Sevan Matossian (00:02):
Hey, I’m more live, man. Mike’s like right in my face today.
Mattew Ouza (00:08):
I don’t know what’s gonna happen when you go back to your original lighting and stuff. Cause you look so good in that, in that apartment. There
Sevan Matossian (00:14):
I look orange. Well, my, my beach
Mattew Ouza (00:18):
Sevan Matossian (00:18):
I had a friend come over yesterday and, and uh, my life’s Do, do you, when you go to the bathroom, do your friends just come in the bathroom and just talk to you?
Mattew Ouza (00:31):
Sevan Matossian (00:32):
Yeah, it’s weird. I have a weird life.
Mattew Ouza (00:35):
Sevan Matossian (00:35):
I, I have like weird friends and shit. <laugh> Like my life is my, I remember my mom telling me when I was a kid at, um, LBJ, when he was president, he would hold, uh, conferences in the bathroom at, uh, and reporters would come in and he’d be at the urinal taking a piss. And I thought, oh, that’s weird. But like yesterday I was in the bathroom peeing and
Mattew Ouza (00:56):
Wait public bathroom, like at the,
Sevan Matossian (00:58):
No, I’m in my, my own private bathroom at my house at this house I’m staying at. And my friend, uh, And my friend, um, my friend’s over here and he comes in there cuz he is talking to me while I’m, while I’m peeing. And then, and then he just is like, Hey, come here. And he just starts trimming my beard.
Mattew Ouza (01:16):
What a good dude.
Sevan Matossian (01:18):
I was just, he was the whole thing was he wanted to trim my mustache. I asked him not to, if he would’ve pressed, I would’ve let at him though.
Mattew Ouza (01:25):
Sevan Matossian (01:26):
Hey, I don’t mean to hurt anyone’s feelings in the, um, in the, uh, comments. I really don’t. Um, I view all of you though, as it’s all just one giant show. So if you’re in the comments and you say something and I comment on it Anyway, someone DM me and was just like, Hey, it it’s like a, a regular guy, like a guy who or gal who listens all the time. And they thought I was being an asshole to him. I think may maybe, maybe I, maybe they were joking when they DMD me.
Mattew Ouza (01:58):
Sevan Matossian (01:58):
Like this a joke is this real, but I didn’t mean to offend anyone. I like this. That that’s what kind of sucks. Oh, I started fallen Bruce Wayne. Um, have you guys seen the CFME more? No. What is that? I I’ve heard. I’ve heard a little bit about that. Do you know what that is? Yeah. Um, yeah,
Mattew Ouza (02:15):
I saw what happened,
Sevan Matossian (02:16):
Although, although Travis, I did, um, sell a camera last month to pay my mortgage, but yes, I do never travel from my million dollar mansion. Uh, unless it’s an probably it’s weird. It’s a weird life. The whole, uh, oh, the that’s the bald guy. Make’s great again. Who’s he? Who’s he waring with
Mattew Ouza (02:34):
Every single other me account.
Sevan Matossian (02:36):
Oh, he, um, I think that dude’s out of his basement. Someone sent me a screenshot saying like he was on an airplane. I was like, how many masks do you think that guy wears on an airplane? Like seven,
Mattew Ouza (02:47):
Can you block the people sitting next to him? Or how does that work for him in real life?
Sevan Matossian (02:50):
Mattew Ouza (02:52):
Sevan Matossian (02:55):
That is so weird. Um, yeah. Is there, is there anything, is there anything worth showing? Is there anything that like, if, if wa zombie’s bending him over and giving it to him, I’d like to look at that? Um,
Mattew Ouza (03:08):
I think it was all in the stories. Like, let’s see if I could bring you up, but basically
Sevan Matossian (03:12):
Mattew Ouza (03:12):
He, he was like, this is a show, somebody with like a hurt back or like going like this or something like that. And <affirmative>, and um, he posted like me carrying the CrossFit meme community for the last, whatever four years.
