#623 – Live Call In Show ft. Fight For the Fittest

Sevan Matossian (00:00):

You don’t look very old to me, when I think of event organizers, I think of old people.

Sam (00:06):

We are young and, uh, young in business,

Sevan Matossian (00:09):

<laugh> I think of people who can’t, like, can’t, can’t compete anymore. So they default to, um,

Sam (00:14):

That’s kinda

Sevan Matossian (00:16):

Throwing events. Expect

Sam (00:18):

Kinda still me. Yeah. Yeah.

Sevan Matossian (00:19):

Uh, Sam and Kelly, right? Yes. Nice to meet you. Seon. That’s Caleb down there at the bottom. Uh,

Sam (00:24):


Sevan Matossian (00:25):

Uh, nice to meet you, mom. It, it, it’s almost showtime for you guys.

Kelly (00:29):

We’re getting there.

Sevan Matossian (00:31):

Uh, November 1st to the 21st is the online qualifier. Correct. Awesome. Um, fight for the fittest. Give me the history. Who, whose idea is that, Uh, competition?

Kelly (00:45):

Um, the main idea came from Sam. Um, I’m just,

Sevan Matossian (00:48):

And you go, you’re crazy. No, to move on. <laugh> pretty.

Kelly (00:52):

Um, that’s, that’s pretty much why I tell him every day. Um, but it started with, um, good friends of ours were opening a gym. Sam, you know, was, saw a hole in the market in our area for some good individual competitions. So it was supposed to be this big grand opening for our friends gym. We were gonna rent the place and just do this huge event. Um, we had a couple of setbacks. The gym opens late, we had to cancel. Then Covid hit, we had to cancel again. So our first year.

Sevan Matossian (01:19):

Why do you have to cancel online competition? Oh, it wasn’t online.

Kelly (01:22):

It was in person. Okay. Yeah. Sorry. So originally it was supposed to be all in person. Um, so we actually canceled twice before we ever even got, you know, got off the ground. Um, our first year during Covid, we did go online just to kind of get our feet wet, have some fun, and, you know, it was a small little event online, but we had some international participants. It was, you know, it was fun. So after that last year,

Sam (01:46):

2021, we finally got to run in person events.

Kelly (01:49):

So we did an in person at a local gym. Rx Fit in, uh, Rocky Point in Long Island, which is our good friends gym. It, we had a hundred individual competitors through intermediate and, um, RX divisions. We had a ton of vendors and it was just a blast. I mean, we had so much fun doing it. We had great feedback from, you know, all the athletes involved. So we decided to do a partner series online as our kind of second event of that year. Right. Cause

Sam (02:13):

That like two days before we’re done with this event, I’m like, all right, we gotta do another one right away.

Sevan Matossian (02:16):

You know what I, I’m, I was getting that vibe from, um, I get that vibe from Dave at the games, even before the games is finishing. He’s thinking about next year and, and, uh, recently, um, JR did Crash Crucible. And I, I could tell as the weekend went on and I was texting him, this event was like inspiring him. He was already like leaving to why next year’s is gonna be better.

Sam (02:38):

Yeah. It’s funny. I actually reached out to him on Instagram. He, he’s actually really, uh, nice and was very helpful to talk to me. And we kind of had the same, uh, philosophies and processes. But, you know, I talked to ’em about the troubles that we’ve run into or that have slowed us is cuz we we’re not gym owners, Right? And then in the, the competition, especially like kind of the local realm, that’s kind of rare. Usually people run it out of their gym, they build it up and that’s the guys, uh, you know, who do the Mac, uh, challenge. And um, you know, a lot of that qualifiers, they have gyms. So that, that’s kind of held us up. And he was able to give us some really good advice, which is keep going, keep slow, you know, don’t go too big. And that’s what Kelly does. I want to do like the four day event already. You know, let’s take a big loan and do all that. She’s like, No, chill out. <laugh>

Sevan Matossian (03:20):

It, you, you’re kind of making me think of what it’s like running a podcast. You have to go every single fucking day, Right? Or at least every other day. You have to be consistent and you just have to be patient.

Sam (03:32):

You gotta grind.

