout ever at any competi.

Sevan Matossian (08:08):

Preya, moose, Bruger, Alex Gaza.

John Young (08:17):

You know who I think will be really good in this event on the guy’s side?

Sevan Matossian (08:21):


John Young (08:22):

Uh, the Patrick’s team?

Sevan Matossian (08:25):

Uh, Jacob Hoeppner.

John Young (08:27):

Mm-hmm. <affirmative> and Spencer. I think they would’ve been better with Scott than Tudor, but

Sevan Matossian (08:31):

Sp Spencer and Tudor. Uh, why do you say that? Well, why do

Taylor Self (08:35):

You say fit of

Sevan Matossian (08:36):

Scott? No, but why do you think they’ll be good at it?

John Young (08:39):

Well, I just, they all move really well on the rings in the bar. Like they’re both gymnastics guys. And then, um, they’re both around the same height, so their synchronicity should be easier than somebody that’s a different height.

Taylor Self (08:53):


Sevan Matossian (08:54):


Taylor Self (08:55):

Synchronization. Yeah. Yeah. Lu Lubricity.

Sevan Matossian (08:59):

Lubricity. What’s that? How, how Well they rubbed together.

Taylor Self (09:02):

Yeah. How lubricated it is. <laugh>, what are you listening for, man?

Sevan Matossian (09:08):

I thought I heard a dog whistle, but it’s a dog howling. Uh, I see Andrea Nier. I see Gabby Manawa. I feel like this is Romper room. I see Jamie Simmons. Is that Jamie Simmons? This

Taylor Self (09:18):


Sevan Matossian (09:19):

Room? Yeah. Do you know that show?

Taylor Self (09:21):

No. What’s that

Sevan Matossian (09:22):

Show from the seventies or eighties? There was a lady like, and she had a mirror and she’s like, I see Taylor and I see John

Taylor Self (09:29):

And I see hey Ken Walters. Hey <laugh>.

Sevan Matossian (09:32):

Fuck off. Collegiality.

Sevan Matossian (09:35):


Sevan Matossian (09:37):

Uh, su I donate $25 if you walk up to Hobe right now and put your thumb in her butt. Oh, <laugh>. And ask when she’s coming on the Savon podcast.

Mattew Souza (09:46):


Sevan Matossian (09:50):

Oh God. Hey, if you do do something like that, give someone else the camera cuz I wanna see all the girls just start beating you.

Mattew Souza (09:57):

Last day. Last

Sevan Matossian (09:59):

Day, last day. Okay. Good. Good.

Sevan Matossian (10:01):


Sevan Matossian (10:05):

Oh, this is so good.

Taylor Self (10:07):

This guy Daniel Garrity. I’ve missed the last few cup podcasts, but you all seem exhausted or on edge like you’ve been locked in an elevator together for the past three days.

Sevan Matossian (10:15):

<laugh>. Yeah. How about you suck a fucking load down

Sevan Matossian (10:18):


Taylor Self (10:20):

Suck load

Sevan Matossian (10:21):

Down. I see Paige. Is that page se menza over there? Who’s that over? Oh, who would, uh, who was it that ended up having the squats that were, uh, suspect? We were debating whether that was Chloe.

Taylor Self (10:31):

Chloe. Chloe Guran. And that is page se Menza just behind Frea F Moger.

Sevan Matossian (10:39):

Okay. With the, uh, yellow diamond on her chest.

Taylor Self (10:41):


Sevan Matossian (10:42):

The yellow upside down triangle. And is that Alexis raps in the blue pants under the number six?

Taylor Self (10:46):


Sevan Matossian (10:47):

Yeah. God, good

Taylor Self (10:49):


Sevan Matossian (10:49):

Guy. Powerhouse. Uh, who’s that under the number two over there? Oh, there’s Fuo. God, I’m learning all these people. Who’s that under the number two with the white, uh, sweatshirt?

Taylor Self (11:00):

Uh, that looks zoom. Looks like no one I know.

Sevan Matossian (11:05):

And the girl to her left with the black hair with her arm on her hip. That

Taylor Self (11:09):

Might be Atlantic Carala.