Sevan Matossian (03:24):
Mattew Ouza (03:25):
And then wa zombie was like, yeah, sure. You and then like tagged a bunch of other meme accounts and was like, maybe these guys too. And then all of ’em just started like posting memes about making front of that dude.
Sevan Matossian (03:37):
That, that, uh, I, I think that’s been the only meme account He’s been carrying the woke crowd. That’s for sure.
Mattew Ouza (03:51):
So then zombie posted this.
Sevan Matossian (03:54):
Thank you wa zombie for keeping it real. Me carrying the CF meme, community CF meme community. I just see Danielle, Brandon. I can’t even read Danielle, Brandon. It it’s it’s I, you know, I, I think I need to start traveling with a printer cuz my notes now are only on a screen and I can only see like three or four, like things at a time. Yeah. Okay.
Mattew Ouza (04:21):
That’s how it is. And I
Sevan Matossian (04:22):
That’s um, let’s uh, let’s
Mattew Ouza (04:25):
Sevan Matossian (04:26):
I don’t even know where to start. I don’t even know where to
Mattew Ouza (04:29):
Start. Let’s make on this will make you morning.
Sevan Matossian (04:32):
Okay. Let’s see. Good. Who is that? That’s Danielle. Yeah. What happened? She’s so sore. She got stuck on the box.
Mattew Ouza (04:42):
Yeah. I just, she like tried to get off from her, waited, pull up and like the thing pulled her down, but
Sevan Matossian (04:47):
Oh, she’s wearing a w let me see one more time. She’s wearing, she’s wearing something around her waist and she did a way to pull up and just drug her ass to the ground, into like the splits. Yeah. I started following Bruce yesterday. I forget what your real name is, but it was kind of crazy. Uh, Instagram like suggested you to me. Okay. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. <affirmative> SOS. You’re a good dude. Danielle,
Mattew Ouza (05:12):
This is her just rag.
Sevan Matossian (05:15):
I didn’t know. Danielle party. That’s weird.
Mattew Ouza (05:18):
That is weird, right? Yeah. That’s weird. I wouldn’t expect that from her.
Sevan Matossian (05:21):
He blocked my personal and business account solely based on this chat space, because I’ve never called him, him out of it. Oh, you mean like he listens to the show and he heard you say something about him. And so he block, if you dude, that’s the thing, that’s the whole thing where he just got destroyed. That’s the thing going way, way, way back in the day when Mr. Woke, um, was on Noah’s account and Noah was donating money to charity and I made a comment like don’t post this, don’t, don’t give your money to, to woke people. And, um, and that wasn’t to dig at anyone except woke people. And I specifically explained what woke was in there. And, uh, he, he just went hard and the pain at me. And what was funny is there were like 40 people, I don’t know, 20 or 20, 30, 40 people like just criticizing me, just ripping me a new one after I said that. But I think that that post got like two or three or four, 500 likes, maybe more who the fuck knows of what I said. Just basically showing that like, yeah, the people who agree with me are quiet and all these other babies. Anyway, uh,
Sevan Matossian (06:20):
There was a, there was a point, oh, so basically what he did, and this is just totally out of the woke, uh, woke playbook of bullying because that’s what they do. Right. He hates black people. He hates homosexual people because, and, but he gues it as loving them. He think they, they, this whole woke crowd thing that they are doing a service, but really what they’re doing is that they’re afraid their true feelings and their true sentiment might leak out. So they go the opposite way. They go hard in the opposite way trying to attack everyone else. Like it’s, it’s basically like if 20 of us were on our horses with pitchforks going out and looking for a child molester, but the child molester was riding with us. I mean, what a that’s the best place to hide. Right, right. With the guys who are out, trying to get the child molester, isn’t it? Yeah. So he hides, he hides in that group. And what he did was is he made a threat basically saying I’m in a nutshell, I’m looking at the people who like this, like threatening you that if you liked what I posted, that you two were part of the problem,
Sevan Matossian (07:18):
He’s he, he’s probably, he, I mean, this is, these are the people who are just totally against freedom of speech. He’s probably terrified that, uh, the mass mandate’s been lifted, he’s terrified that, uh, Elon might set Twitter free. He just terrified. Guy’s a goofball. He’s a bad person. He’s a bad person. He’s got like real demons. Uh, it, um, and yet probably most of you guys listening, follow him, which is bat shit crazy to me too. You know, I saw this post today about, you know, I actually have it. I’m going to, um, send it to you. I didn’t, I just put it on here this morning. I’m gonna say, um, do you have access to your text right now? Mm-hmm
Mattew Ouza (08:00):
Sevan Matossian (08:01):
Look at this. Look at this. This is, this is our cohort. This is so sad. These are, these are probably the listeners of this show and, and, and the listeners of the show are the strong people. Good morning, Andrew. Good morning, Melissa. Good morning, Katie. Good morning. Her Geraldo, her Geraldo Camacho got Aral. Har Geraldo, uh, Chris Fuga day. He’s gotten so many. He’s gotten me so many times with the click bait titles.