Sevan Matossian (03:33):

Yeah. You just, you have to grind. And then every and then every year, maybe a couple more people come. The, the crazy part is, is if like imagine if the first year you had 20 people at your competition and then every year you double for 10 years, you’d be bigger than like probably the games.

Sam (03:48):

Yeah. I

Sevan Matossian (03:48):

Mean that’s how fast that shit just explodes. I

Sam (03:51):

Mean, just like stick with it. Just focus like you do, like focus on putting out quality product, put out a good product, make sure people are happy, do your thing. And people, you know, either hate it or love it, but you know, you keep doing your thing.

Sevan Matossian (04:03):

So fight for the fittest. Um, you have, when’s the, when’s the deadline to register?

Sam (04:08):

The registration deadline for the online qualifier is November 15th. And the reason we do an online qualifier is cuz here in New York, it’s not, you know, 85 degrees in Sunny all the time by you. Uh, you know, we have a kind of a restriction on how many people we can have inside a gym. Uh, in January it gets kind of cold, uh, right and snowy. So that’s why we do that for the, the, uh, the winter event. The other one that we ran in September, an individual one was just open registration. And we had an a hundred athletes at that.

Kelly (04:34):

Yeah. So this was our second year doing the individual. We actually teamed up with, uh, Christian Harris and moved fast Lifts heavy this year. Um, we met Deb at our first event that we held at our friends gym. She, you know, kind of reached out to us. We figured it would be a fun collaboration for us to work together. So this year’s events are being held at Move fast lifts heavy for the in person events in Ron Conka in New York. Um,

Sevan Matossian (04:57):

Ron who?

Kelly (04:58):

Ron Cona, <laugh>,

Sam (04:59):

Ron Con. It sounds like a porno name. I hate Ron Con.

Sevan Matossian (05:02):

Sounds crazy

Kelly (05:04):

<laugh>. But, um, yeah, so these workouts this year usually, uh, Sam writes our workouts along with you. The business is owned by Sam and I, We have a really close friend, um, Dr. Haley Queller, who is our lead judge. She helps us out of the goodness of her heart. She’s a fantastic CrossFit athlete. So usually our workouts are written between Sam and and Hailey. They’ve kind of worked together to put those out. And this year Christian Harris is actually writing our workouts as part of our collaboration. So all workouts are gonna be written and demoed by him. And the online qualifier, you know, will just get people to qualify to come in person, you know, at his gym and compete in January.

Sevan Matossian (05:40):

I if the, the, it says the competition, you’re saying the deadline to register is the 15th, but it says the competition here on the Instagram starts on the first. That’s just the opening for registration or,

Sam (05:51):

So that’s when, uh, they have to start doing the workouts. So all the workouts will be released ahead of time. Time. It’s not like the open where you get one each week, you’ll have all three, uh, beforehand and you have the three weeks to complete the three workouts at your leisure.

Sevan Matossian (06:05):

Anyone else do that?

Sam (06:08):

Um, some competitions do that. Um, especially with partners and teams, it allows people to coordinate their schedules a little bit. Um, you know, we also do that cuz we want people to know what the workouts before and we want people to register, you know, if we

Sevan Matossian (06:19):

Have, And you could get some really insane times, right? Yeah. If you, if you, if it’s three workouts and you have three weeks to do them, you, I mean, theoretically you could give it your best effort three times.

Sam (06:30):

Yeah, we got some really fit, fit partners last time. It was really impressive.

Sevan Matossian (06:34):

So then the 21st online qualifiers closes November 21st and then approximately two months later on January 28th, 2023 will be fight for the fittest live finals. Correct. And those are in, um, Ron Kama?

Kelly (06:52):

Yes, Correct.

Sam (06:53):


Sevan Matossian (06:54):

Wow. And how many people will go to that?

Sam (06:57):

We’ll have 15 teams from each division. So they’ll be

Kelly (07:00):

In the RX category?

Sam (07:01):

Yeah, the only RX category. So they’ll be a male, male, male, female, female, female division. So 15 in each division.

Sevan Matossian (07:08):

Do you guys actually, um, uh, uh, provide, um, do your payouts, do you guys give the prize money or do, is it just imaginary like the other events? It’s just, it’s just imaginary money.

Sam (07:18):

Kelly May not follow, um, that a lot of the,

Kelly (07:21):

The, Yeah, I haven’t heard that.