Sevan Matossian (11:12):

Oh, nice. No,

Taylor Self (11:13):

No, no.

Sevan Matossian (11:15):

It’s a guess.

John Young (11:17):

Yeah, I mean, it’s a guess. But

Sevan Matossian (11:20):

I see Carrie Pierce back there. Who’s that in the yellow under the number 10? Shorty, you are picking these like way in

Taylor Self (11:26):

The back. Christie,

Sevan Matossian (11:27):

Christie. Christie. Yeah.

Taylor Self (11:29):

Oh look, Laura’s under the number 13. She’s got her big ass head over there, right? See it? <laugh>.

Sevan Matossian (11:34):


Taylor Self (11:35):

She has, not that she has a big head, but just that was, that

Sevan Matossian (11:38):

Was, yeah, I know. It’s boy talk. Boy talk. Yeah, its just boy talk.

Taylor Self (11:41):

Imagine the smells. Travis B says, I don’t know. Do you think the women’s corral smells like the men’s corral? Doesn’t ever really smell that bad. And I’m very sensitive to shit. Smells like an athlete. Stinks in my gym, dude. Oh my God. He ne he won’t hear the end of it. We have showers, I’m like, go take a fucking shower.

Sevan Matossian (11:56):

And who, who’s that European girl. I always forget her name. She’s on Sarah Sigmund’s daughter’s team right there. Uh,

Taylor Self (12:03):


Sevan Matossian (12:03):

Where underneath that guy’s armpit. Right under the number nine with the black shirt. With the white writing right here. Always forget her name. Um,

Taylor Self (12:11):

Oh, black, black top little white.

Sevan Matossian (12:14):

Yeah. God, I’ve

Taylor Self (12:16):

Asked you. She’s not, she’s not European. She’s Australian. Zeal.

Sevan Matossian (12:20):


Sevan Matossian (12:21):

Vanille. Yeah, maybe that is. Maybe that. And then who’s the girl to her left?

Taylor Self (12:25):

Uh, that’s, uh, fuck, what’s her name? Campos Victoria. Oh,

Sevan Matossian (12:30):


Taylor Self (12:30):

That’s her Fillin.

Sevan Matossian (12:32):

And then who’s this in the blue shirt right here? Like this tiny Jamie Simmons looking girl

Taylor Self (12:36):

Right in front. Yeah,

Sevan Matossian (12:37):


Taylor Self (12:38):

Is the shirt. Kira Milligan.

Sevan Matossian (12:41):

No, no, no. That’s not

Mattew Souza (12:43):

Kyra. That’s Kira. And she’s, uh, yeah, Kyra. She’s shirt too.

Sevan Matossian (12:47):

That chick’s. That’s Kyra Milligan right there with the blue shirt. Like pulling the Nick Matthew. Yes. Oh shit. Yeah, dude, look, she’s a little bite compared to the rest of those girls.

Taylor Self (12:58):

Damien, is she

Sevan Matossian (13:00):


Sevan Matossian (13:00):


Taylor Self (13:03):

Yeah. If they ask dumb questions, we cancel our membership too. Damien

Sevan Matossian (13:08):


Sevan Matossian (13:11):

Uh, okay, uh, who else we got in this mess? This pile of goodies. Who’s that on the far left over there. Just underneath the number 20 behind Mal

Sevan Matossian (13:22):


Sevan Matossian (13:23):

Like a school teacher, uh,

Taylor Self (13:24):

That looks like, oh, pan left. Susan Samza Left page se Menza. No, that was not se Menza

Sevan Matossian (13:30):


Taylor Self (13:31):

Yes. A hundred percent. Not page se Menza. 1000000000%. Not page se Menza. 100,000 billion page Menza. It’s not, she’s in the back. We already, I believe you go to the right Suza. Go to the right. I’ll show you guys page. Se menza.

Sevan Matossian (13:46):

She’s, but maybe we yellow, maybe we locate right there.

Taylor Self (13:49):

She has the yellow triangle upside.