Mattew Ouza (08:32):
Am I playing this? Do
Sevan Matossian (08:33):
You wanna play this? Yeah. Yeah. Play this, check this out. This is, I, I, this is like despicable and sad, but, but I, it, it it’s our, it’s our, it’s the reality of some of the strongest people in our society. If no one would’ve got on planes, they, they would’ve had lifted the massive mandate in less than a day. Oh, for sure. But one day they would’ve and now you guys are excited because they lifted them. It’s like, It’s, it’s, it’s embarrassing. It’s embarrassing. And look at this guy singing as he’s collecting mass, you know, there’s just spittle going everywhere. Everywhere. Oh, remind me to read this Danish study that came out yesterday. Oh my goodness. Oh my goodness. Okay. Can we play this
Speaker 4 (09:23):
Speaker 5 (09:23):
Transportation security administration will no longer enforce the federal mandate requiring mass in all us airports, non aircraft,
Speaker 6 (09:37):
Blue flight attendant did a happy dance. Oh,
Speaker 7 (09:39):
My gave them in the air. Like you just don’t care.
Sevan Matossian (09:48):
They’re excited that they got their masks off. When, when they didn’t have to wear them the whole time.
Mattew Ouza (10:00):
Well, the, what would
Sevan Matossian (10:01):
You let someone do to you? What would you let someone do to you before you spoke up and protested? Mr. Craig white. Good morning. My favorite listener. The rest of you can go fuck yourself. I only love Craig white. You’re out. You’re outta here too. Susan. I just want me and Craig, I just wanna have some alone time with Craig white.
Mattew Ouza (10:19):
You got it. I’ll block everybody. And
Sevan Matossian (10:21):
Mattew Ouza (10:22):
Sevan Matossian (10:23):
Hey, um, uh, someone DMI this morning saying that they didn’t get the newsletter.
Mattew Ouza (10:28):
Yeah. Usually what I do is I immediately write them back. This one sleeve is kind of hugging and the other one’s
Sevan Matossian (10:33):
Not. Yeah. Show ’em show ’em show. ’em your left arm looks bigger. You’ve only been doing curls with your left arm. Oh, that’s that? A Hiller shirt. Yeah, it is.
Mattew Ouza (10:46):
Sevan Matossian (10:49):
What were you gonna say? Uh, what were we gonna say? Something about masks Like white.
Mattew Ouza (10:55):
I was just, um, it was interesting being on the, on a flight where they had announced it. I was on at the, in one of the first flights.
Sevan Matossian (11:01):
Yes, yes, yes. The way I was telling the stories and then people didn’t take their masks off, right?
Mattew Ouza (11:06):
Yeah. Well, I didn’t, I didn’t have my mask on the whole time. So I got into the airport and I was doing bunch of stuff and I’m not, I’m not trying to, um, act like I was a tough guy. It was in my pocket. So I was prepared to pull it out of somebody, you know? Right. But I was walking past TSA secure and they both kind of looked at me and then didn’t do anything. So then from that point on, I just took it as like, right. We’re cool. We don’t have to wear it. And then there’s multiple other people in the airport that didn’t have it. And then I got on the plane and, uh, and as right as I walked on, one of the students just goes, she goes, Hey, you, she goes, yeah, yeah, yeah. You don’t have to wear it anymore.