Sevan Matossian (07:23):

Well in, in Europe and in Canada you just, um, you go to the event and you win and, and you don’t get paid. But it’s okay. It’s, it’s not, it’s not, it’s not that big of a deal. It might be a big deal in Ron Cona, but not in Europe or

Sam (07:36):

No, in New York. In New York, if you don’t get paid, you know, someone’s coming to get you. So

Sevan Matossian (07:41):

Everyone gets, and I’ve seen that arm wrestling competitions. I said that yesterday on the show. I said, If that happens at an arm wrestling competition, a fight breaks out.

Sam (07:48):

Nah, you can’t do that. No. Listen, we, we pride ourselves on, on our reputation. So, you know, we have great sponsors actually to, um, you know, last time everyone on the podium got a free pair of shoes from Reebok, uh, Mobility Wall to bar C for not to just like throw names out. But you know, like these, these, these companies have, um, been with us from the beginning and have been very generous and we’ve tried to utilize a lot of that so that way it doesn’t come out of our pocket. Uh, but we also do add in prizes, but everyone walks away with something.

Kelly (08:13):

So the online qualifier, we always do, um, prizes for the top three teams, just like it was, you know, if it was in person. Um, the prize packages for the online qualifier aren’t as large. But, you know, one thing that we really love that we think sets us apart from a lot of local competitions is our prize packages. Because, you know, Sam’s competed a bunch. I don’t compete, but Sam’s competed a bunch. And you know, I look at the athletes and they bust their butts, They train, they work hard all day and you know, they walk home with a pat on the back, which is great. But, you know, it’s nice to kind of get rewarded for your hard work. So I know a lot of the feedback we got from our last event from our podium winners was they felt like professional athletes. Like they thought it was really cool to walk away with a lot. A thousand dollars worth of prizes. Yeah. Um, you know, special, you know, packages being mailed to them from, you know, big name companies like Reebok and

Sam (09:01):

Everyone gets a shirt, everyone gets a headband junk. Gives us a headbands to get through all of our athletes and, and our staff. So we try to hook people up cuz people want people to happy.

Sevan Matossian (09:08):

It’s a trip how that changes for people. So people who go to the games for the first time, they’re so excited that when they get back to their room, they open their backpack and there’s enough clothes to cover their bed. And by the time you’re a third, third time games athlete, you’re just like, just chucked a bag. I, and, and it was like that for me too when I first started, like when CrossFit first came around and be like, Oh my god, uh, I can’t believe Reebok gave me one pair of shoes then by fucking 2017. And my head got all big. I was like, I need 10 phoning shirts. I need 17 pairs of shoes in my room and I want them laid out already when I get there. Thank you

Sam (09:45):

<laugh>. Have someone dress you too

Sevan Matossian (09:47):

Would be like, I know you can’t believe I’d get like that, but, but it happens.

Sam (09:50):

I could believe it.

Sevan Matossian (09:51):

So these people are stoked. Yeah, they get the shaker, There’s like a shaker bottle in their bag, bag of protein, some clothes, shoes, they’re being treated well, they built up to the event. It’s in a, it’s in a nice facility.

Sam (10:05):

Yeah, we have photographers, we have videographers. We try to, you know, we try to, uh, you know, highlight the athletes. I mean, you’re, you’re training hard. You’re busting your ass for a while, you know, you deserve to be, uh, giving credit.

Sevan Matossian (10:15):

Um, who, who should register for fight for the fittest?

Kelly (10:20):

So for the online qualifier, really anybody, can everyone, um, we have a scaled division, uh, we also have an RX division. We try to make the workouts accessible.

Sam (10:28):

Bottom line is if you’re able to do the open, you’re able to do these workouts. Uh, if you’re in the gym and you’re RX and your class workouts, you can take these workouts. Um, we have a lot of people that do travel. We have people come from, from Massachusetts, Connecticut, uh, Virginia, Pennsylvania. So we have all those teams signed up already. It’s worth the trip. Like, uh, you know, it’s, it’s absolutely worth the trip. We do this for those people. We, we really do it for those people. Like we both have, have real jobs. Like we, we have real professions and uh, full-time jobs. You know, we don’t make hundreds of thousands of dollars from this. And for the amount of hours that we put into it, we probably make less than minimum wage. Um, you know, we do this cuz we’re trying to build something for the athletes, for the community.