Sevan Matossian (13:51):

Oh. Christine Coleen brander. I see her with the yellow headband on back there.

Taylor Self (13:55):

Paige Simon Menza has the bun right there in the black.

Sevan Matossian (13:59):

Christine Kobrand having questions for the judge. Of

Taylor Self (14:02):


Sevan Matossian (14:02):

Hang on, I’m gonna get some audio on this. You think it just sounds like a bunch of birds squawking?

Taylor Self (14:07):

Yeah, let’s hear it.

Sevan Matossian (14:11):

How close are you to them? Susie, you must be close. Cause I know that’s a wide angle lens. Hey, can you turn on the audio?

Mattew Souza (14:16):

Yeah. Let me, I’m gonna take you outta my head. I’m gonna make you loud. See, it’s

Sevan Matossian (14:21):


Sevan Matossian (14:21):

Hey, you’re uncomfortably close, huh? Even though it doesn’t look like it, you’re uncomfortably close, huh?

Sevan Matossian (14:30):


Sevan Matossian (14:30):

What he’s doing right there is hard. I used to hate that being down there with the camera. He’s just fucking

Sevan Matossian (14:37):

Pointing these

Sevan Matossian (14:38):

Fucking athletes. You’re not sure what the fuck to do with yourself.

Taylor Self (14:42):

Yeah. It sounds like a fucking New York subway station. Just mute him.

Sevan Matossian (14:46):

Hey, who’s that girl on the gray? Right there on the right? I love trying to, I I love try imagining what they’re all thinking.

John Young (15:01):

Why is Sue just so close to

Sevan Matossian (15:02):

Me? Yeah, yeah, yeah. It’s so good. <laugh>. Ah, I love it. Everyone’s going to line up under their number. They’re told to line up under their number.

Speaker 6 (15:16):


Taylor Self (15:17):

In the seat. How do you pronounce this guy’s name? Will Tebow. Why do you think pro CrossFitters are insufferable?

Sevan Matossian (15:24):

Haven’t watched any of the comp. Most, uh, proc CrossFitters are insufferable. But I watched this stream to hear from Savon. What a powerful force. Why? Oh, well, thank you. Uh, Will’s a, uh, regular on Fox News. Did you know that?

Taylor Self (15:37):

Is he really? Yeah. What do you mean? What does he do?

Sevan Matossian (15:40):

He is a, uh, has a senior position at Hey,

John Young (15:45):

Annie’s got a child, will. So that makes no sense.

Sevan Matossian (15:48):

He’s got a, he is a, has a senior, he’s a senior position at it’s a, uh, think tank. Fuck. I think it’s a think tank. Uh, remind me to look him up after the show.

Taylor Self (15:57):

That’s a hot take for a Fox News anchor guy. Man. They’re thinking, is this going to be worth being childless? That’s interesting. I’m not sure what you mean by that. A lot of the men have,

Sevan Matossian (16:06):

Oh, no, I think he, well, I mean, wow. Will’s coming in hot.

Taylor Self (16:10):

What does that mean?

Sevan Matossian (16:11):

She’s coming in like what they do to their bodies. Maybe he’s, maybe he’s insinuating and they take steroids and it’s making, making their, uh, the inability for them to, uh, ovulate. I don’t know. Sounds

Taylor Self (16:20):

Like a, a Fox News take.

Sevan Matossian (16:22):

Oh, easy. Easy, buddy. Easy,

Taylor Self (16:25):

Easy. Think all big media can suck my meat.

Sevan Matossian (16:27):

All right, fair enough. All right.

John Young (16:30):

So nobody from the first heat finished.

Sevan Matossian (16:33):

Okay. I’m gonna, oh really? Wait, talk to me young. Sorry. Talk to me. Talk to me.

John Young (16:38):

Uh, the closest girls were four snatches away from finishing, or four snatched cleans from finishing. Right now the second heat’s going, uh, I think the goad girls are going to finish Jacqueline DSMs team. Um, it’s 11 minutes in and they’re on their last set of muscle up bar muscles. Muscle ups.