Mattew Ouza (11:39):
Cause I looked at her and she didn’t have hers. I on, and I had mine in my hand cuz the guy at the front was like, you need to have that on by the time you boarded the plane. So I kind of did the like, and then have it in my hand and I was walking through and then I got there and she goes, yeah, you don’t have to wear that anymore. I go, oh awesome. And then they make an announcement and then people cheered just like in those videos, people cheered. And then I turn around and I look and they all still have their masks on
Mattew Ouza (12:01):
Mattew Ouza (12:03):
Including the two people next to me, which I thought was kind of funny. And then one of ’em I could hear like
Sevan Matossian (12:08):
Some judge in Florida, who’s 33 year old girl had an 80, some odd year old man who, who who’s who’s singularly focused on, uh, being afraid of diseases. Tell us to put them on. And then some 33 year old girl in Florida tell us to take them off. And the whole world in the whole United States did it. It’s so it’s so tared I I cannot, but yeah, sheep will it’s so it’s so bad. Uh, a study come, came out of, um, um, uh, Denmark.
Sevan Matossian (12:44):
Uh, I’m gonna read you some of the highlights from it. Um, therefore, as it has now been established in numerous studies, vaccines may have completely unexpected effects on overall mortal different from what could be anticipated based on the protein against the vaccine targeted disease. Let me go on to read this. The Danes summarized this neatly. Essentially you get some reduction in COVID deaths from the vaccine, but it is offset and a bit more by cardiovascular deaths alone should give quite a lot of pause. It’s fairly astonishing that this was so completely ignored around approval as is the fact that something of the order of 27,000 deaths from the vaccines have been reported to VAs you, you know, Harvard, one of the most liberal organizations and, and line organizations on the planet had said that VAs was underreported by 90. They said basically only one in 10, um, incidents was reported on bears.
Sevan Matossian (13:42):
And then, and then that was, you know, a few months prior to, um, the COVID vaccine coming out. And then the COVID vaccine came out and bears started skyrocketing and, and crickets. No one’s saying it’s over reported. All they’re saying now is that bears is unreliable because it’s volunt Terry. But if you ask any doctor, any doctor, what they think about theirs, they will tell you that they are not paid to fill that out. And that if you fill it out wrong, the consequences are extremely severe. And so therefore it’s not filled out most of the time.
Mattew Ouza (14:19):
You mean to tell me the incentive of favor, the corporation and not the people that <laugh>, that doesn’t seem like the it’s it’s
Sevan Matossian (14:25):
Mattew Ouza (14:26):
Mattew Ouza (14:27):
Sevan Matossian (14:29):
Uh, step I took your opinion into account. My next shirt has no words on it. I’ll send you one. Thank you.
Mattew Ouza (14:36):
It has no material either. It’s actually just you without a shirt.
Sevan Matossian (14:41):
Oh, is it don’t oh, cuz he just never wears his shirt.
Mattew Ouza (14:44):
Sevan Matossian (14:46):
It’s it’s nuts. I, I also saw a study and, and I’m, and I didn’t, I’m not gonna post it. That basically shows that people who are vaccinated are getting COVID at such a faster rate than unvaccinated people. But all I see when I see that is, is like, yeah. That’s that the only reason why that is is cuz UN vaccinated, people are not getting tested. Like I would never be tested for COVID what, what would I care? I met a guy at the beach yesterday, two days ago. Who had COVID did I tell you that?
Mattew Ouza (15:09):
Sevan Matossian (15:10):
And uh, more than he had COVID I mean, we’ve met, I I met, I know you and you’ve had COVID and the um, oh, he was <laugh> he was in the hospital for 82 days.