Sevan Matossian (11:07):

Do you have sympathy for those people? Um, who in all honesty, um, for the people who weren’t able to pay out the prize money, those event organizers, because part of me No, no. Somebody, Well, how about this? Those people couldn’t even compete in those countries for two years

Sam (11:22):

Now. You, you say something, you do it.

Kelly (11:24):

I mean, one thing we, that’s it we pride ourselves on is that we, you know, we want our event to be known for its integrity. So, you know, we have policies in place, we say things, but we always try to do what’s best for our athletes. You know, for example, we’ve had, you know, prizes that were supposed to be direct shipped from companies and, you know, they get lost in the mail or something happens, you know, which just happened recently. And I went outta pocket and ordered that prize just so that athlete could have it because they earned it. Right. You know, it’s not their fault that, you know, FedEx did something with it. But

Sam (11:54):

Luckily I have Kelly to make sure I don’t promise anything that, that I can deliver.

Sevan Matossian (11:58):

Would you, would you allow me, if I, I know this is gonna be hard for you guys to believe, Would you allow Jeremy and I who are, um, a one week transition to enter the women’s Master’s division? So nevermind, you don’t even have to answer that. Sorry.

Sam (12:13):

I was actually hoping we would get through the old episode without talking about Covid or gender,

Sevan Matossian (12:16):

But No problem. No problem. You don’t have, let’s talk about how

Sam (12:19):

You do whatever you

Sevan Matossian (12:20):

Want. That’s, let’s talk about how nice, uh, Christian Harris’s body is and, um, and why, um, you say you partnering with them, what do they actually do? They just, what do they do? What’s he, what’s he provide?

Sam (12:32):

So he, you know, him doing the programming has actually been really nice and it’s been a load off of me. Um, you know, he, he’s very good with programming, very knowledgeable. And then also, you know, his brand of move fast, heavy clothing line. And his brand, which is himself, uh, you know, has brought a lot more attention to our, uh, competition series. Uh, their Jim is facility is fantastic as well. It’s a beautiful facility. It’s set up for a competition. Um, and then, uh, his, his, uh, manager Deb, uh, graph has been fantastic. She’s helped us make so many contacts in the business that frankly we couldn’t, uh, do by ourselves.

Sevan Matossian (13:05):

Um, is this, um, do you see this just going on forever, fight for the fitt? Do you see it growing just every single year and just keep doing it? That’s the goal.

Sam (13:14):

Absolutely. Like I, my, I would like to see us doing a multi-day event, uh, at a larger venue with an equipment sponsor. Um, and there’s no reason why we can’t, there’s nothing like that here on the northeast. Uh, there’s nothing like that in New York. Um, there’s a demand for it. And, uh, I think it just, we have to be patient into it slowly.

Sevan Matossian (13:31):

It must be a, it must be a crazy learning curve. I remember, um, just one time, um, I I can’t remember exactly what I’m, you know, the spirit of what I’m gonna say is true. I don’t know if what I’m saying is true, but basically Greg’s like, Oh, Dave, let’s do that at the ranch. And Dave’s like, Okay. It was some event. I don’t even think it was a competition, it was just some, some gathering. And he said, um, and there were gonna be like 500 people there. And then right away I heard like Paula Gravatt was there and she was making a list of things that need to be done. And it was like order, you know, like 20 porta potties or something. And I’m like, Oh shit, I wouldn’t have even thought of that. But you can’t just have 500 people show up to the fucking middle of nowhere and they’re not be fucking some water to drink and it’s a place to shit and piss. Yeah. And it’s like, that’s like the bare minimum, but you don’t think of that. You just think, Oh yeah, just come over. It’s not a big deal. Just come over.

Kelly (14:18):

Yeah. I mean, it’s definitely been a learning curve, fortunately. Sorry, our dog is jumping. Um, cool. Fortunately it’s, uh, you know, we’ve, we’ve had successful events from the beginning and the learning curves have kind of just been, you know, little, But

Sam (14:32):

Yeah, the goal is to make the learning curve not cost you too much money, you know?

Sevan Matossian (14:36):

Oh, right, right.