Sevan Matossian (16:57):

Yeah. Wow. Okay. Finally, some good information, not just some shit talking from me and Taylor. Thank you.

John Young (17:06):

They look good though. They’re ahead of everybody by a quiet a bit.

Taylor Self (17:10):

Go Wild Girls training culture. Wow. Yeah, they’re 24 reps ahead. They should be in the next heat. Really, man.

Sevan Matossian (17:20):

Is your uh, stream freezing?

Taylor Self (17:22):

Nope. My stream is AO K at the moment.

John Young (17:24):

They’re, they’re 15 reps ahead cuz once they finish the clean tin snatches. Yep.

Taylor Self (17:28):


Sevan Matossian (17:29):

I didn’t see, uh, Barnhart in there. Did you guys?

John Young (17:31):

She’s in the next heat. Oh. In the, the

Taylor Self (17:34):

Solar moves really

Sevan Matossian (17:35):

Well in this corrupt, there’s Barnhart. Amanda Barnhardt. Alrighty.

Taylor Self (17:39):


Sevan Matossian (17:41):

Hey, do you know how close Suza is to them? Right there. Thank you. Suza. That is just,

John Young (17:47):

I mean, that

Sevan Matossian (17:48):

Girl. It’s crazy shooting like that. That’s crazy. It’s so good. You’re killing it, dude. What an experience that is to be part of the fucking posse. It’s like we’re one of them. It’s like flying with a flock of birds.

Taylor Self (18:02):

You’ve done that before?

Sevan Matossian (18:03):

No, but yeah, kind of.

John Young (18:06):

And they’re done.

Taylor Self (18:08):

Beautiful. You’re ahead, John. You’re ahead, John. Keep it tight. Keep a tight lip.

Sevan Matossian (18:16):

Hey, uh, why aren’t they finishing? Uh, Taylor,

Taylor Self (18:19):

What do you mean?

Sevan Matossian (18:20):

Why aren’t they finishing? Is is it, is it designed that way?

Taylor Self (18:24):

No, it’s because the, the best teams are going to finish look, team go. Uh, just finished with two and a half minutes to spare. Uh, training culture is likely to finish. I think team explodes gonna finish best buds will finish. Invictus chicks. They’ll all finish.

John Young (18:37):

Mo most of the second heat will finish.

Taylor Self (18:39):

Yeah. First heat didn’t finish, but that’s, you know,

John Young (18:42):

It’s the first heat.

Taylor Self (18:43):

It’s like you say, what do you say? What do you always say? Sev

Sevan Matossian (18:47):

Eat a dick. Yeah,

Taylor Self (18:48):

It’s like that.

Sevan Matossian (18:50):

Uh, Chad b. Chad b I wish I was there again. Taking pictures and streaming. I think that guy was, uh, helped us with photography last year.

Taylor Self (18:57):

He took a picture of me, I believe.

Sevan Matossian (18:59):

What do I always say? The best and the, the best. The best. The

Taylor Self (19:02):

Ass heat, man. The ass

Sevan Matossian (19:04):

Heat. Gotcha. No, now is not, now is not the, uh, Johnny is saying. Um, ask, uh, I appreciate Johnny ask Hoorvath the question. I don’t think now is the time to, uh, talk to the athletes.

Taylor Self (19:17):

Laura, how’s your back feeling? How do you feel?

Sevan Matossian (19:20):

Yeah, occasionally. I guess I used to do that in the behind the scenes. I would feel them out if someone looked at me and waved me over or something. Or I thought I could squeeze in a question. Yeah. Shit. I did used to talk to ’em when they were in this line. Huh?

Taylor Self (19:32):

In the corrals. Mm-hmm. <affirmative>. Yeah. Always. Man. Come on Suza. Grow some balls. Ask somebody a

Sevan Matossian (19:36):

Question. No, Suza don’t, don’t fuck yourself. Just do what you’re comfortable with. Don’t, don’t do anything crazy. Uh uh, Mason Mitchell self said everything after top 10 or slap dicks.

Taylor Self (19:50):

That’s what the world, that’s what the world says, man.