Mattew Ouza (15:22):
Sevan Matossian (15:23):
Yeah. And I go, do you remember any of the days? He goes just a few. He had a hole here in his throat. He had a bandaid over it and then a hold down here in his, he showed me from the dude, the dude’s probably like 20 pounds overweight. And he told me he lost 50 pounds in the hospital in 82 days while he was in, uh, coma. Wow. 38 year old dude. He said, uh, he was, he was hitting a Juul, like a, like a mad man. I think he said he was smoking two cartridges of the Juul a day. Um, either, either he was shooting meth or he had, or he had, he had a long history of shooting meth in his, in his past. And um, and, and, and, and, and basically he, he, they thought he was gonna die. They had like a 5% chance of living. They said, if he was a 50 year old man, he was 38, this cat, they, he said, if he was 50, they wouldn’t have even gone through the steps to try to save him that they, that they, I guess they don’t cut that hole in your throat or down here in your stomach. If you’re, if you’re, if you’re like old, like me,
Mattew Ouza (16:21):
Do you think he respects the second chance?
Sevan Matossian (16:24):
Oh, this dude was so great. You know, what’s crazy. I was talking to this dude for 10 minutes and I was already hugging him. I don’t even think I had been, I don’t even think I was drunk.
Mattew Ouza (16:31):
Wonder. Would’ve been like before.
Sevan Matossian (16:32):
I just felt so good around him. Uh, say that again.
Mattew Ouza (16:35):
I wonder what, I wonder what he would’ve been like prior to that experience. Like, was he just like, didn’t give,
Sevan Matossian (16:40):
I think this guy is inherently a cool dude. He’s been through a lot of shit. Um, but, uh, and he’s a father, but, but for sure, I don’t know. I didn’t know. You know, I asked him that too. I’m gonna try to get him on the podcast. Yeah. Overweight, overweight, meth, head smoker, like crazy. I know at first I was like, he’s like, yeah, I almost died of COVID. And I was like, oh shit, tell me about it. Cuz I’m like, I don’t believe that shit at all. And then he told me, I’m like, oh yeah, that’s the people who die from COVID 70 pounds, overweight, 80 pounds overweight hitting the ju like it’s like, it’s like, it’s the only thing you do. Mm-hmm <affirmative>. And uh, and, and, and he, you know, former, uh, meth or heroin addict, I mean, makes sense. Right?
Mattew Ouza (17:21):
Yeah. Well, it was, it was funny. I was talking to one of the firefighters I work with. He just got back from Italy and he was like, yeah, you know, what’s crazy out there. And I go, what? And he goes just the crazy amount of people who they smoke. So many cigarettes, he goes, you get so sick of the smell because like, you know, he’s like, it’s so there much. And so many of ’em smoke all the time that they just step like right outside the door to where you might as well, still just stay inside the restaurant, but technically outside and they go, they smoke cigarettes. And the first thing I thought of was like, oh yeah, I remember when they started saying, you know, COVID deaths are spiking in Italy all the way across. Well, it’s like, you have a COVID population That lives
Sevan Matossian (17:54):
Mattew Ouza (17:55):
Younger generation. They all smoke copious amounts of cigarette. And you’re kinda like,
Sevan Matossian (17:59):
It was like, I looked at, I looked at sta up too. It was like 38% more common to smoke in Italy than any other European country or something. I mean, it was nuts. Yeah. And, and that was, is, were the stats coming outta China too? In the beginning, it was just dudes. Who’d been smoking 30 years or more. And their wives who were dying. I don’t even think I was drunk. I know I it’s. It’s crazy. You guys, I have a, um, I have a, I have a, uh, interesting personality. I basically, I I’ve come on this vacation. I really don’t drink much at home. Like once a month. Like if SU comes over, I’ll, I’ll crack a, a kombucha and I’ll dilute it. Right. SU yeah. I’ll make the can of sparkling water with a kombucha and I’ll, I’ll put it in a big Tumblr and I’ll drink it all day.
Mattew Ouza (18:41):
You’ll be like, I buzz.
Sevan Matossian (18:42):
And I’m like, I’m buzzed.