Sam (14:37):

As long as you, you know, like you saw over in Europe, you know, you make mistakes, but, uh, do the right thing and, and don’t overreach. And I think that’s what I was talking about with JR. And I spoke to a couple other event organizers and they said, Don’t overreach too fast. Like stay, stay smaller as long as you can, uh, build up your name, your reputation, and then, and then start to expand. And that, I think will limit those, you know, trial by error.

Sevan Matossian (15:01):

Do you, do you, is the goal to grow bigger or more prestigious?

Sam (15:06):

Why can’t they be the same? Right.

Sevan Matossian (15:08):

Right, right.

Kelly (15:11):

Yeah, I think unfortunately too, we have a good team. You know, it’s really for the most part, just Sam and I running the business, but having our, you know, our friend Haley, who helps us out, we all kind of bring different things to the table that help, you know, balance out and, and prevent us from having any of those big errors, you know, uh, where we’ll come up with an idea and we love it. Haley might come in and say, Wait, you didn’t think of this? Yeah. Um, so it’s,

Sam (15:36):

It’s rep, it is reputation because over here in, you know, in New York and on Long Island, it’s uh, you know, there’s like a gym every five miles. There really is. And for the first year, uh, nobody would promote us. No one would, would, uh, repost our stuff. And then once people started to realize that we don’t own a gym, like we weren’t gonna steal their members, uh, the, the gym owners around here really come around.

Sevan Matossian (15:56):

Oh, that’s nice. People, people don’t own a gym, You’re not in competition with them. Right.

Sam (16:00):

People would message us and they would say, Well, how much is the membership for your gym? And I was like, Dude, I don’t have a gym. I have a job. You know, like other job. Not that, that’s not a job. Right. Um, but like, you know, I gotta go to work. Um, and once people got, you know, got to know us, and that’s why we kind of actually put ourselves out there on social media

Sevan Matossian (16:16):

A lot. And like, I have a job. I’m not a PE teacher. Right. Fuck outta here.

Sam (16:19):

Right. Exactly. Exactly. I work more than 180 days a year.

Sevan Matossian (16:23):

Right. Um, um,

Sam (16:25):

He’s a teacher.

Sevan Matossian (16:26):

Can I see Caleb? Can I see the classes that people can enter? Uh, fight, fight for the fittest. There is just the, is it broken down somewhere? Like it says like old people in the ages or like only,

Kelly (16:40):

No. So right, right now we just kind of have like a, an open, um, registration. So it’s either RX or Scaled and then, um, divided up based off of the partners. Right.

Sam (16:50):

Old people are encouraged to compete wherever they want. And we, we actually have, uh,

Sevan Matossian (16:54):

So there’s two Divi as of now, there’s two divisions this year, RX and Scaled. Correct. There’s no ages or anything that, that madness. Okay. It’s

Kelly (17:01):

Partner series, it’s RX and Scaled. And then just for our individual event that we run in late summer, early fall, that one that we just, uh, finished up, it’s actually RX and Intermediate, um, that’s for individual competitors, not for partners.

Sam (17:13):

And a lot of our masters compete in that intermediate division.

Sevan Matossian (17:16):

How many events do you do a year?

Sam (17:18):

Right now we have two uhhuh. Um, and we’re hoping to do another one hopefully in Spring. And whether that’s a team event, which is, uh, very, uh, few around here or something else. Yeah. We’re, uh, still in talks of that.

Sevan Matossian (17:30):

So are you, are you interchanging the terms partner and team?

Kelly (17:33):

No. Partners

Sam (17:35):

Two team is four.

Sevan Matossian (17:35):

Okay. Awesome.

Kelly (17:37):

Yeah, so right now we have our individual and our partner. Those are what we run currently.

Sevan Matossian (17:40):

Okay. Uh, well thank you for everything. Thanks for, uh, uh, sponsoring the show. Uh, if there’s anything we can do to help, um, if you get good clips and you want us to show them, uh, fight, Fight for the fittest, it’s awesome, awesome meeting you guys. I’m still Yeah, we love the show. Thank you so much for having Thank you. And, and we almost skirted all the, uh, the main topics, but we Yeah, I warn very much so. We did pretty good. Yeah.

Kelly (18:03):

All right. All right. Thanks guys.