John Young (19:54):

Okay. Training culture finished best buds and team explode are about to finish. There they go. 30 seconds left.

Sevan Matossian (20:05):

Why? Why do Synchro? I don’t understand any synchro shit. Why do synchro?

John Young (20:10):

Well, since they’re not facing each other too, it just creates a communication dynamic. I bet Mayhem does pretty good at this workout.

Taylor Self (20:17):

It’s, it’s just to test the team. Cohesion.

John Young (20:21):


Taylor Self (20:24):

Cohesiveness. Communication.

Sevan Matossian (20:26):

I, I don’t get it. I don’t get it. Why? Why? Oh, look at SU’s. Look at, oh, look at SU’s getting some love. Here we go. It’s

Mattew Souza (20:32):

Teamwork. Yeah, I like that too. How you like that table? What’d

Taylor Self (20:35):

You say? What’d you say?

Mattew Souza (20:38):

No, no, no. It looks great. It looks great. You ladies are killing it. They’re practicing their uh, victory handshake here. It’s top secret guys. Don’t tell nobody though.

Sevan Matossian (20:47):

Hey, those are, those are the great, those are the great athletes too. The ones that are like able to ham it up while in the corral. That’s good shit.

Mattew Souza (20:54):

Oh dude, the lighting situation here is epic. You see how they just turned it down and went pink and purple?

Sevan Matossian (20:58):


Taylor Self (20:59):

Do you remember last year? Do you remember last year before Celebrate 10 our workout when we were in the corrals for like an hour and a half and Noah Olson was doing his like speech with Guido on the floor. And Noah goes, listen, listen, my friend, my best friend Jake was a spectator. He came and watched and I was on the phone with him yesterday and he was like, dude, remember? And he was making fun of it. And the way he made fun of it was so fucking funny. He was like, yeah, dude. Noah’s on the floor. And he was like, wow. 10 years ago I was 22 and now I’m 32. <laugh>

Sevan Matossian (21:28):

<laugh>. Like some fast times at Ridgemont High. Shit,

Taylor Self (21:32):

Dude, it was so fucking funny. <laugh>,

Sevan Matossian (21:36):

Uh, will Thibo, Tebo. Thibo. Tibo, uh, Taylor, for what it’s worth, I was giving you mad props earlier today. You and Sev are the anchors. Don’t be offended. At least you’re not. John Young.

Taylor Self (21:48):

Love you. Will I talk shit about everybody, you and myself. Did he really

Sevan Matossian (21:51):

Say that? No. I made that part up. <laugh>

Taylor Self (21:56):

Last. John took the bait. He said. Did he really say that? Well, he,

John Young (22:00):

If you guys are the anchor, I’ve been arguing the whole time.

Sevan Matossian (22:03):

Yeah. John, John is the boat. John’s the boat. John, you’re the latrine. Bye <laugh>. Bye. You’re

Taylor Self (22:10):

The latrine. Stop it. John brings the important element. John brings the glue for our, uh, collegiate, uh, cohesion. <laugh> fuckers.

Sevan Matossian (22:20):

<laugh>. Okay. Uh, let’s go over to the Heidi cam. Uh, these are the girls we just saw in the corral. Now you were looking at the Heidi Kru cam.

Taylor Self (22:29):

Damn, the lighting is sick.

Sevan Matossian (22:31):

This is the last heat of women. Is it sick? Let’s ask Heidi. Heidi.

Speaker 7 (22:36):


Sevan Matossian (22:37):

Is um, are they gonna turn the lights on? Isn’t it too dark to judge?

Speaker 8 (22:40):

Oh yeah. I think they’re going, they’re just flashing us first.

Taylor Self (22:50):

Sounds about right.

Sevan Matossian (22:53):

Uh, Taylor reminds me of when I was young girl and sexually frustrated.

Taylor Self (22:58):


Sevan Matossian (23:00):

That’s good stuff.