Mattew Ouza (18:43):
Sevan Matossian (18:45):
But I’m, but I’m, I’m, I’m not on vacation. I’m just in a different setting. And there’s a bar right down the street from this house. So after the show, I’ve been just going in, in, um, instead of having breakfast every morning, I’ve been having, uh, bloody marries spicy, bloody marries
Mattew Ouza (18:59):
Red bloody marries.
Sevan Matossian (19:01):
I ran, I ran, uh, 16, 100 meter sprints. I ran 100 with my, uh, boys yesterday. We ran a hundred meters on the beach. Oh, let me ask you this. I took a hundred steps to mark out a hundred meters at five, five is my, is each one of my steps, three feet.
Mattew Ouza (19:18):
I, I have no idea, but close enough. Right.
Sevan Matossian (19:21):
Mattew Ouza (19:22):
The spirit of the workout that
Sevan Matossian (19:23):
Matters. I’m like, well, I just need to look and, um, and see that it’s, uh, I don’t know if the spirit thing works here. <laugh>, that’s it <laugh> it a mile or anyway, so we, we ran a hundred meters and then we walked back and we did 16 rounds of that. Not really two of the rounds, which is just absolutely fucking nuts. If you wanna try something crazy. I think round like 10, Avi’s like, Hey, I’m gonna do jumping squats. The a hundred meters. I dare anyone to try that. I tried that, that broke him off. <laugh> so jump squat 100 meters. Oh. And then, and then, and then we walked back and we did a couple more sprints, and then he goes, Hey, I’m gonna bear crawl a hundred meters. He bear crawled the fucking a hundred meters. I had to stop like five times. <laugh> that shit is hard.
Mattew Ouza (20:11):
I believe it, he was crushing those bird piece and squats with me, then he would finish and he would count the rest of my revs. <laugh>
Sevan Matossian (20:17):
Oh, you guys were nuts. Uh, so SU was here, uh, for a few days and we, um, twice, uh, buzzed, we did, uh, to get our buzz to go away and get a workout. We did a 10, 10 burpees on the minute for 10 minutes. We did a hundred burpees. I did that a couple times with Susan and Avi and Susan and Avi, they would do the 10 buries and then 10 air squats. That’s nuts. That’s nuts. Uh, okay. Okay. That’s fair. Anthony Marquez. I’m six feet in my pace. Count for a hundred meters of 68 paces. Okay. I kept asking myself, is this a football field, but I really have no experience on a football field. So I didn’t know. Every one pace is every time my left foot takes a step.
Mattew Ouza (20:59):
Wow. Detail. Thank you.
Sevan Matossian (21:01):
Yeah, that started you confused me. You too much, too much, much. Uh, no. So, so let be clear. It’s not a steroid challenge, but, but I appreciate that. So here’s the deal. Here’s what we’re gonna do. We had too many people bomb us. Here’s what, here’s what, here’s what we’re gonna do. We’re going to give you an email address and we ask that you send a picture of it so we can judge this shit outta you.
Mattew Ouza (21:21):
No Dick picks.
Sevan Matossian (21:23):
Don’t listen to Susan, do what you want. Don’t listen to Susan he’s he’s so closed minded and send a picture of yourself and a description of why you wanna do it. And, um, I honestly, I don’t think we’re looking for someone who like, uh, regional athletes. I think we’re looking just like, for someone like schlep, like me, or, or like, you know, or like the dude who, uh, who is in, um, The hospital 82 days with COVID
Sevan Matossian (21:48):
And, uh, send it to picture. But, but, but it may maybe, maybe, I don’t know, maybe send a picture if you’re all jacked and shit too. And we’ll see what it does to you too, to get on this program, send a picture, maybe send a few sentences, a paragraph. I don’t know. And, uh, and, and, and women too, uh, this is for women and men vaginas and penises. I am, uh, uh, significantly smarter than probably most by, I don’t understand why that, if you’re a biologist, it makes you some sort of expert on COUM balls. But, uh, if you have a vagina or a penis or both, um, any, uh, derivation, I dunno what that word means. Uh, send it in, uh, what, what is the email that they would send it to?