Sevan Matossian (18:04):

All right guys, have a good show. Bye. Bye Chow. Thank you. Um, ladies and gentlemen, I need a one minute, uh, I need a 92nd break. Caleb and I are gonna drop in the back and then Will Branstetter, we are at, um, 1819. We’re gonna need to cut like two minutes outta the middle of the show when we go to YouTube, Caleb, but, and I will be back in two, ah, much better. Ooh. Um, back at 1949, brands that are, in case you’re the one who ends up cutting this out. I think it was 1819 to 1949. Is that it? I think you can clip that right in YouTube. Uh, I wanna play this clip. I didn’t send you this and then just in, and then it’s just, and then in the notes, um,

Sevan Matossian (20:10):

I found this after I sent you the notes in the morning, so I’m gonna play this one. Uh, I don’t even know if I should share shit like this cuz it’s so fucking scary. This is this kind of shit that scared me as a little kid. This is a site I’m trying to get this guy on the show quiver quantitative. He says, Oh, hey, I’m not, I’m, I, I can’t really speak to your audience. You, you guys are CrossFitters and, and I’m not a CrossFitting Instagram. I don’t even know what the fuck that means, but I’m like, I’m not a CrossFitting show. I’m still in denial. But, um, listen to this, this is talk. He follows the stock market and here he says something about noticing through his algorithm and the stuff he looks at, at the internet that the United States bought 270 million worth of drugs to, uh, in case there’s nuclear fallout.

Speaker 5 (20:57):

The Department of Human Health Services just bought 270 million of nuclear emergency drugs. For context, I track government contracts on my website so I can invest in them before everyone else finds out. And just today I saw that the HHS bought 240,000 doses of a drug called end plate, which costs about $1,200 for drugs

Sevan Matossian (21:15):

To, that’s a little concerning that they only got 240,000 to hosts.

Speaker 5 (21:19):

Drug is produced by Amgen, a massive pharmaceutical company, and it’s used to treat radiation sickness. This comes as Naar just announced it, lost track of a Russian nuclear submarine in the Arctic Circle. And the reason that this is such a big deal is that this submarine is believed be carrying a weapon called the Poseidon Weapon System, which I quote has the ability to create a 1600 foot nuclear tsunami. Amgen stock has been bought.

Sevan Matossian (21:41):

I I, I don’t know if I believe that.

Caleb Beaver (21:44):

I don’t needer

Sevan Matossian (21:45):

A 1600 foot tsunami. I that’s a wave. That’s a, that’s a, uh, a quarter of a mile,

Caleb Beaver (21:54):

1600 feet high or 1600

Sevan Matossian (21:56):

In the ditch. 1616 hun Ah su. Could you tell I was stressed to the max this morning?

Mattew Souza (22:03):


Sevan Matossian (22:03):

Yeah. He’s such a good dude. Look at you fucking by old shit. And you’re still helping me holding my hand through the hard times.

Mattew Souza (22:09):

We actually just finished a coliseum tour. We’re standing in the middle of ancient Rome right now.

Sevan Matossian (22:14):

So dope. Dude, that’s

Mattew Souza (22:15):

A massive like temple. And then all the, uh, stuff you could see over there.

Sevan Matossian (22:22):

God, that’s cool.

Mattew Souza (22:24):

And this is grace who’s been very patient this whole

Sevan Matossian (22:26):

Time. God, hot grace, look at you. You’re even hotter in Rome.

Mattew Souza (22:31):

<laugh>. But yeah, this is it.

Sevan Matossian (22:34):

Dude, you’re stoked. Holy cow.

Mattew Souza (22:37):

Look at that temple.

Sevan Matossian (22:38):

Hey, what would happen if you had to take a piss really bad and you just took a piss, like on that wall right there?

Mattew Souza (22:43):

It’s funny that you mentioned that because that’s what I actually have to do right now. But our tour, like our whole tour guide thing just ended. That’s what these, uh, headphones things are and I just checked it on the show and I freaked out cuz I only saw the wallpaper and I was like, Oh God, something bad happened.

Sevan Matossian (22:59):

<laugh>. Hey, hey. No, they were great. Hey, Sam and Kelly were great. That fight to the fittest segment was awesome. I, Okay, cool. Yeah, they hit it out of the park. They were killer.