Taylor Self (23:02):

It’s like a fucking

Sevan Matossian (23:03):

Heidi are are the stands full Heidi

Speaker 8 (23:06):

Mom. They’re starting to let a couple more people in now. I was thinking it’s like the fire crew that’s handling it. So I think they’re just worried about it being like too cold.

Sevan Matossian (23:17):

Uh, I I too cold. I was wondering if maybe they had different occupancy, uh, restrictions based on if it’s daytime or nighttime.

Speaker 8 (23:25):

Yeah. Sorry, I didn’t say too cold. I said if it’s uh, too cold. Like the number of people in here.

Sevan Matossian (23:33):

Oh, to code. Yes. Not to code, but to code. Not to code. I got it right.

Speaker 8 (23:40):

Is that Wisconsin accent? That’s exactly, it’s the accent

Sevan Matossian (23:45):

I was that was doing the hood. My hood accent. All right guys. Uh, final heat of the final workout day. One of the team competition of Waap Puja 2023. These are the best female teams ever, uh, anywhere, uh, put together and seen competing and they haven’t let us down yet. Um, there have been some great races. Uh, they are definitely putting on a better show than this show.

Mattew Souza (24:11):

10 seconds.

Sevan Matossian (24:12):

And here we

Mattew Souza (24:14):

Stand by.

Sevan Matossian (24:16):

Go. Oh, looks like Laura Hvat is going first Mall O’Brien. They’re lined up. Oh, Mallon catching are having some last minute communication before they go.

Taylor Self (24:25):

Dude, that was not 10

Mattew Souza (24:26):


Sevan Matossian (24:28):


Taylor Self (24:30):

It’s like when I 10 say 10

Mattew Souza (24:31):


Sevan Matossian (24:33):

Okay, so there’s a pretty fat delay.

Taylor Self (24:36):

Yeah. I think we should mute Heidi and go back to the livestream so we can commentate it for people.

Sevan Matossian (24:40):

Okay. Thank you Heidi. Yeah, that, that is a beautiful setup. Hey, uh, Susie, do you have any idea how many people that venue holds?

Mattew Souza (24:50):

I have no idea, but there’s a lot of people here say that. I mean, the campus is relatively small too. If you compare it to the games so it’s much more focused. It’s like, you know what I mean? It’s a lot. It looks, seems like a lot of people, but it might not be compared to the game that’s tended just cuz it’s so s smushed into one space.

Sevan Matossian (25:06):

And that was a 100% sexist. I could asked Heidi. I just, I just have, but I don’t think she has a girls have a fucking clue of how many people sit in a stadium. What do you think? Let’s check Heidi. How many people are in there?

Mattew Souza (25:20):

No fucking clue.

Sevan Matossian (25:22):

How many

Mattew Souza (25:24):

I have no fucking clue.

Sevan Matossian (25:26):

Yeah, I love you. Okay, what’s going on <laugh>? What? Uh, Taylor, I love you too. Don’t feel bad. Uh, what, what’s going on boys? What are we

Taylor Self (25:34):

Watching? We’re watching the synchro muscle ups. And as we were saying earlier, see Annie locks out. Boom. Then Katherine Annie’s gonna lock out first. Boom, then Katherine. So the bar muscle up, you’re gonna have a little more ti same time under tension, but more time under tension in the support position. The red doesn’t take as long, so they’re gonna have to wait at the top for that ring muscle up. We’re gonna see something similar on the barbell. The barbell’s gonna take longer to lock out and the clean’s gonna have to stand at the top and wait.

Sevan Matossian (26:00):

Hey, uh, this is stressful to watch

Taylor Self (26:05):

A lot going

Sevan Matossian (26:06):

On. Yeah.

John Young (26:07):

Hey, uh, I’m gonna work, I’m working on something for Brian revolving the B k G thing. So gimme like three minutes or if not, I won’t be saying anything.

Taylor Self (26:17):

You’re good man.