Mattew Ouza (22:29):
Well, I think they should probably just send it to the, to the podcast email, cause I already started a file and everything else where I’ve been categorizing all of them into there. So just send it to Theon podcast at Gmail,
Sevan Matossian (22:40):
The Seon podcast, gmail.com send a picture, little paragraph.
Mattew Ouza (22:45):
Most people have been just doing it correctly with literally no instruction. Like all the emails I’ve gotten has, like they put it in the subject line and then they just give a, a brief kind of like, Hey, here’s where I am at. Here’s here’s what I, what I wanna do. Here’s where I wanna take it. I’d be willing to let you guys like show you, uh, pictures along the way and talk about it and what have you.
Sevan Matossian (23:05):
Yeah. What, what I wanna do is, is I want the person, I wanna talk to the person, um, basically get blood work done and they, and they give you some advices based on your blood work. Yeah. Um, but I would want to talk to the person like monthly on the podcast, like for 15 to 30 minutes once a month. Um, just to, just to, so the rest of us can know. Um, and, and, and, you know, and, and this will be completely unbiased. So the, the sponsor California homes has taken a risk. Right. So if you come on here and you’re like, man, my Dick shrunk, it’s like, it’s a bad for business. But if you’re like, dude, I feel incredible
Mattew Ouza (23:36):
Unless you, I need a big reduction.
Sevan Matossian (23:38):
Um, right, right. That’s right. I was so close minded.
Mattew Ouza (23:42):
<laugh> so close minded.
Sevan Matossian (23:45):
Okay. Uh, let’s burn through, um, some of these, what, what do we see? There’s no age limit. You guys can forward me. The ones with nudes mean no problem.
Mattew Ouza (23:57):
Yeah. No age limit in fact should probably be a little bit older.
Sevan Matossian (24:01):
This sounds like some right wing conspiracy shit. Testosterones king Craig. Be good. Boy. Craig, Mr. White, be a good boy.
Mattew Ouza (24:11):
Craig’s a good
Sevan Matossian (24:11):
Dude. He’s a great dude. Uh, okay. Um, can we play number? Can we, can we play number six, number six. This, I was supposed to start the show with this today.
Mattew Ouza (24:22):
Sevan Matossian (24:24):
Not, not bled for 20. Your balls will shrink. Dick will then look bigger. <laugh> oh shit. The old, smaller balls. Bigger Dick picture.
Mattew Ouza (24:33):
Sevan Matossian (24:35):
Mattew Ouza (24:37):
Oh, hold on.
Sevan Matossian (24:41):
Uh, a regular on the show. Sean G our By popular demand. I don’t think you can say that. I don’t think you can say that. We’ll ask the meme guy. If you were allowed to say that, okay, let’s go. Here we go. Sean G live on the Seon podcast. He’s adjusting the radio. When I was a kid, my dad used to make fun of Bruce Springsteen. And he would say, he sounds like he’s pinching himself when he sings. And my dad thought it was so funny and I was kind of programmed to hate that song.
Mattew Ouza (25:50):
That song. Yeah. I just like that. He is just on the freeway. No seatbelt filming himself. <laugh>
Sevan Matossian (25:58):
So walking out,
Mattew Ouza (26:00):
He’s free, man. He’s free. <laugh>
Sevan Matossian (26:04):
The best birthday I ever had. The most memorable birthday I ever had was I was, I remember I was sitting on the floor in, uh, in our family room, watching TV. I had my hands on my chin. You know how you like you as a little kid, you do that. You lay on the floor and you put your hands on your chin like this. And my mom comes home. I was a latchkey kid. I was probably, I don’t know, let’s say 11 years old. And I even remember the carpet and, and it’s a small, slight scent of carpet, cleaner and urine. We had a dog and, uh, and I was in there watching TV. That’s when the TVs were crazy, right? Like our TV was like this fucking thick. It was nuts. It was massive. Yeah.
Mattew Ouza (26:48):
Sevan Matossian (26:48):
Ahead. And it had more edge around the TV than screen. It was like probably like a 27 inch inch inch screen is such a baller TV.