Mattew Souza (23:08):

All right, Grace to telling me not to yell, I’m interrupting other tourists.

Sevan Matossian (23:11):

Hey, wait, turn around again. Turn around again. Look in the back, back there. Uh, keep spinning, keep spinning more, more, more. It’s outside of the coliseum. I saw something. Keep going, keep going, keep going, keep going. Keep go. Uh oh, stop. It’s right behind your head, I think. No, no, but way back. It’s like, it’s like a mile from you. I thought I saw something that looked like the art, the triumph. That thing that they have in France. Did I see? Oh, there it is. You see it way back there. What is that way back there? Good job. Su what is that thing that you,

Mattew Souza (23:46):

So that’s an arc that was dedicated to Tito, who is one of the emperors of Rome that went and robbed Jerusalem so they could finish the

Sevan Matossian (23:54):

College. He robbed the Jews.

Mattew Souza (23:56):


Sevan Matossian (23:57):

Fuck that dude.

Mattew Souza (23:58):

Like 3000, uh, slaves. And then they, they brought all

Sevan Matossian (24:01):

Wait, white slaves. Wait, white slaves.

Mattew Souza (24:03):

Yeah, you probably not sure they’re melatonin, but yeah.

Sevan Matossian (24:07):

Jew juice slaves. Oh, it’s always funny. 3000 years later. Don’t worry. It’s been 3000 years. It’s, You can joke about the juice slaves now and then. I can’t believe you’re there.

Mattew Souza (24:17):

You can see some other stuff too. So that bell tower that you see, uh, or maybe you guys can’t see it.

Sevan Matossian (24:23):

Yeah, yeah, I see it. That’s from Game of Thrones and shit.

Mattew Souza (24:27):

Yeah, so that’s actually, that’s not that old. It was only built in the 13 hundreds. And then this temple that you guys are seeing here was built in like 500 ad it’s been restored a couple times. And then these are all the ruins of, uh, ancient Rome here. Just a couple of the pillars and stuff still stand

Sevan Matossian (24:45):

Crazy. Hey, where’s the sewage system? Can you charging people for tours? Yeah.

Mattew Souza (24:50):

Yeah. Right.

Sevan Matossian (24:51):

<laugh>. Hey, can you, is the sewage system above ground? Can you see? Like, they’re like, Yeah, the shit used to flow down the street right here. I always like that part as a kid.

Mattew Souza (24:58):

Yeah, so you, they still have the awkward, you could see more of it like inside the coliseum of the way it worked because the col seem was actually originally

Sevan Matossian (25:05):

The place. God, this coliseum must have smelled

Mattew Souza (25:09):

Goods. Yeah, I don’t think you could see the coliseum. It’s a bit too much of a walk to get back there. But, um, they actually had to drain a river. I mean not a river, but they had to drain a whole entire lake in order to build it to where it was at. So they were actually really efficient with their way that they built the drainage system, which actually allowed it. Now this is semi controversial, but I guess they allowed it to fill it with water as well and they could reenact naval, uh, battles inside of it.

Sevan Matossian (25:32):

Please. No controversial stuff on this show.

Mattew Souza (25:35):

<laugh> speculation of if it’s true or not, but yeah, so that was, uh, and then you, another funny thing is when the, um, the middle, like the medieval times came in after this had already been abandoned for a while. They didn’t use any of the sewage system, which therefore ushered in tons of like, um, unsanitary things, which helped usher in the, the black plague.

Sevan Matossian (25:58):

Wow. Meaning the water just stood there stagnant and shit.

Mattew Souza (26:01):

Yeah. Like there was nothing that flowed in or out and they had no way to clean any stuff, anything

Sevan Matossian (26:06):

Out. Yeah,

Mattew Souza (26:07):


Sevan Matossian (26:08):


Mattew Souza (26:09):

But anyhow, there’s your ancient Rome. Uh,

Sevan Matossian (26:11):

Hey, when do you come back? There’s so much fun drama I get to fill you in on when you come back.