Sevan Matossian (26:18):

Uh, can we, we, we will do our best to carry the show. Uh, I apologize. Uh, John Young has prioritized another, uh,

Taylor Self (26:28):

Shit. I hope he gets the scoring fixed. Dude, do your thing, bro. All,

Sevan Matossian (26:32):

Let’s go back. Hey, I still, I still don’t understand the thing of synchro. Like, it kind of looks cool, but not it’s, but I just don’t get it. I don’t get

Taylor Self (26:39):

It. It only, in my opinion, it only looks cool if the movements are actually fully synchronized. Like everything’s happening at the same time and it looks visually pleasing. So watching them, watching one person do a rep hold it till the other person finishes, I don’t think looks as good. Um, they get to test more movement variations or modalities. So Invictus team, moving on to the barbell first, following them. Tori Dyson and Sydnee Tian.

Sevan Matossian (27:04):

Hey, that shouldn’t surprise you right there, right? Uh, Devin, Kim and Weiss getting off first. They are, they are a real games team.

Taylor Self (27:11):

Yep. See how long Devin Kim is resting in the front rack

Sevan Matossian (27:17):

And she’s yelling at Weiss Right down. Yep. Okay. They know what they’re doing

Taylor Self (27:22):

Now. They’re gonna rotate. This is Chandler Smith’s wife, Jesse Smith.

Sevan Matossian (27:29):

Hey, wouldn’t you have rotated the other way? Um, start with the snatch and then move to the easier lift to clean or I

Taylor Self (27:35):

Think, I think Devin Kim is really good on the barbell.

Sevan Matossian (27:38):

Okay. So she don’t give a fuck. Hey. But now the girl in the back, I don’t see her yelling down. Is that only Devin Kim who yells it? I

Taylor Self (27:46):

Think Britney Wise was yelling down, but, or maybe Devin’s the team lead and she’s yelling down. Not sure.

Sevan Matossian (27:51):

Okay. Yeah, they look pretty good there too. Katherine and Mal got it synced up. That’s pretty nice, right?

Taylor Self (28:02):

Yeah. They’re not yelling either. I wonder how they’re communicating. Are they just waiting for their judge to give them the go?

Sevan Matossian (28:09):

Yeah, that is true. Why aren’t they? What Annie?

Taylor Self (28:11):

I’m, they’re getting an indicator from their judge.

Sevan Matossian (28:18):

Oh wow. Laura wants, what are the weights here?

Taylor Self (28:21):

One 15 on the snatch for ladies and 1 45 on the clean,

Sevan Matossian (28:25):

One 15 on the snatch. 1 45 for the clean. And they can rotate whenever they want. There’s no rules.

Taylor Self (28:34):

I think they’re rotating every five reps. I’m not sure. I don’t know if there are rules. We are assuming they can rotate as much or as little as they want, but it looks like they’re rotating every five reps. Let’s count these reps.

Sevan Matossian (28:46):

A single scored event.

Taylor Self (28:49):

One. Ooh, look at Gabby Mag’s overhead.

Sevan Matossian (28:55):

Something’s not balanced.

Taylor Self (28:57):

You see how it’s a little soft? It’s like curved.

Sevan Matossian (28:59):

Yeah. Well, what her right arm is pulling at a different speed than her left arm. Yeah, her right arm bends.

Taylor Self (29:06):

She’s got a little internal rotation of the shoulder, which causes her to do that. It gives it almost like a soft circular shape rather than a nice sharp triangle.

Sevan Matossian (29:18):

SM t p programming. I like this shot for, uh, perspective, but then, uh, let’s quickly move onto another shot.

Taylor Self (29:36):

Brands Stutterer says we need to shut the fuck up about the live stream.

Sevan Matossian (29:40):

I just, uh, what uh, what do you mean? Uh, where

Taylor Self (29:42):

Is he? We complain about it too much.

Sevan Matossian (29:44):

We what? That’s not even fucking close to being true. We were just,

Taylor Self (29:48):

Dude. No, yesterday. Yesterday and the day before I was railing it.

Sevan Matossian (29:52):

Oh, I was complimenting it today. Some guy was ripping it in the comments today and I was complimenting it. That’s could be fur. Uh, couldn’t, that’s furthest from the truth. All right.

The above transcript is generated using AI technology and therefore may contain errors.

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