Mattew Ouza (26:55):
I think Melissa predicted the story here. <laugh> you told this one.
Sevan Matossian (26:59):
Oh, I told, okay. Fine. Thanks for my story. Anyway. It was fine. I’m fine.
Mattew Ouza (27:04):
<laugh> thanks, Melissa. Thanks. Fine.
Sevan Matossian (27:07):
<laugh> my story, dad. Thank you, Melissa. Good, good. I’m getting through his list, Melissa. You’re hired. You’re hired. Have you, do you know this story too? Where you, like, we heard this story.
Mattew Ouza (27:15):
Yeah, but I don’t know what I’ve like. We’ve talked about on here and not, you know, like we
Sevan Matossian (27:20):
Talked. Okay. I’ll just tell you really quick. In a nutshell, my mom came home and she said, I, she didn’t know it was my birthday. She forgot. She forgot yet because she forgot your birthday. Damn it, Melissa, if you wanna know this story, just text Melissa.
Mattew Ouza (27:32):
Mattew Ouza (27:37):
Maybe there’s like a, this is the, um, what do they call it? When they give you a movie? That’s popular.
Sevan Matossian (27:43):
Hi. I’m I’m I’m doing a podcast. Could I call you back? Okay. Bye.
Mattew Ouza (27:48):
Who was it?
Sevan Matossian (27:49):
Just the guy in the other room. We spent the night last night.
Mattew Ouza (27:52):
Oh, right on.
Sevan Matossian (27:54):
Who shaved my beard. Oh, oh. Oh. So what were you gonna say? Sorry. What is, if you’re gonna make fun of Melissa, please do
Mattew Ouza (28:01):
It. No, wasn’t gonna make fun of Melissa. I was gonna say, this is the, like, this is like the different version where like there’s a different ending or it is like a little bit longer than the original.
Sevan Matossian (28:09):
Oh yes, yes. Yeah. You don’t know what happens. That was you’re thinking of when I was 10 Melissa.
Mattew Ouza (28:14):
Sevan Matossian (28:14):
Forgot when I was 11. My mom came home and beat me. <laugh> she? She burnt me with a curly iron how’s that
Mattew Ouza (28:21):
It was, those were rough years. Went to
Sevan Matossian (28:26):
There’s a, there’s a place here. I’m in Newport beach and the Newport beach. I’m in Newport beach. And there’s a place here called Doris a couple doors down from, from where I’m staying. And it’s a bar and I walk in there yesterday or two days ago and I order a cup of coffee. It’s like six in the morning. And the lady goes 3 23 and I give her a five and she gives me a doll back
Mattew Ouza (28:46):
Sevan Matossian (28:47):
And I go ma’am didn’t you say that the, the coffee was 3 23? And she said, yeah. And I said, well, you only gave me a dollar back. I go, I was gonna give you that 77 cents. Oh God. I sound like an old man. When I tell this story, I go, I was gonna give you that 77 cents for a tip. Where’s that money. And she goes, I rounded up.
Mattew Ouza (29:06):
Sevan Matossian (29:07):
<laugh>. Yeah, yeah, yeah. More or less. I rounded up
Mattew Ouza (29:12):
Sevan Matossian (29:17):
That’s how rich Newport beat it. She is, by the way I rounded up, I bought a coffee for 3 23. I gave her a five. She gave me a dollar back. She should have gimme a dollar 77 back for those of you don’t do math. I only got a dollar back. I said, where’s my money, honey. She said, I rounded up
Mattew Ouza (29:35):
Sevan Matossian (29:38):
Booya Obama, math. Get the step in. So, so you, you, that happened to your dad too, Alan. Crazy. So, so I’m just sitting there kind of like just a dip shit now or, or, or is Matt would say I’m sitting there like a bitch <laugh> yep. Just kind of like, uh, I’m old. I don’t get it. <laugh> you don’t use pennies anymore.
The above transcript is generated using AI technology and therefore may contain errors.
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