Mattew Souza (26:16):

<laugh>. I’ve been seeing a little bit of it, of it. I’m excited and you’ll be happy to know that we uh, you’ll be happy to know she’s not happy that we’re coming back. But we, we come back tomorrow. This is actually last night. Yes. Oh my god. So, so check this out. These uh, women here are actually,

Sevan Matossian (26:33):

I like women. I like, what are these women doing? I don’t see any women. Oh yeah, Yeah. I

Mattew Souza (26:40):

See them. And that’s um, that’s how they have to clean it.

Sevan Matossian (26:46):

Look, she’s standing on some of the ruins to clean the other ruins. That’s like the kind of shit my kids would do.

Mattew Souza (26:52):

They’re cleaning the marble pieces by hand cuz that’s how they have to clean each piece of it.

Sevan Matossian (26:57):

Hey, uh, job security. Hey,

Mattew Souza (27:02):


Sevan Matossian (27:03):

Hey dude, you could bring a fucking, you could, you

Mattew Souza (27:05):

Could just looks like she’s painting it, but they’re actually, that’s actually how they clean and restore each piece of marble.

Sevan Matossian (27:10):

I wonder if that’s like some ethnicity’s job. Do you know what I mean? Like in the United States, like if you go out to the fields in, in California, like everyone there’s from fucking south of the border. I wonder if it’s all like Belarusian people from Belarus. Yes. We come here and clean the marble. Oh, okay. Bye. Well, nice talking to you. You’re good dude. Uh, okay. Where the fuck were we? Nuclear subs. He’s, I’m all bringing the show down and he’s coming in and saying nice shit.

Caleb Beaver (27:40):

Just trying to teach us about Roman history.

Sevan Matossian (27:41):

Do they have McDonald’s in Rome? Fair? Legit question. No

Caleb Beaver (27:44):

Shit. I, McDonald’s and Rome. I think the farthest distance between McDonald’s is like 1300 miles and it’s between like Canada and Alaska or something.

Sevan Matossian (27:54):

That’s the really, that’s where the uh, biggest gap is.

Caleb Beaver (27:59):

Yeah. Otherwise everything else is like within a couple hundred miles of each of each other.

Sevan Matossian (28:04):

Probably North Africans fair. Uh, you can start by direct flight to London. Stop for a few days. Take the train to Paris, then let flight to Italy. I dunno what that means, but Hi. It’s always nice to see your face. So anyway, there’s a Russian nuclear sub that’s, that’s, uh, on its way here with the post side in it. You don’t believe the 1600 foot tsunami? Quarter mile high? I don’t,

Caleb Beaver (28:30):

Yeah. I don’t understand how it’s gonna be a six. I don’t understand how it would get that big. I also, I don’t understand how it’s gonna be radioactive either. Like, is it because it’s a new, it’s a nuke and I’ll just like make all of the water radioactive and then it’s just gonna flood.

Sevan Matossian (28:45):

What do you, do? You fire the noke straight into the ocean floor? Is that how they do it?

Caleb Beaver (28:50):

No, you could do it where you launch it and then it has like a timer on it. So like it gets a certain distance and then it’ll just explode on a timer.

Sevan Matossian (29:00):

That would just make a, a wave isn’t a tsunami, that’s a tidal wave. A tsunami is basically the ocean floor shifts in the water’s displaced and the water starts coming in one direction. That’s why like a tsunami, if the, even if the waves only two feet high, you’re fucked because it’s two feet high and it’s quadrillion billions of gallons of water coming on with, you know what I mean? It’s basically just a wall of water and maybe if it’s two feet high, it’s fucking a nightmare. Whereas a tidal wave is like, maybe he just got his words all fucked up. But a 1600 foot displacement would mean that the, the, the, the ocean floor would have to shift and then the, you know what I mean? And then the water starts going. Yeah. Cause it has to move someone else.

Caleb Beaver (29:36):

If that’s the case, then yeah, you just launch it at the fucking ocean floor.

Sevan Matossian (29:42):

I don’t like the post side and missile so much. Or nuclear subs. Especially off the West coast.

Caleb Beaver (29:48):

I’m super thrilled about that. Well, I mean, it’ll be on the east coast. You’re good for at least a few days.

Sevan Matossian (29:55):

Uh, there’s, there’s, there’s one more thing I wanna show you. Oh, a couple things. Sorry. These aren’t.

The above transcript is generated using AI technology and therefore may contain errors.

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